My husband and I have only been married a year and a half. We had the whole church wedding and reception. We would really like to do our wedding over. It wasn't a great occasion because his family was so against it. His mother and sister were there but they weren't happy about it. His father missed it because he is a truck driver. His aunts and uncles didn't show. His brother in law was fighting in Iraq. We couldn't afford a photographer so our pictures suck. Now the family loves me and the brother in law is home safe. And we have the money to have a great wedding. We'd like to have another ceremony and reception just to prove them all wrong and reaffirm our love. When should we do it? is it too soon? Any ideas???
2006-06-19 05:45:40 · 7 answers · asked by Brandy S 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If you can afford it, DO IT GIRL!!! I'm with you!!! Do it whenever you are ready!
How to renew your wedding vows
The good news is, there are far less rules and dos and don'ts about vow renewal than almost any other kind of ritual. It can be as simple as the two of you alone in a beautiful spot reciting vows you have written, or a fancy affair with hundreds of guests.
First Steps
Just as with any wedding planning, you should begin by figuring out what style of ceremony/reception you'd like, deciding a budget, picking a date and finding a venue. Some couples who are older will have much more money than when they wed the first time; others whose parents helped the first time will have far less. The good news is that vow renewals are generally cheaper than first weddings, and with less rules on what "should" be done, you can really concentrate on the elements that are important to you.
How Elaborate Should a Vow Renewal Be?
The answer to this question lies in your own reason for wanting a vow renewal ceremony. Many people chose to renew their vows because they were so caught up in the planning and the partying of their first wedding, they felt the focus of the day was taken off of the ceremony. Therefore, most vow renewals tend to be intimate celebrations, with only close family and friends present, and a lunch afterwards at a nice restaurant. Others who didn't have much money for their first wedding have very lavish ceremonies and parties afterwards.
Even if you want a big and expensive celebration, there are still a few things you should avoid:
* Don't have attendants. If you have children, you can give them a special role in the ceremony, but there is no need to designate them as bridesmaids or groomsmen. You may wish to invite your original bridal party and recognize them during the ceremony.
* Don't register for gifts. This is not the time to upgrade the china. Wedding gifts are to help a newly-married couple set up their household together.
* Don't throw bachelor or bachelorette parties. This is an obvious one – you aren't bachelors or bachelorettes!
Who Should Lead the Vow Renewal?
Since presumably you have already done the legal marriage, this ceremony will not be legally binding. Therefore, you can ask a judge or clergy member to officiate, but you can also ask a friend or an adult child to lead the ceremony. For a simple vow renewal, you don't necessarily need an officiant at all.
2006-06-19 06:19:00 · answer #1 · answered by super_sexy_amazona 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a professional Wedding Consultant:
If you're not sure on when, my suggestion would be to wait until your first "major" anniversary, which in your case would be 5 years. That way, you have your pic of reception and ceremony locations, you can really save up for it and you can take your time planning. Planning a vow renewal can be almost as involved and stressful as planning the wedding so if you can take your time, that will help keep the stress to a minimum.
I think it's a great idea especially if a lot of people missed out on the first ceremony. My father is a truck driver as well, so I can imagine how you must have felt to not have him give you away that day and it's great that your brother-in-law has returned safely.
Best of luck and happy planning
2006-06-19 06:41:57 · answer #2 · answered by Patricia D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually vows are renewed when you have been married around 20-25 yrs. Sounds like to me you want to have a another wedding that will be fabulous for the both of you and you want to share it with the family memebers that were not there the first time around. Also, don't have the wedding to prove them wrong that is not what it is for. A wedding is a promise that you make in front of God and family that you love each other and you will be together no matter what life will bring to you.
2006-06-19 06:24:09 · answer #3 · answered by solange 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would personally wait until a specific milestone. You're still showing them that you're together and you made it, but you'd be showing them even more at 5 years or 10 years. If the money is extra, take a trip, do something you would enjoy or save it up and continue saving. It never hurts to have a nest egg. I would also sugguest letting go of any resentment you currently have (if any) to those who were not initally happy for you. I would not throw all that money into something for them, but I do agree on wanting to have a nice ceremony and pictures of a joyous event. However, personally I would wait, I wish you the best of luck.
2006-06-19 08:06:57 · answer #4 · answered by rdnkchic2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do it on a special anniversary, have just been to one where they renewed their vows and then had a reception, was a lovely day for everyone concerned.
2006-06-19 06:31:23 · answer #5 · answered by delboy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it would mean a lot to you and your husband and his family, then do it. I just don't know how many people would come to another wedding when you just had one so recently.
2006-06-19 06:39:47 · answer #6 · answered by Reverie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have that much $$$ do it.
2006-06-19 05:57:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋