How Do you Know?

Question

How do you know when you have found "the one" that is right for you? As in for Marriage

You all are saying "You just know..." and I've been thinking that..My current relationship just feels so different than any before..and we are several hundred miles apart for the summer..yet we talk a lot still..more than he's ever talked with a gf...and i can talk to him about anything..we are comfortable around each other..and its a healthy relationship..thanks so much!

Answer 1

when you can be totally open with your companion if you feel as you need hide anything from her/him then that's probably not the one

Answer 2

This is a...deep question..lol. I would say if you had no doubts about the relationship, if you both had almost the same wants and needs in life. If you felt that way about the person and the other person felt the same without you having to tell them or ask them. I think if you know that the person loves you just as much as you love them then they are possibly the one. I think the crappy part is that we are all human and some times things do change and so do our feelings since they come and go. That is when you have to realize and distinguish a feeling from a decision. Deciding if a person may be the one is up to you and if you decide that you love them enough to want to spend the rest of your life with them.....thats what I would say. Lets just hope the other person makes the same decision.

Answer 3

One way is to take a compatibility inventory, especially with the help of a third party such as a clergyman who marries people. It could be that this is available to you, whatever your particular religion is. Pre-marriage counselling is available with clergymen or other counsellors and will be worth whatever time and money is spent. Often these services are free or very low-cost. Occassionally couples decide not to marry and marital pain and divorce are prevented.
Some areas to consider: Money management skills of each person, future in-law relations, desire for children, sexual attitudes, health issues, is divorce an option? (the answer should be "no"), career and education goals/requirements for each person, and other issues important to you both. God bless you and the possible marriage partner in question. It's great that you want to be wise about such an important decision. Buttercup

Answer 4

You know it's the right person when you have a combination of ALL these things:

1) Person is physically attractive to you (note that I said you, not society).

2) You can be yourself around that person (you can argue w/them w/o fear that they will leave you or physically or mentally abuse you)

3) They reciprocate these feelings to you (feelings are not one-sided) and is passionate about you.

In other words, the person who is "the one" may not be the best of any one particular point from above but MUST be a good balance of the traits above.

I used to stress about whether past relationships were "the one" or not. Once I found my wife, I realized why I stressed out in those past relationships and realized they were not "the one" (they didn't have a healthy balance of characteristics listed above).


Good Luck.

Answer 5

When you two are always happiest when you are together and you two trust each other absoloutely then they are probably "the one". My fiancee is ALWAYS happy to see me even if we don't really do anything together. She lights up if I happen to go by her station at work (she works at Wal-Mart, so I see her quite often at work). She also trust me absoloutely. I have quite a few female friends, but if I wanted to have lunch with one of them or even hang out with them she would have no problem because she knows that she's the only one with me. I suppose you know that you're made for each other when you're the only one who could possible put up with them and that they are the only one who could possibly put up with you.

Answer 6

It cannot be explained. You just "know"! I "Knew" 14 years ago that I had found my one and only and we are still as happy and as giddy as we were when we first met. We even have had 2 children and still act like that!

Answer 7

it takes a load more then " the one" the one love, two DIFFERENT q's here. COMPATIBILITY matters. Take many tests. U won't ever know. Some divorce at any time, some never do.

Answer 8

you dont you take the chance, the thrill of knowing he's the one.... but you know if you don't have doubts about him, like as in no doubts, you have arguments but you don't fight, you can see yourself with him in the future and he drops hints that he wants to be with you forever and everytime you see him or think about him you get butterflies in your stomach no matter how long you've been together.... you will just know...

Answer 9

Umm well great question...they say that you just know..and i know that doesn't help at all...to me it's like you never will know...but I'm sure you've found that person..and i wish u the best of luck!
Sorry i know i wasn't any help.....

Answer 10

You will feel very comfortable to be yourself. No pretense needed with this person.