If your spouse is an alcoholic do you have to uphold the in sickness and health vow?

Answer 1

Love is patient; love is kind
and envies no one.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude;
never selfish, not quick to take offense.
There is nothing love cannot face;
there is no limit to its faith,
its hope, and endurance.
In a word, there are three things
that last forever: faith, hope, and love;
but the greatest of them all is love.

Answer 2

Alcoholism is a sickness and both of you need some help and counseling. Try alanon first, it will help you learn to deal with things better. No, you do not have to stay in a relationship just because you took the wedding vows. If he is willing to seek treatment and really put forth an effort you may be able to work it out, if he isn't then get out. If he is abusive, either verbally or physically, or if you have children, then get out. There is help for you till you can make it on your own.

I don't think God wants us to live in misery and living with an alcoholic is miserable. Please get help for yourself even if he doesn't want help.

Answer 3

Look at the overall situation. Will the spouse get help? Will they make an attempt at getting better? If so, then, is this the person you want to stay with for life?

If they will not allow themselves to be helped, any vow you took is null and void. The vows are not literal. They are symbolic. The, For better or worse thing is just bunk. Alcohol is an illness in name only, it is a fundamental weakness in their makeup. If you think they can get better, and not fall prey to other weaknesses, then go for it. Otherwise, run while you can.


To those that say god does not want divorce. I say, any god that would prefer you be unhappy, is no god for me.

Answer 4

A vow is a vow. You don't make one if you can break it. I would do something "startling" to get his attention, and then tell him what he needs to hear. By startling , I do not mean anything that could wreck what you may have left in your marriage-but get his attention-that's imperative if you want a man to hear you. Men do not listen unless its is life or death. You may find out that you married a jerk and divorce may be the best answer. But first- get his attention-when you have it-talk to him in as few words as possible. Like--"do you want a divorce"---is much better that 700 words explaining why you are unhappy. If you use over about 10-12 words you will lose his attention. Remember short and to the point-no extra words. Good luck.

Answer 5

I don't care if is against religion i get the divorce, i not fair to live in a continuous nightmare.
but to save a future grieve before to get married get enough time to see with who are you dealing with.
If the wife or the husband were a drinker while were single after marriage will get worse.

so don't get married if you are not sure about it, but if for whatsoever reason you did it and now you can't handle the everyday life.
I have only 2single advices:
GET THE DIVORCE (and forget about what the church says they are not the ones who had the problem, instead you are in the middle of a grieve.
and f
Feelings of sorrow or comments from friends or church doesn't help at all)
second advice:
RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN AND STAY AWAY FROM THE ALCOHOLICS (is their problem not yours)

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF BECAUSE NOBODY WILL DO IT FOR YOU.

Answer 6

If your spouse is an alcoholic and they refuse to get help then I think that's a deal breaker. Living with a person who continually abuses alcohol and/or drugs can be a form of abuse, especially when there are children involved.

Answer 7

Well In my opinion yes if they were a good person. However, if the alcohol drives them to hit and beat you, then i say get the hell out of that house. So ask yourself, what kind of alcoholic are they? A heavy alcoholic that beats you or is just a terrible person, or one that is an alcoholic that is just trying to get rid of their bad habit. I say if they aren't the kind that beats u or is screaming all the time, then send them to a rehabilitation center.

Answer 8

no, alcoholism is a sickness. nobody can fault you if his sickness is killing you also. Have you gone the whole nine yards and explored all of your options? If you have tried everything and you are at your wits end, get out. If he is abusing you or you have children who witness all of this ...get out. Bottom line friend, Nobody can judge you . you have to live that life . you know what is right and what is wrong, good and bad. You definitely need to seek help for yourself. I suggest starting with alanon. Families with alcoholic problems.They can help you and your hubby. I promise.

Answer 9

Yes. Being an alcoholic is a sickness. If you truely love your spouse, you would do what you can to help them quit.
If there is physical abuse, or verbal, then you do need to leave.

And, Tyrus, alcoholism is not a choice. I'm sure if my mom could really choose not to drink, she would. You need to educate yourself about before you make sweeping statements.

Answer 10

My ex husband is an alcoholic. Oh, I think that just answered the question!

Really, I tried to get him help. He wouldn't do it. He started getting physical with me. He got verbal with the kids once and he was out the next day.
Good luck to you. Its really hard to live with it. Try ALANON its a support group for people that are living with alcoholics.

Answer 11

If your spouse is an alcoholic, I urge you to check out Al Anon. http://al-anon.org/
I was married to a user and they helped me help myself so I could deal with the situation I was in wisely. I only stayed in the group for about a year but it made a huge difference in my life. They'll help you find the answer to your question.