Ok Im a Junior and my boyfriends a senior. Weve been together for a little over three years and we plan to get married when we get settled and graduate. Hes my best friend and I love him to death but Im beginning to feel bad for him and a little guilty. When I was ten I promised my dad and myself that I would wait until I was married to have sex.
Ive kept this promise and I plan too. My only problem is that people are starting to give my boyfriend a hard time. Because of the fact that we starting dating when he was 15 and was still a virgin he hasn't had sex because he respects my decision. I feel really bad because I feel like its my fault.
I made this promise to my dad and myself no one else. I know some make it for god or some other religious reasons but I didn't. Im Satanic so I actually get teased for waiting by my Satanic friends because they think its a christian thing. My boyfriend is Atheist and therefore has no religious obligations either. I just wonder if I'm being dumb?
2006-06-18 16:53:50 · 36 answers · asked by dixiecup246 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No your not dumb. It takes a woman to stand up to her friends and say YES I'M A VIRGIN and DAMN PROUD OF IT TOO.. It also takes a MAN TO RESPECT YOUR DECISION. I applaud the 2 of you for your decision. Just ignore what your friends are saying to you because they don't need to know if you had sex or not. If you promised your dad and yourself why break that promise now. I was 24 when I lost my virginity, not because I made any promises or had a religious beliefs and just never found that right guy. And besides most of the time many would say that they wish they would have never lost there virginity and still would keep it that way. Good Luck!
2006-06-18 16:59:23 · answer #1 · answered by localgirl420 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it's a great idea.
One thing all experts agree on (Christian and otherwise) is that sex is a huge step, and you should not do it till you're completely sure you're ready physically *and* emotionally.
Sex changes relationships. Especially for girls, but for guys as well. It makes you even more attached to the person, which is not a good thing unless you're in a totally, completely committed relationship. It doesn't matter how in love you are or how many plans you have made. Remember, engaged couples break up all the time. You can't really truly know 100% until the rings are on the fingers and the I do's are said.
It might be tough now, but it will scarcely matter five, ten years from now. And don't let your friends run your live. When you're laying on your death bed 60 years from now, do you wanna beat yourself up for doing something your friends said you should, or be proud you honored the decision you made to yourself and your dad.
And ya even got the guy to agree to it.. so the hardest part's already out of the way. Just learn to tune your friends out.. It's your life, not theirs.
2006-06-18 17:41:15 · answer #2 · answered by pandasage1221 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're doing the right thing for many reasons. One you promised your father and yourself and you really should keep that. Another, sex really does belong in the bounds of a committed for life relationship. It may be tough for the two of you until you do get married, but you have so much time in the rest of your life, I promise waiting 2 or 3 years will seem like nothing before too much longer. Your boyfriend seems to understand your promise, which is great. Now if he can just ignore the peer police you can do what's best for both of you.
2006-06-18 17:00:27 · answer #3 · answered by Rossonero NorCal SFECU 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regardless of your religion, you made the decision for a personal reason. The reason for your decision is a lot more significant if you were SIMPLY doing it for your religion.
Your dad asked you not to have sex for reason, it is good that two of you had that open line of communication. If the line of communication is still there you might want to tell him that you considering having sex.
True, you could die a virgin but there are a lot worst things that could happen to you. Don't let the people outside of your relationship dictate the interactions between you and your boyfriend, maybe for now he is fine with the way things are.
Your boyfriend respect you, I am sure that if he desire to have sex with you that he don't want you to do it because you feel guilty.
2006-06-18 17:03:44 · answer #4 · answered by dscot399 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having sex has nothing to do with your believes or faith. I am not sure how old you are but I think being careful and not to rush into any thing fast, protects you from getting hurt. YOu will have the whole life time to have sex but you should consider it more carefully since you are both still very young! THa tis why may be your parents are trying to protect you from getting hurt. In life I learned not to listen too much to what people think or want, I just go with what is best for me. Because no one will be there for me when I am hurt!
2006-06-18 17:00:36 · answer #5 · answered by intpinternational@yahoogroup.com 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say wait until marriage because having is supposed to be special thing between two people. Once you two have sex with each other, there's no turning back. Do what feels right for you two. Are you ready for the consequences of having sex either having a baby or becoming sick? If you are not ready, you should not have sex because people are pressuring you into doing that.
2006-06-18 17:00:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best not to sacrifice your morals just to cave into peer pressure. You already mentioned your b/f respects your decision to wait until married, so I'm sure you would regret compromising on a promise made to your father by having sex just to prevent potential teasing from classmates.
2006-06-18 17:01:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't have SEX just because you are being made fun of, that is not a good reason, just think about when you do get married and get to have that first time on that wonder wedding night, please think about this before you just go out and have SEX. Most of the people that are making fun of you are just jealous because they have been sleeping around with other people and just wish that they were as strong minded as you and your boyfriend. Good luck.
2006-06-18 16:59:33 · answer #8 · answered by thats me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So dad's ok with you being Satanic, but he made you promise to not have sex until marriage? I'm a little confused by the contradiction.....
2006-06-18 16:58:18 · answer #9 · answered by mother_flower 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, its a beautiful thing, wait,
though I would sugest changing your religon,
and find the love of God, Not religiously, God wants a relationship and love back.
2006-06-18 17:03:17 · answer #10 · answered by rtsworld2002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋