not sure if my boyfriend is just stringing me along or really wants marriage.?

Question

my boyfriend and i have been dating for over 15 months. in the past we've talked several times about getting married. lately it seems like he doesn't really want to get married though because he's divorced. he says that it's difficult because we live in two different countries and he wants to live together for more than 3 months before making a commitment. do you think he's just making excuses and stringing me along? when i try to talk to him about it he says i'm putting pressure on him. i just want to know if we're wanting the same thing. it's not like i've given him any ultimatums or told him i want to be married by a certain date. i just don't want to be in a long distance relationship years from now and getting nowhere.

also, he's 40, i'm 32. it's not a matter of waiting only 3 months. he wants to wait longer than 3 months of living together and because i'm canadian i can only be in the u.s for 90 days at a time. i'm willing to wait more than 3 months, i just am worried i'm with someone who maybe doesn't want to get married.

Answer 1

No. Hes just a guy and they like to prolong the process of getting married. Trust me. Me and my bf have been together for 3 years and we have lived together for that past 2 and a half. And were still not going to get married until "in like 5 years" when hes ready to make "the ultimate sarifice" as I think guys view it. LOL Just enjoy each day and be happy you have someone that loves you that much.

Answer 2

you state that you & him talked about marriage several times .Usually one ask " will you marry me ,the other answers " If yes , then they may tell family & freinds ,set a date about the time right for both ( school , job ,home, etc.) .To have several times , I'd ask is it you that brings it up ? Out of niceness he may talk about it , but again living together may help, to see if you love all those possible habits as much as you love now .I seem okay on a date , but very early when I wake up ,I cough as if I need 911 .Sounds nasty and I beleive I turn blue a little .Now for a guy to live with me ,I just won't look so cute .If he said "your putting pressure on him" Then the man is being honest , he wants to live together to see if things are as good as they seem .If you do move in with him , relax , be the one he loves and allow him to bring up marriage first ,After I'd say 6 months if that doesn't happen , then he might be afraid of being married again.Time should be agreed upon , Okay even a year ,but remember the live in is for testing closer living arrangments , not for you to become a maid , mother , old lady ,But his wife ! Hope I helped .Bringing it up seems like pressure to me , he wants to be the one to ask " Will you marry me ,because I love you ".

Answer 3

Getting married would be a horrible idea at this point. He isn't just stringing you along, he is being honest about how he feels (which he sounds like an intelligent being). What you need to do before ever getting married, is close the distance gap in between you two, or marriage is useless!

Answer 4

the main suitable thank you to try this's to locate the excellent time to assert what you in user-friendly terms mentioned: "i do no longer decide to get married in the present day, day after today, or maybe next year, yet I do must be particular that this relationship is headed in that direction and that i'm no longer being strung alongside." those are your actual thoughts and you're good to have them, the trick is to permit him comprehend that those are the sentiments you're having, and not which you attempt to push some particular wedding ceremony date. I wager he hasn't truly regarded at it out of your perspective. You men DO the two ought to start having conversations approximately the place you each and every and each see yourselves 3 years from now, and ten years from now. you may no longer additionally be on the comparable internet site. and that's truly a sturdy thank you to work out if marriage interior the destiny is even a sturdy theory.

Answer 5

well it is hard having a long distance relationship but just try working it out by him living with you for about 2 months and three weeks. if he still did not ask you to married him then talk to him and tell him if he wants to get married make it a yes or no guestion if he saw's i have to think about it, then you should be over with him.

Answer 6

marriage changes everything and he knows this from his previous experience. I think he is stringing you along, I think he might be holding out for the BBD (bigger, better deal). let up off the pressure some and start weighing your options, decide that you don't really want to get married to him, don't try to fake it to scare him , but really consider you might be rushing it a bit, if he senses you pulling back , he may move closer. don't start game playing but just consider that you have more options in life instead of just him.

Answer 7

He is being very sensible by wanting to wait three months. You should want to too. It gives you the opportunity to really explore relationship and figure out where you want it to go. I wouldn't pressure him. He sounds like he is doing the right thing for everyone concerned.

Answer 8

first of all long distance relationships from different countries rarely work out. cause you both live in diff places and relationships require time together. dont press it and if he is doing this then he has basically changed his mind

it is time for you to move on

Answer 9

I don't think you should live with him before marriage. If he really loves you, he will marry you. He doesn't have to try you how you are going to be if you guys get together.

Answer 10

Wait the three months until he decides