He gets mad and tells me that I will never see her and that he will move away so finially I told him to do what he has to do just leave me out of it. I cannot take this anymore . It has been going on for 8 months, so I told him he was on his own. He told me he wouldn't call when she went into labor so, I I told him to let me know when she was here and that I wouldn't be a part of it. I AM not going to live my life watching my grandaughter used against me. I have loved her from the minute I found out about her and nothing will stop that. I just can't do the I am cutting you out of her life, and the you will never see her, the I will move away, I don't want her around you etc. I have worked in a school system for 11 years and have never had a complaint. I love each and ever kid that comes through that system onery or not, so to have this going on with my owm son is more than I can take. If you have any advise let me know.
2006-06-18 08:13:07 · 12 answers · asked by Tammy G 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Sympathy on your tough time.
Your son is 25 and needs to take responsibility for his own life. His threats with your grandchild are not a healthy sign. You need to toughen up and let him sort himself out. For that you will need some help. I recommend you have a look at some support group that will help you get through this.
2006-06-18 08:34:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
My dad and his girlfriend have the same problem. My dad's girlfriend's son is always coming around begging for money and threatens them that they will never see the 6 month old again if they don't cough up like $20 right now. It never works because once they stopped giving him money he still let them see the baby because they need a babysitter or they're out of formula. Just hang in there your son is probably just trying to use you.
2006-06-18 15:19:50 · answer #2 · answered by em 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well seems your son thinks he can go on without his mothers help.Let him do it and see how fast that he comes running back to you for help.I wouldnt let it bother you.Your son should not be treating his mother this way.Using his unborn daughter against you.Is just WRONG.I hope that he wakes up from this little dream he is in and sees that one day his mother will not be here.Then what is he going to do?Feel sorry for not letting you be in your granddaughter life.The only person that is going to be mad in this is the granddaughter.You have as much of a right to be in her life,has he does.Can you talk with the mother of the child?Maybe try and talk this out with the both of them.Tell them you would like to be apart of your granddaughters life but without all of the ********.I hope everything works out for you and you can spend time with your new granddaughter.Congrats and Good Luck.
2006-06-18 15:24:32 · answer #3 · answered by ~Devilz~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son is being an immature jerk...don't know if he's always been this way or if it's the stress of impending fatherhood but you did right by saying enough is enough. A time will come when the value of grandmother will be shown and set things to right. Still understand it hurts now but it's all a growing experience for you son and unfortunately your taking the brunt of it.
2006-06-18 15:19:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this type of emotional blackmail a pattern of his? Has he threatened to withhold things from you in the past? Has it worked?
Pardon my saying so, but it sounds like he is acting like a spoiled brat who just wants to manipulate his mom to get his way. Maybe your ignoring his "fit" will finally show him how to handle things like a grown up. I hope so, for your sake.
Just remember, no matter if he is 25 or 45 or 6 years old. You're still his mother and it's never too late to start teaching your children how to treat you. It doesn't sound like something he's going to figure out on his own. I hope it ends well.
2006-06-18 15:21:21 · answer #5 · answered by SayWhat? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hurry down to the library and pick up a copy of "Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You" by Susan Forward!!
Seriously, it will give you all the tools you need to stop his nonsense.
2006-06-18 15:23:34 · answer #6 · answered by ... 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ever hear of grandparents rights? Grandparents have rights to see their grandkids legally. Or at least thats what my mom always said. (She's really messed up in the head and my son is much happier and well adjusted without her around). But if you really need to see your grandchild, you can always take your son to court for visitation rights. Good luck.
2006-06-18 15:18:58 · answer #7 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you made a hard decision, but the correct one. It is not healthy for the granddaughter in question to see this behavior and as a result learn this behavior. one can only hope that your son will not be so callus as to cut his daughter out of your life because this will be harmful to the child. you should talk to him and advise him how this is hurting the child and hopefully he will change this behavior.
2006-06-18 15:49:28 · answer #8 · answered by koolhand_kent 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not fair that he treats his own mother that way i say you tell what need to be told and suffer the consequences later because you should not be walking around with that burden on your shoulders
2006-06-18 15:20:23 · answer #9 · answered by Diamond 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
kids are great but show your son you're not playing you're not helping your son your harming him in the long run
2006-06-18 16:21:10 · answer #10 · answered by Nani 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋