my daughter has ballet with this girl and I think the mother expects too much from her. Last night after their recital she told her tell daughter she didn't too well in her first dance. I think the whole idea is for the girls just to have fun. They are only three and four years old.
My daughter has playdates with this girl regularly and I don't want her to ever hear this negative behaviour.
2006-06-18 06:55:53 · 23 answers · asked by mysweetbrees 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
I know there is no physical abuse happening, but what about emotional abuse? Btw, the look on her daughters face was heartbreaking
2006-06-18 07:17:53 · update #1
As a mom of young kids..I would definitely say something. What if your intervention proves to have an impact on this mother, and she looks into herself to find she is expecting too much. This could help the child in the long run.
But, I would do it very discreetly. You might even want to write her a note. I think you are a brave and kind person to want to help. Good luck to you.
2006-06-18 07:00:19 · answer #1 · answered by Toolooroo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Obviously the mother is either trying to live vicariously through her daughter or is has planned it in her head htat her daughter WILL be a dancer no matter what... Yes, it's a terrible sign of worse things to come. But, I'm not sure if it's your right to get in her crazy business, regardless of how sad the poor little girl gets. I suggest you not point out the mother's behavior becaue it might get you or your daughter in trouble or in a bad situatin with the Mom. The little girl NEEDS positive encouragement and reinforcement. So, the next time you are at a dance practice or recital, be a positive influence on all the girls. Go around and compliment the girls on their performance. If you do it before the mother rips her heart out, chances are the mother will be surprised that others are cheering on her girl that she'll focus on how much fun she had, instead of how she thinks her daughter screwed up. As for the playdates, let your daughter know that you believe in her and that any negative behavior or remarks by others needn't bug her. If the girl is over at your house, thank her for helping clean up the toys, or say good things about how hey play together, or how creative or talented she can be with the things they do that day. Don't go overboard, but let her know she is a good person and that she is very much appreciated. Good Luck!!!
2006-06-18 23:35:46 · answer #2 · answered by Mexi Poff 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe you should say anything to the mother.I understand where you are coming from as far as the negativity and I commend you for realizing that this behavior from the parent can negatively affect the child but it is still not your place to advise another on how to raise their child while you and I might consider this to be bad for the child it is not in itself an abusive act so there is really nothing you can do besides try to remove your child from it and try complimenting the child on a job well done,like at a play date you could tell her that you noticed at the last recital how well she did
2006-06-18 07:10:29 · answer #3 · answered by rae b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not really your business how that other woman treats her daughter. Everyone has different parenting ideas. As long as she's not physically abusing her...butt out. BUT you should cancel playdates with the other child so that your own daughter doesn't get caught in all that.
2006-06-18 07:06:29 · answer #4 · answered by Miss Sunshine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately bad parenting exists anywhere & everywhere in this world.
Sadly... not many mothers would like to be told that they're doing a BAD job/ being a really lousy mom...
The best thing you could do is to come with a gentler way of informing her that your daughters can't spend time together, as hard as it may be, do what's right.
2006-06-18 07:05:00 · answer #5 · answered by ViRg() 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By all means yes!!! She may not appreciate it, but at least you brought it too her attention. Three year old's don't have the cognitive ability to recognize good from bad in these situations. They just want to have fun and learn. This mother sounds way to competitive and judgmental of her child and need someone to set her straight before it gets too bad for that little girl.
2006-06-18 08:25:37 · answer #6 · answered by wild4wallace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try treating your daughter extra gently around this lady, like tell your daughter and HER daughter they did GREAT in dance. Compliment both this woman and her daughter with things liike "I love your shirt" or something like that. Maybe this mom will come to understand how much more considerate it looks when a mother treats their daughter with respect.
2006-06-18 07:00:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're not close with the woman, you probably shouldn't say anything. She will just take offense. However, if you don't want your daughter around it, have the playdates at your house. Good luck.
2006-06-18 06:58:29 · answer #8 · answered by heidielizabeth69 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mothers tend to set extremly high standards for their children. Especially when it comes to sports or dance. If you see evidence of physical abuse, call the cops. If you say something to this overbearing mother you are likely to get your head bit off and told to mind your own business.
2006-06-18 07:06:15 · answer #9 · answered by Stormy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i would not say something to her b/c that is her child.. would u like it if some one told u was parenting wrong ....? if this is a prob... for u so ur girl don't have to hear negative remarks u ask if ur daughters friend can come over in stead of her got to the friends house that way u know what goes on....
2006-06-18 07:02:15 · answer #10 · answered by Mickey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋