How do you find a good counselor?

Question

Are there any real counselors who actually try to help you figure out what your or doing wrong in your life or why? Why your unhappy and what you can do to change that. I have went to a couple of different ones (at least 4 visits to each to give them a chance) but all I find is someone who either just listens and nods their heads or my current one who I think I know more about then she knows about me. She spends most of the time talking about herself and even interrupting me to give me more info about her and I actually PAY to talk to her.

I know there are real counselors out there I see some excellent ones on Oprah but how does one go about finding a good counselor without paying out the nose trying out counselors over and over?

Answer 1

Get referrals. Ask around with friends or family. People that you know who see someone. This personal experience is the best way to find a therapist who is going to work for you.

Answer 2

The counselors that just sits and listens and nod their head are doing what is called active listening. They need to get as much info. from you as possible, before they can help. After so many visits they will start asking you questions. Counselors don't give advice. They try to help you to come with the answers. Some clients tend to not say everything that is on their mind. Sometimes because of embarassment or fear of judgement. The counselor is hoping that you will become comfortable with them.

The one that told you her life story may of been trying to let you know she has been through tough times also. This is to help you understand that we are all humans with problems. Although this may of been her tactic she should never interrupt you. Interrupting you probably made you feel that your problems was not important to her, and you were only there so she can make money.

I don't know if counselors would do this, but i would see if I could set up an interview with them and find out what kind of methods they use to help people. Don't ask the girl at the desk about the doctor she ofcourse will say he or she is a good one.

Some counselors will send you home to do homework. Such as keeping a writing journal or audio journal. They will try to figure out what interests you, so you will do that homework. Good luck

Answer 3

Look for a psychologist trained in cognitive behavioral therapy so that they can help you with thought modifications and train you to talk to yourself more positively. Delving into your past (as alot of psychiatrists do) can be somewhat helpful depending upon the condition, but many psychologists find that it can be counterproductive. A little bit of that is necessary, but be wary of one that wants to start from day one of your life and keep talking about your past at each visit. If you live in the U.S., visit this link and click at the right where it says something about finding a specialist:

http://www.abpp.org/

Also, ask your family physician for a referral, they almost always know of someone. If you ask around, you would be surprised by how many people have seen a therapist, and these are always the best recommendations. Good luck -

Answer 4

Oh, memories. I had one that would take phone calls during my session. I finally said something about it, and she said I seemed "angry" about it! Uh, yes, Dr. Obvious, since I'm paying for it. Clueless wanker.

You need to feel comfortable with your therapist. You need to feel like they will also call you on your own crap-- it's easy to sit there and dance around the issues, but true therapy means facing some unpleasant situations that might cause you to have to take actions in your life that aren't necessarily convenient and that might scare you. The real work of therapy can be painful, but it's to a good end. If you don't feel like you are doing anything but scratching the surface on issues, you have to move on and find someone more competent.

Examine what it is that you want out of therapy and that might help you target a specific type of therapist to help you. They all have different specialties or approaches, so it helps you if you know what you want out of therapy going into it. Good luck!

Answer 5

If you have an employee assistance program (EAP) at work then that is a good place to start. This is a free, confidential program that can be used. If you work and that program is available then I would highly suggest using that system. I've tried it once when I had become extremely depressed. Yes, he did nod a lot and listen a lot but he asked me enough questions to cause healthy introspection and gave me just enough information and insight that I left highly appreciative. It gave me a direction to go for and I never had to return to him. He helped to alleviate a lot of anxieties simply by applying logic to some of the misconceptions that I had and that was all that I needed.

Answer 6

search on yahoo or google for B.A.C.P british assoc counsellors and psychotherapy