how, as a single dad , am i supposed to deal with a 3 year old tantrum queen?

Answer 1

i know how you feel. except mine is a 3 year old tantrum king! spouse is deployed and we're far from home so i feel your pain...almost like being a single parent. i enrolled him in a day program. i feel like such a better parent when i see him. i have a chance to miss him. he is soooo feisty and just an all around boy he drives me nuts so having him burn his energy for 4 hours a day and then coming home...he's nice and relaxed and doesn't fight me when it's bed time. also, you probably heard the saying.....terrible 2's, horrible 3's......lol

Answer 2

Put her in time out for three minutes (one per year of her life). Make sure the room where you put her is safe, and boring, and stand outside, preventing her from leaving until her time is up. Explain to her what she did and why she is there. Tell her she will be there for three minutes, no matter what, so she may as well stop shouting and screaming now. My parents used to put me in the toilet, which has only a toilet, and nothing else. She will scream her head off and sulk, but will learn that there is a consequence for her rage, and believe me, boredom is the most terrifying consequence for a child!

Alternatively, ignore her as much as possible when she has a tantrum. This way she gains no attention for her behaviour, and as such, it is not reinforced by your actions. It is essentially a method of getting her own way because she knows you will relent to shut her up.

You could also try positive reinforcement, such as a sticker chart for good behaviour, or tantrum free days. If she fulfils a pre-stated quota, she will get a small prize. Children like the structure and anticipation of reward, and this may get her on board.

You could also try taking away her privileges, e.g. her toys, one by one when she has a tantrum, and telling her that if she is tantrum free for the rest of the day, she can have one back etc.

There are many ways, but none will work immediately as she has learned this is an effective behaviour. be strong and consistent in whatever method you choose, do not occasionally relent or you will undermine yourself, and always explain to your daughter why you are doung as you do, so she can fall in line if she wishes, rather than becoming frustrated and confused.

Hope this helps!

Answer 3

Ignore her. When she goes into her award winning performance, walk out of the room. She will probably get up and follow you, throwing the tantrum again where ever you end up. Tantrums are about attention. The less attention she gets the "Queen" will see this has no effect on you. After she calms down, communicate with her. Acknowledge her and be positive. If she throws a public appearance. Take her to the car or bathroom, just get her away from people so she doesn't get to be center of attention. Its a battle of the wills. If you give into this, she want give up about other things and will fight for more control until she runs the home. "Smart little things, aren't they?" You need the patience's of "Job". Hang in there, your going to be just fine. Today, "tantrum problems", tomorrow, "boy problems". LOL They grow up to fast.

Answer 4

some people make me laugh! how can people say that their kids have never had a paddy, never kicked off if they are out somewhere. if thats the case, why arent the parents out collecting the super mum of the decade awards instead of sitting at home on Yahoo! answers, pretending to be helpful when in fact, all they are doing is putting it across that u are crap at bringing up ur child, how u should be more like them then ur raise the perfect kid!! what a load of crap!
I admire u, being a single father is a hard thing to get on with in the society that we are all in...
people in authority look down on a father raising kids single handed but they are soooooooo wrong!
Every child is different! u could try talking to ur little girl, telling her that all her screamin and stampin is getting her nowhere, u could ignore her and hope that she grows out it-does she go to playschool? u could try getting her into extra sessions at the playschool to give u the break? to be honest, theres 100's of things u could do, and im probably the worst person to advise anyone as my girl is a little bugger like this 2!! shes 7, and my boys are 5 & 9....shes not particually naughty but a typical girl! whinging to get her own way, which i am probably the guilty one of giving in for an easier, quieter life!!! good luck with solving the paddies, once uve stopped them, any chance u would email to me how u stopped the tantrums plz!!

Answer 5

My little brother had to show me that answer. I'm a single dad too, mine is now 14, but when she was 3, and having a tantrum, my brother laid down on the floor next to her and did the same thing. Screaming, kicking, pounding, the whole works. It depends a lot on presentation and timing, but, in this case, it worked. She broke out laughing with the rest of us, and was good for a couple weeks. Once you get a chance like that to point out how dumb it looks, all it takes is a reminder from then on (hopefully).

My brother just had his second daughter, and he and his wife are turning out to be really, really good parents.

Answer 6

Sit Down Like I do With My Son Tell Dem What Can And Can't Be Done Take **** Dat They Can't Live Without... Threw It Away Or Hide It Some Place Where They Would Never Be Able 2 Find...... I Can't Be There Friend U Have Lay Down The Law... When Your Child Does Something stupid don't laugh dat what they want 2 do......... Don't Be Soft Please.. Get Dat Str8... Right Now Is Dat Time ..Holla Back

Answer 7

I have 6 kids and now 2 grandkids, ive never had a problem with any of my kids or grandkids because i always stop the behaviour before it develops out of control. You dont have to smack a child for them to behave. the trick is to find out the reason for the behaviour and sort it from there. Every child needs love and good communication and also rules to follow. A little thing i never ever did was never go back on your word, if you say something you have to mean it and go through with it. They have to know the rights and wrongs of the world and the only people that can teach them are there parents. Good luck to you and your child. If you want any more advice just e-mail me.

Answer 8

LOL GOOD ONE .... best thing to do is ignore ive had this too times now and it works one day my daughter had apaddy for 2 hours and all i did was shot and ended up doing wot she wanted .... i asked the health vistior wot to do as ot was stressin me out and all she said is ....
dont look at her
dont talk to her
even leave the room as long as its safe to leave her in there on her own
after a week of heart ache she went from a two hour paddy to a 5 minute one ........ after shes finished with her paddy come to her level and calmly say what was all that about there was no need for that....... if she starts agian you start that again itll get better in two weeks she shouldnt have that much of a paddy ..... 3 year olds are clever and they no your brakein point ......

Answer 9

ignore her
don't give her anything she wants until she has calmed down and asks you nicely
My 3 yr old niece wanted to buy things at a clothing store, my brother told her no but she just kept on nagging him, before she threw a tantrum , i picked her up, took the clothes of her and hung them back up and walked out of the shop and told her dad said no, then started talking about something else, she wasn't really impressed cause she didn't get her own way but she wasn't game to argue back cause she knows i mean business..lol my brother said howd you do that i just said well you the boss arn't you? so let her know it. when my daughter was 4 ...whose now 12 threw a tantrum in the shop over a chocolate she threw herself down on the floor and screamed and yelled , so i picked her up and took her out to the car and smacked her bum..lol she never did it again at the shops, but at home she would, so i would just ignore her and not even look at her and when she calmed down. It's so hard but if you can be persistant and don't let her get her own way at all when her behaviour is bad it will pay off.

Answer 10

I don't know if this helps, but my tantrum queen spends alot of time going to her room until she stops. She then comes down and says sorry we have a cuddle. And we have fewer tantrums nowadays.