My fiance just said that he couldn't handle being with me anymore if I went drinking. Considering I'm going to marry the guy, I told him that I would give up drinking for him, but now I'm wondering if he really has a legitimate reason to ask to me to do such a thing.
You see, I don't have a drinking problem by any definition. We're only talking about three times a month here, at most! However, it is true that when I drink, I drink to get drunk. My bf dislikes alcohol because he doesn't like the idea of chemicals messing with your brain and doesn't see the point of it. He says that the reason he can't handle me drinking is because he can't see me intentionally act stupid around other people. I'm almost 21, and I'm going to give up a lot of college life if I never drink. Drinking is not super important to me, but I'm so young to miss out! It is true that I want to grow up and stop partying eventually, so maybe why not now? What should I do?
2006-06-17 21:03:17 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Your fiance has every right to ask you to give up drinking -- and you have every right to decide whether or not to agree to his request.
He is right about alcohol -- it does affect your judgment negatively. (Those "chemicals messing with your brain" are exactly why most drinkers drink.) So part of the reason for his request is concern for you. And part of the reason is personal discomfort; many people who don't like alcohol also don't like being around people who are drinking, precisely because of their relative lack of self-control. So not only does your fiance dislike seeing you get drunk, but he probably dislikes it even more because the alcohol might take away some of the qualities that he likes in you.
You certainly don't have to give up drinking just because he asks you to, but if he doesn't want to marry a drinker, that's his choice. I can totally understand it -- I don't drink at all, and I'd have a hard time staying with a woman who drinks. It would just be too uncomfortable and disappointing to watch. But anyway, I guess you just have to decide if you'd rather "miss out" on some drunken parties that you probably won't remember or "miss out" on marriage to a guy who cares about your well-being.
2006-06-17 22:09:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Drink if you want to. 3 times a month is not gonna hurt you. Chemicals messing with your brain? what a bunch of crap. There is a whole human race of history out there full of very sharp, inteligent people who enjoy a little alcohol.
2006-06-17 21:10:28 · answer #2 · answered by jessec 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the good thing here is by stating you the reasons why he'd rather have you dropping booze ,he made clear he cares for you.What about you,can't you party without getting drunk for the sake of your relationship? Why not making a deal, if it's too hard not to drink at all socially,then promise him not to get drunk and stick up to it, he'll see his concern matters to you.
2006-06-17 21:19:15 · answer #3 · answered by valerie_adele 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with him stay sane safe and sober for a healthier life.
2006-06-17 21:07:32 · answer #4 · answered by Teacher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say try to make a arrangement wth him to let u drink on cirtain occastoins
2006-06-17 21:09:35 · answer #5 · answered by DJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if my partner asked me to i would.
2006-06-17 21:08:08 · answer #6 · answered by i_love_orange_crush_05 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋