my bf is vry possesive bout me.he doenst allow me to go out of my house not wid my family members also.?

Question

no parties.he doest let me attend my college fuctions.he critices for my looksd fact is m beautiful.l.wat evr he says i do.i thought he might change but he didnt.its been 5 yrs.he also hits me.

if i wana go out i have to seek his permission.he says dat i have a affair wid my cousin.i dnt know wat does he wants frm me.m going thru a rough phase.i sacrifised my aim of bkmig an airhostess,tuk admission in gals colg.i have missed my fairwell n so may parties.my family goes out n i sit at home.he is three years elder to me.i just feel like commitig suicide.i even took sleeping pills but was save.i did evrythin for dis guy to make him happy.i sacrifised my wishes my dreams.he is so abusive,he calls me slut..he is a snob. .my all friends go out n i km back home.in my life i have got may proposals.i have won miss personality in my colg.will he ever change.y does he behaves like dis?even wid d other gal he will behave in a same maner.will he evr realise my worth.i love him so much.

thank you so much guys for helping me out.wen i told him about dis he told smbody has chaged ur mind.u dnt love me anymore.its up to you.he told me to choose either my family or him.i chose my family.he den replied never contact me again.m broken.i have lost my love.but still trying my level best to km out of dis shell.y dis happens wid me only.anyways guys thank you frm d bottom of my heart,may god be wid you always.m obliged.

Answer 1

I think you need to move on, last month! This guy is abusive to you! It doesn't matter how much you love him or how much he says he loves you, he is abusing you and it will only get worse. He is knocking you down, making you feel less worthy than you are and it will result in you thinking that no other guy will ever love you! This guy is a jerk! You are an adult human being, not a baby who needs to ask someone's permission to do anything. Don't try to kill yourself over him, lose him! He is not worth it. Love is not supposed to cause you to want to kill yourself, it is supposed to be releasing, happy, joyful...something to look forward to every day of your life! Not to dread what comes next. Do not sacrifice your dreams, friends, family, hopes and everything else, sacrifice him! He WILL NOT CHANGE! Don't think that he will change for you or because he loves you or because you will help/make him change. Only he can change and only if he wants to. It will get worse and you may end up in the hospital or a morgue. Would you want your children having him dampen all their hopes and dreams? He has wasted enough of your life, let him ruin his own and you begin your life anew. Good luck, PLEASE!

Answer 2

You mispelled that 5th word. It is "abu" not "posse".

Cutting you off from the outside world is a typical pattern in an abusive relationship. Some men have been known to put bars on windows and lock the door from the outside. This makes it easier to control you since no one whispers in your ear that there is a better way to live.

y does he behaves like dis?

Because he is a broken human being, and he has broken you too. You can't fix him, but you can fix yourself.

You need to get out of this controlling and abusive relationship, but since you have already been in it for 5 years, you clearly have your own issues with this. It is not unusual for some people to seek out abusive relationships. There are groups and agencies that will help you if you take the first step of picking up the phone.

Every locale has different facilities and hotlines that can direct you to them.
The page in sources has a pretty good list, but call the national hotline first, and they will help you get to where you need.
1-800-799-SAFE

Listen to them. Do what they say, and reach out to your friends and extended family as soon as you are hidden from this creep. You may need their support to keep you from going back to him!

You are going to need counseling and hard work to break yourself of this, but it is either that or the slow death you are already experiencing.

Call 1-800-799-SAFE now and take the first step back into the life you once had and deserve, and can have again. Please call!

Answer 3

You should really get out of your relationship. Things will only get worse and his possessiveness/abuse will get 100x worse as time goes on - and especially if you get married. Normal people do not need permission to go out anywhere and a normal healthy relationship doesn't work the way you describe yours. You don't deserve to be hit - no one does. Look at your future and see if this is what you want for the rest of your life - and think about any kids you might have.
If you value yourself and love yourself leave this guy while you still can. He is violent and it will only get worse- you don't want him to snap one day and kill you or really hurt you. Talk to your family and arrange to move back home for a while - you need to get away from him. Best of luck, and my prayers are with you.

Answer 4

First of all I am here to tell you this guy will never change and as long as you allow him to treat you this way he will only get worse. Also don't you know never stay with a man that hits you because this will only get worst too. My opinion is to get out and get out fast, no matter how much you love this man you need to love yourself more because he sure doesn't love you if he did he wouldn't treat you like this. He only wants someone he can mistreat and boss around and I think you should get away from his as fast as you can. If I can be of anymore help please e-mail me. I know I have been there before but please do me a favor and get out while you still can because one of these days when he is hitting on you, you may not be lucky enough to get away and he could end up hurting you really bad or even killing you so like I said PLEASE GET OUT FAST WHILE YOU STILL CAN.

Answer 5

RUN don't walk. He is a control freak and will never change. Abuse should not be tolerated by anyone. If you continue to allow it, the abuse will only escalate with unthinkable outcomes. As long as he can keep you from your family and friends, he controls you. My daughter and neice are going through the same. My neice's husband was just arrested for 6 different counts even with a restrainig order and over $10,000 damage to her house

Answer 6

Sweety are you his girl friend or his slave because if you are his girlfrend you need to tell him to get out of your life and dont look back. He is not letting you have any breathing room. what does you faimly think about all of this.Sweety if you were my daughter that guy would have seenn the business end of my shot gun long ago. there are other men out there that will treat you like you need to be treated.go look for one dont stay with this clown. let me know how it goes if you need to talk im on line most of the time. good luck.

Answer 7

don't worry .i know how hard it is when someone you love treating you like this.i had an experience on that.he loves you and so are you.when things doesn't work around,don't give up and look straight.when my ex bf is treating me like a piece of **** i didn't fight him,because at that time my love for him is so much but when he stared to date someone else behind my back(which is lucky for i occupied a spy she told me that b****** is dating someone else.)i stand on my own two feet,and i confronted him.i asked him why all he said is"Why don't you mind your own business."i didn't back up,instead i told him he is just a piece of jerk and i dump him.there is plenty more fish in the sea.just because he is your bf that doesn't mean you can let go all your dreams.he is your bf and i suggest you talk to him let him understand you won't do anything nasty behind his back.BE WISE when you are doing something.don't his possessive attitude controls you.you deserve a life your own.

Answer 8

i read in a psychology book that boys who behave like this suffer from a mental illness of being very possessive. Dump him. And also report to the police. THis is abuse and wrongful confinement. Go girl! You can do it! Any problems, Be strong and carry on! This is your life! Not his! He can stay home if he wants to. I'll be rallying behind you!!!!!!!

Answer 9

How can you love someone who beats on you? You have the hope of fixing him and that is not your responsibility. He has problems that is beyond your ability and you need to think about your safety. No one deserves to be beat on. He has no rights to you what so ever. What is keeping you there? Move on. Find someone who will take care of you not use you as a door mat. That is not love honey.

Answer 10

girl let me talk to you for a hot second you need to get away from that man before he ends up hurting you or your dead. He is trying to control you . What you need to do is pick something up and buss him upside his damn head and knock his *** the hell out and get away from him as soon as you can. Men like that don't love women they hurt they want to feel like they have control over them. Momma love is not suppose to feel this way. It's not supposed to hurt. If he is doing this to you know imagine how it would be if you stay in this situation. Just me telling you this isn't going to help you, you have to have the will power to help your self and know that you are worth more than that and you deserve a good man to treat you right. Trust me I know that I'm not going to let no man do that to me there are just too many objects in the house to be letting things like that to be happening to me. (Hint) pickup a knife our something and stab his *** I'm pretty sure the police would understand that you were fearing for life. I'm just telling you to be strong and trust in God and he will see you throght. Don't forget FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT for your life. Love ya!