There is a guy at work that really likes me, he told me so himself. I get a run to and from work with him. I already have a bf who lives 2000 km away, and I have no feelings toward this guy other than friendship. He knows I have a bf, and is always saying to me that my bf and I aren't gonna last. My bf and I plan to marry and he knows this as well. He is always stopping by my place, wanting me to go places with him, and asking me to go out and do things. I went to the lake with him today, he takes his dog there, but that's the only thing I ever did with him. How can I tell him to back off, without being mean?
2006-06-17 15:00:55 · 29 answers · asked by angel_girl2248 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have told him that I will never like him more than as a friend, and I told my bf, and he said he's gonna beat the crap outta him, but he can't come till December.
2006-06-17 15:05:09 · update #1
Be mean if you have to. Just be blunt at first. If that does not work be mean. And if you elect to do things with this guy don't complain when it seems things are getting out of hand. You already know he likes you too much.
2006-06-17 15:05:38 · answer #1 · answered by martin b 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm going to be honest, there is no simple way to tell a guy to back off. If he is your friend, you need to tell him you appreciate him, but that you have a commitment to you bf, and that if he was your bf and there was someone who was doing the same thing as he was, he would want you to be committed. You need to make him see from your side, but at the same time you need to look at the scene from his view. Also, tell him if you ever broke up with your bf, you would certainly give him a chance. I think if you talked to him straight forward, he would appreciate that. Good luck!
2006-06-17 15:06:40 · answer #2 · answered by sarboo3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T go anywhere wit hikm nomore. Tat's kind of a sign 2 men tat ur interested if u go somwhere wit them. As 4 u and ur b/f keep goin' wit him. Don't listen 2 the other guy. He's tring 2 messup ur relationship just cause he likes u. Trust me he sounds desprate. He might do something 2 u if u not carful.
2006-06-17 15:07:51 · answer #3 · answered by JoJo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Holy jeeez! Are you serious?
You say want this guy to back off, but you ride in his car every day, he stops by to visit you often, AND today you go on a date with him??? (yes, dear, you agreeing to go to the lake with him and his dog is a real date!)
Doesn't sound like you REALY want this guy to "back off," huh?
If you do, then you're definitely giving him the WRONG SIGNALS, which is why he continues to pursue you.
C'mon, babe....you're not THAT dumb, are you?? LOL!!
Listen, either stop ALL CONTACT with this guy IF it's really what you want, OR forget your boyfriend and go out with this guy. You hurt your boyfriend, OR you hurt this guy.....your choice.....you can't spare both their feelings, so choose your man....or choose neither!
2006-06-17 15:14:16 · answer #4 · answered by Pulse 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him to please stop. To tell you the truth sometimes you have to be absolutly brutal to some guys who wont leave you alone, you might have to be mean I know you do not want to hurt his feelings but if he was your friend he would be happy for you and your boyfriend and not telling you it isnt going to last. Instead he should be supporting no matter how much he likes you because that is what a real friend would do.
2006-06-17 15:04:58 · answer #5 · answered by Idiotman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the more time you spend with him the more his feeling are going to grow for you, you need to tell him right out that you only want him as a friend and if he can't except that, then you need to put some distance between you.
2006-06-17 15:14:24 · answer #6 · answered by sunshine_sidekick 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could try just being friends with the guy. Just because you both like to walk around lakes with his dog doesn't mean you have to sleep with him!
2006-06-17 15:03:56 · answer #7 · answered by Gabby_Gabby_Purrsalot 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Its like this...either you back off or we can't be friends. I don't want to be mean and hurt your feelings, but if you really care for me, you would respect my wishes. I love my man and there is nothing you or anyone can do to break us apart. I'm sorry. I do want to be your friend, though. Please don't take this the wrong way. I just value your friendship too much."
2006-06-17 15:12:40 · answer #8 · answered by Manda Bear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say no. Do not go to the lake, or running with him. Find someone else to hang with. Think of some excuses and use them.
2006-06-17 15:03:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If i was you I would say :
It's not that you're a bad guy or any thing but I 'm not interested. May be if it was under different circumstances and at a different time I would say yes, but not now and plus I value your friendship.
2006-06-17 15:12:54 · answer #10 · answered by Victoria J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋