i have 2 brothers 3 sisters and with me its 6 kids in the family...the thing me and my sis have a different dad than my brother chris have another dad and the last three kids are fromthis guy i called dad for the last 17 years of my life..............the thing is that my mother doesnt know we know that my dad aint my real dad.......the thing is that my aunt told me about a year ago that her husband brother was my dad...well its weird cause all i want is for my mother to come out with the truth she always tries to play it off cause i dont look like my dad or my other brothers and im always asking her about it but she changes the subject........im old enough to know what really happen but it seems that she cant come with the truth...i know the truth...i kinda know im black mixed with mexican and my dad full mexican and the rest of the family mexican and i dont know that i was different cause i was different with my sis but i saw my birth certificate and it said african american.....
2006-06-17 13:47:25 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
and i got a different last name as the rest of the familia. my last name lincon and my brothers is sanchez how weird i just want my mother to tell me the truth what should i do?
2006-06-17 13:48:54 · update #1
Go through your stepdad and with him backing you up, speak to your mom...
2006-06-17 13:51:57 · answer #1 · answered by kitt 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am not one to discount the "back door method" of finding out information. In this instance, however, you deserve a "front door" answer. Privately ask your mother if she will go with you to a park or some nice outdoor setting. (That way, you are away from the scrutiny of everyone else in the household.)
Make sure you take some bottles of water and maybe some snacks or something. Be clear-headed, when you intiate this conversation. Try not to be fueled by anger or resentment.
Make sure that when you start, you are sitting and facing each other--eye to eye. Then, calmly tell your mother that you know that you have a different father. Tell her that you believe you are mature enough to be told and to understand the facts, and that you believe you have a right to know this information. Be very clear and concise in how you word it and what you are asking her. Very clearly ask your questions, and allow her the time to answer. Be firm, but patient and loving.
Also, and most importantly, be prepared for the answer that she gives you. She may have her reasons for withholding it from you. Of course, she may have withheld it because she doesn't think you're mature enough. Or perhaps she never intended for you to find out. Keep in mind that, out of respect to the man you've been calling "Dad" who has been raising you, she may have wanted you to believe that you were also his child. She may have shame, and therefore, try to be compassionate and understanding. Your mom is a human being with her own feelings and faults.
Just be ready for what you hear, and then don't be too rash in how you respond to it, if she tells you the truth. Really soul-search before you make any decisions about taking any kind of action.
I feel for you, as you are in an unenviable position. God bless you, as you pursue this course. Just realize that God doesn't make mistakes, people do. We, however, have the ability to forgive. :)
2006-06-17 21:23:12 · answer #2 · answered by Ancespiration 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why bring up something of your mother's past now.
She doesn't want to talk about it. Maybe she was hurt,
emotionally, and doesn't want to relief the past.
Your aunt should not have told you unless she asked
your Mom to do so. Be mature about this situation.
Now that you know the truth, according to your aunt, let it rest.
Do not cause problems where they should not be any.
Your Mom has plenty ot them with 6 children.
Go give her a big hug and tell you love her, no matter what.
She is your Mom after all.
2006-06-17 21:01:37 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u noe, i could predict this iz a difficult thing, but i hav an idea. take ur mum to a room, close the door and really, have a talk with her. i noe this may sound nerve-wracking, but this MAY work. tell her that u realli wanna noe the truth and tell her DON'T change the subject. the secret iz not 2 get mad and try and keep this peaceful. i hope u'll have ur mom tell u the story from her perspective!
2006-06-17 20:53:56 · answer #4 · answered by Little J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you know the truth and you would really if she would stop playing it off and show her that you is old and mature enogh to handle it and dont make her feel like what she did was horriable cause we are not all perfect.
2006-06-17 20:55:35 · answer #5 · answered by cookinglovingfootball 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit her down at a time when just you and her have time to communicate with no one else around. Tell her that you know that you have a different father. If you do this without recriminations, then she will probably talk to you. Do not get angry. Talk to her as a friend. Be honest.
2006-06-17 20:53:27 · answer #6 · answered by ginaforu5448 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a serious talk with ur mother if u really want her to know that u know the truth or if it really doesnt matter to u whether or not she knows, then just dont bring it up again. good luck with everything!!=)
2006-06-17 20:53:01 · answer #7 · answered by tash 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think i would gently tell her that you know that you have a different father, and that you would like to know the truth about who he is and what happened to him and then see what she says. just know that it may be a painfil subject for her.
2006-06-17 20:53:34 · answer #8 · answered by Tate 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your mom that you know the truth and you want her to explain it to you....she can't run away from that....but be nice to her when you tell her that, and be understanding after the story ends...i hope this helps!
2006-06-17 22:33:31 · answer #9 · answered by blue_bee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When no one else is around
Just nicely tell her that u know
2006-06-17 22:45:41 · answer #10 · answered by Nick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋