I know this young lady. who's getting out of an abusive marriage. We have been friends and alittle more. i have reacted badly to her situation saying thing i would not normally. Now she want space, doesn't contact me yet want to start fresh later?
2006-06-17 12:45:58 · 20 answers · asked by sns 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well first of all, I do not believe you or anyone says anything they do not mean at least at the time they are said. and in saying that i would think an honest approach would work wonders. You can say what it really is and say i am sorry for the things I said and I did mean them but I was not thinking clearly and not giving your side of things enough thought before speaking my mind. I don't want something like words to come between us, you mean far more to me that any words spoken. I was wrong and I am willing to take responsibility for my words and my actions and hopefully I have learned from my own mistakes and a repeat of the damage I have done will never happen again.
or something along that line
2006-06-17 12:52:24 · answer #1 · answered by Savage 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you could do is give her some space. In future, you could try not to be the "Rescuer" as this seldom works and will end up causing you all kinds of grief, and possibly lose what friendship you have with her. She needs to decide on her own, and you need to look for someone who has all kinds of problems and will likely bring all sorts of baggage into what relationship you may have. How about just being her friend, as surely she needs that more that anything, and that means not being judgmental.
2006-06-17 12:49:49 · answer #2 · answered by Crowfeather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think Ive got a good out for you, which is true and worked for me;
Admit that you are human, and that your Brain controls your mouth and what you say.
But also say, that the brain is composed of wires, that sometimes get crossed and short-circuit or tap into wrong other parts of the brain.
So admit that your brain is not perfect, and did not say all of how you feel.
Then ask if you can say more, and try to say it better, this time.
I bet she'll forgive you.
And listen. Women often don't care so much what you say, as that you are willing to keep talking. NEVER SHUT UP at a woman. She needs your talk, as if it were Food. As long as it's about HER.
2006-06-17 12:58:40 · answer #3 · answered by DinDjinn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her time, but don't give up. It takes a long time to get over an abusive relationship. Sometimes the women go back time after time after time before they can really escape. Let her know you are there to support her, no matter what decision she makes. If she makes a bad one, stand behind her. Eventually, she will get the message, and if she is worth having, she is worth waiting for!
2006-06-17 12:53:57 · answer #4 · answered by Rainbow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say sorry for things you don't mean by not saying them but apologizing for it anyway. If you don't mean it, don't say it. I don't care how mad or angry you might get, never say things to anyone that you don't mean. If you cannot control your anger, then get away from the situation until you can think straight. I'm not perfect, I used to be that way, but I've learned that if I can't speak rationally, then I will wait until I can, then have a discussion.
2006-06-17 12:50:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's call woman to woman and just let her know that you really didn't mean the things you said to out of madness .is there anyway she can find it in her heart to forgive you,and start the friendship over she would say yes if she was really a true friend.
2006-06-17 12:52:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you I would have kept my mouth shut to begin with. And I don't think there is a clean fresh start after you say hurtful things.
All they will ever remember is how you couldn't contain yourself...-shrugs-
It sucks, when you can't think before you speak...
2006-06-17 12:52:42 · answer #7 · answered by ~Sinfully~Exquisite~Stalking~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is to give her the space, but let her know you will be there if she wants or needs you
2006-06-17 12:48:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For peace of mind I would apologize and let her know I was sorry. It's up to her to forgive. Then just sit back and wait. If she don't ever call then she was really neveryour freind.
2006-06-17 12:49:40 · answer #9 · answered by Debbie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
an easy way....go to the store and pick a really good "im sorry" card...there are so many...add a personal note..like i miss you...and mail it.!
or...send a bouquet of flowers...with the note stating your sorry for being a jerk...she will agree with that ..but she will smile.
good luck
2006-06-17 12:52:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋