What to do when you don't agree with your parents and they will not take the time to listen to you?

Question

Specifally, my mom and I don't get along. I'm am the youngest of three kids so there is a little over thirty years between us. We have fought with each other for most of my childhood. The problem is she never wants to listen to my opinions or thoughts...she is either too busy or says she doesn't care. Sometimes my dad is just there and doesn't really listen to the situation. He forgets important events in my life and doesn't ask about my personal life. What do I do?

Answer 1

i haven't talked to mine in over a year... just ignore them, they'll come around...in a few years....

Answer 2

That is usually a difficult situation to deal with, however, I have learn't that people tend to listen to you when you develop a genuine interest in their world. Agreeing or disagreeing is not the most important thing. Building a relationship comes first.

Remember, though, that a relationship takes two sides. Just do your part and hopefully your parents will reciprocate the positive attention. But be prepared to face the worst. I don't mean to imply that the relationship is bad; it is a simple fact of life listening is a component of good relationships.

The bottom line is, focus on building a solid relationship and then it will be easier for them to listen to you.

Answer 3

Have a meeting with your mom and dad together, just the 3 of you. Tell them that you need to talk to them about you and them. Write things down so that u don't forget what u would like to talk about to them. Remember, talk and listen, have patients, and remember respect your parents as you would want to be respected. Don't start screaming, yelling, running out of the room. Talk as adults to adults. Don't expect to get everything you want depending on your age. Weigh both sides of everything. Remember, relax and enjoy the age you are at and don't hurry everything. Life goes fast enough, stop and smell the roses. Your mom and dad really love you and just want the best for you. Good Luck and remember, 1 day at a time.

Answer 4

Go to a family member you respect and you KNOW respects you. Talk with them. Don't whine about your parents not listening to you, they will understand that already. Because they are family and an adult they will already have a good idea what is going on. If at ANY time anything makes you feel uncomfortable about them STOP and leave.

When I couldn't talk to my family I had a aunt that was really good at keeping her mouth shut. She always had good ideas and allowed me to express my opinions. I could talk to her about anything and she would not be judgmental. She gave me tips on how to approach my mom and dad. How to deal with stress, school, lots of things. She sorta became a surrogate mom and I really missed her when she died.

Everyone needs someone to confide in and help balance your life. Sometimes the ones who are supposed to help you, can't for some reason unknown to you and sometimes them.

If you can't find anyone you feel safe discussing things with, talk to your minister or a school counselor. Good Luck and Take Care.

Answer 5

you need to be more specific on what you and your parents dont agree on....i did not agree with my parents all the time ...but depending on your age which i dont know just go with the flow and enjoy your young years. if you have good parents youll understand in the future where they are coming from.
trust me im still learning from my parents at 42 years old
write them a letter if you can... if you cant tell them in person why they are not listening I'm sorry I missed the additional details on your situation. I overlooked them somehow. but either way I wish you all the luck in the world.
God Bless

Answer 6

Well depends on the issue. What are they not listening to you about. If you are trying to discuss something that your parents are formally against then you shouldn't even bother but if its really something you need to talk about then get them at the moment they can't leave. Talk to your mom while she's in the kitchen making dinner. She can't just leave it unattended so she'll be forced to stay and she can pretend like she isn't listening but you'll get through to her. Go talk to them at a time of relaxation. I always used to go in and talk to my mom while she was reading. Make sure you have your end of the conversation planned out. You don't want to go and have a conversation that you really care about and not be prepared. Get your facts straight. If it's something that you can get some information about then look it up. Odds are in favor of you if you are prepared. And lastly just be confident, it's just like talking to an audience if you show falter they'll see your weakness and use it against you. Good Luck!

Answer 7

Well I'm sorry you feel that way but what I think you should do is email this to your parents because maybe they'll understand that your hurting over this matter b/c your asking for help over the Web. And if you can't do that then tell someone that you know can help ar someone that you know your parents will listen too. Like grandparents, aunts, uncle, Parents friends this can be fix you just got to think like them.

Answer 8

OK, this is what you do. start leaving notes for them, tell them how you feel. but if you are going to leave them note make sure you leave not only your ideas but also your love on them. yo should just leave an "I love you" note in the bathroom, an "I have an idea, what do you think?" note in the kitchen. some where they will find it. on the TV, computer front door, or even on there pillow. maybe if you start communicating that way they will see that you are reaching out to them and do the same for them. I see it as nothing loss if you don't try, and nothing loss if nothing happens. but i do believe that something will happen and it will be a good thing.

Answer 9

Wish I had better words of wisdom for you... My father died when I was 15, and my mother and I have had an on/off relationship (most of which is BAD) since then. I'm moving to Germany in two months and will be there 3 years. She's already said she won't fly to see me, or my granddaughter because she's afraid to fly. (lame excuse.) ALWAYS excuses... I suggest writing them the letter to get all you feelings out... and then give them some time and distance and see if they come to you.

Answer 10

You need to tell them they need to make time to listen to you. Parents should always have time to listen to their kids. If they have told you something you don't agree with then you need to respect their decision. Keep in mind that your parents have a lot of life experience and they understand a lot of things that you don't. Respect what they say and if you don't agree then ask them to explain it to you so maybe you can understand.

Answer 11

Have you tried leaving them notes? Your mother will NOT listen to you if you argue with her. She is your mom. Ask her to take a walk with you, maybe then you can express some of your emotions to her then. My Daughter and I have night time talks, we sit on my waterbed and I listen to her, and give my opinion on things that she needs opinions on. My husband is real good about leaving us to these talks, he knows how difficult teenage and pre-teen years are.