Are parents scared of spanking their children these days?

Question

I said spanking not abusing. There's a difference. It amamzes me whn I see kids yelling back and cursing out their parents> What would your parents have done if that was you?

Answer 1

Time out??? are you kidding? that dosn't work.I don't care what anyone says. I was raise that if I did anything wrong I was punished in the form of spanking. I was spanked and let me tell you, I am very respectful to my parents. Now that i am a parent I understand what they went through with me and I would've laughed in there face if they told me to sit in time out. Children need to be taught that there a CONSQUENCES to their actions and decisions and to me, time out is not a consequence. I'm not afraid to spank my kids and I don't care who knows that I spank them. I don't go around hitting them all day every day but they do get a warning and If the bad behavior continues I will not hesitate to swat them on the behind. I will swat my kid on the behind in the store too for misbehaving. I dare someone to say something. MY KIDS will not be running over me and disrespecting me in public or at home. I do believe that there is a difference between spanking and physical abuse. The line is very thin though. My kids don't go around with bruises but they do have respect for others and thier parents. I think it all depends on how you were raised. I don't have disrespectful and rebellious kids. I feel that because of the discipline techniques I have chosen my kids are becoming well rounded individuals with boundries. You certainly won't find me standing in the middle of the grocery store being talked back to and cursed out my my own children.

Answer 2

Yes, people are afraid to spank, or even try to correct their children. You'll always find someone who gets their undies in a bunch over your treatment of your child, even if you put them in the corner. Well, you're bruising their poor ego, or damaging their young psyche, turning them into...kids who respect their elders. Who'd want that? Yes, there IS a difference between abuse and spanking. I only spanked my kids when absolutely necessary, and then I'd speak to them before & after. I never liked doing it, but they knew that it was only as a last resort. And now they're well rounded, respectful adults. Unfortunately, many parents are afraid of being fined, jailed or both, so do nothing. That's why kids are doing what they're doing, talking back and doing whatever they want. They know they have their parents over a barrel. I know a family who is going through great difficulty right now with their boys. One is an adult and they're still having problems. The cops told them that if they spanked the boys, the parents would be put in jail. These boys NEEDED spanking. Now, they're all in trouble, in and out of jail (more in than out). The adult wants to make every female pregnant that he can get his hands on. He thinks it's cool! The middle boy likes to steal stuff. The younger one (15) likes to punch walls & people too. And they can't do a thing. The boys skip school and the parents get fined. The parents can't keep them in school, so they get fined a lot. Now my parents, well that's a different story. I was afraid to mess up 'cause I knew I'd get the belt on my bottom. And it was never in anger. It was always to correct my behavior and only 2 swats. But it was effective. I never talked back and never got in trouble. I wouldn't consider myself as having been abused. Abuse would have been if my parents let me do as I pleased. The abuse you hear about now goes beyond spanking, and that's not acceptable. Cigarette burns, hot liquids and anything else that could disfigure is totally unacceptable. Neither is locking them into a closet or starving them into submission. Correction comes from the heart, not from anger. A parent who corrects their child loves their child and doesn't want to release a hooligan on the world. You teach your kids manners, right. Why not teach him respect? And for some kids, that might have to include some pain. What kid hasn't learned that playing with fire is dangerous and can hurt? This question has been put up here before. Some were very angry that the asker thought spanking was an acceptable method of correction. Maybe for them, spanking wasn't needed. God bless them & their children. But some kids need it. It's the only thing that turns them around and makes them realize their actions have consequences. Of course, there is an age that spanking doesn't work anymore and you have to resort to other methods, like grounding and taking priviledges away. I guess this is one of those opinion questions where everyone will have their ideal answer. I hope the ones that have the answers also have children that they're raising in the fashion that they're supporting. Otherwise, how can they say what works and what doesn't? <*)))><

Answer 3

I think most parents are cautious about spanking, especially in public. My answer will not be popular on this board, I can already tell, but sometimes you have to take a stand. The Bible says, to spare the rod is to spoil the child. I do not believe that meant to beat your kids, but to chasten them when they have done wrong. I think most parents take that too far and hit their kids when they are angry. That isn't appropriate and it's not what the Bible is telling us to do. A child needs boundaries and to feel protected - if you put them on an even playing field with you as the parent, you are making a huge mistake, imo. Most kids do not have the emotional intellect to interpret what's best for them, as the parent does, and to have what some might call "mutual respect" for one another is silly. I DO believe that you should love and respect your kids (the Bible teaches that too), but not on the same level as you would your spouse...they are yours to protect, not to be your best friend, etc. My parents would have NEVER considered confiding in me regarding their financial situation, their marital struggles, my siblings, or anything else like that. They DID spank me occasionally, but it was never in anger and always with the understanding that it was because I had violated a rule or had done something wrong. And by the way, I didn't ever try the yelling thing with my parents because the boundaries had been set from the time I was small, and I knew what the consequences would have been.

Answer 4

I guess some are scared because there might be that one person hiding in the dairy aisle that saw you slap your kid's hand and will call "the people" on you. When I was younger, I got spanked. Not a lot though and not for any reason. First, I got "the look", then if I was still acting up, then I got taken into the bathroom of whatever store we were in. There are times, though, when I think a spanking isn't called for and another form of discipline will make due. Then there are the times when I think the kid needs a swat to the butt. I'm not going to count to 3 or whatever if my kid's breaking stuff and cussing in the grocery store.

Answer 5

I am against spanking and alot of parents use this because it is quick, easy and a lazy form of discipline. This doesn't mean I let my kids rule my house or let them misbehave. I just have more effective techniques that work for us. We use time out and taking away priviledges. I always follow through with an explanation and teach my children how to work out the problem. My children are well behaved and we get compliments on their behavior. It doesn't surprise me to see kids yelling and swearing at their parents. Does that mean that every one of these parents don't spank or are scared to? Definitely check out the site below. It is so great.

Answer 6

Spanking is no longer socially acceptable. Do you know what would happen if you spanked a child in public??? You would have the entire grocery store/post office/doctor's office on top of you in three seconds flat.

Besides, I use time-outs with my 2 yr old and it is very effective if you do it correctly. There are plenty of ways to discipline other than spanking. It's just that many parents let their kids do whatever they want, there is a happy medium between spanking and letting your child run wild.

Answer 7

It's not so much spanking as it is a lack of understanding between kids and adults. The whole 'respect your elders' thing has gone out the window, because parents tell their kids that they are the most important thing to them. As a 17 year old, I've had plenty of experience with my parents, and I try to treat them with the same respect they treat me with. If there is a mutual respect, there shouldn't be a problem. Spanking tells kids that they don't respect them. They only problem with respect, however, is that some kids will take a mile if you give them that inch. Bottom line, don't spank, take video games away.

Answer 8

I would be- I'm not a parent, but sometimes, I'm even afraid to hug/comfort a child that is crying (OOOH- "statutory rape")!!

"Discipline" comes from "disciple" To discipline (to me) means to teach. Parents have a lot of tools to teach their children- lecture, time out, corporal punishment, loss of privelages and freedoms, "community service", etc. (As a non-parent, I may be speaking through my back side, but I am observant...) I think that when corporal punishment is required, love needs to be included- if not, THEN it's abuse.

When I was a kid, I was afraid to even use cuss words- When I was 3 or 4, something happend and my dad said "S***t!" The next day or so, I used the word, and my mom was all sorts of mad. I asked why it was wrong- Daddy said it... She still washed my mouth out with soap.

I'm a total advocate of parents' rights, and I think that the obsession with coddling children has been carried too far. Part of a parent's job is to teach their kids to be good citizens, and the laws have completely hobbled them, not given them the freedom to do the job.

One of the worst things a parent can do is not teach their child to obey rules. As an adult, I have rules I have to follow, and if I don't follow them there are consequences (tickets, fines, jail time, etc)

I know a woman who had to call the police on one of her sons (she has 2 sons, 3 daughters). He'd made some choices she didn't agree with, didn't condone. These choices also happened to be illegal. As the police were taking him out to the car, one of the officers said to her, "Somebody shoulda taken him over their knee..." She replied, "I would, but then you'd arrest me." The officer didn't say anything in response.

As a future parent, I plan to pay my kids for good behavior in public. (Bribery comes before-- payment comes after.) "If you're good at the grocery store, we'll stop for ice cream on the way home- no crying, begging, etc."

BTW- tallgirltexas-- Way to go, Girl!!!

Answer 9

Some parents may be scared to spank their child, but I'm not. I'm a firm believer in spanking. I'm saying spanking, not abusing.. There is a right way and a wrong way to spank your child. I know you can't spank a foster child in your care, but if the child is yours and your not abusing it, then you can spank. I'm not sure if I'm right about that or not, but that's what I've heard. If I yelled at my parents or cussed at them when I was young, they wouldn't think twice about slapping me in the month. That was along time ago when I was young..

Answer 10

OK my dad use to always say that he wouldn't be embarrassed to spank me in public but i would be embarrassed to be on the receiving side of one! i believe the same thing my child is 2 and recently i have applied the switch to the equation and amazingly i only had to spank her 3 or 4 times with it before she got the point mommy is not playing now all i have to do is put the switch in plain sight and she minds very well im sure this will change with time but i have also noticed it applies to a child's ego more than physically hurting them