What AGE is old enough to have a baby?

Question

I just keep hearing about people being too young, but if you are 19, 21, 22, (over 18) and married, and financially able, what age is finally socially acceptable, or is it based more upon the circumstances of the girl than the age? What do you think? I'm 21 (almost 22) and engaged, and even though I am TRULY, finally an adult now, I still feel as people make me feel as though I am too young. (No I am not thinking about starting a family, I just want to know other's opinions).

Answer 1

I think it depends on the person and the situation. i think the parents need to be emotionally and financially ready, like you said.

i think that some people say 21, 22, etc is still too young, b/c they themselves weren't ready when they were that age and couldn't imagine having kids at that age.
i personally am 26 and pregnant and it was a "surprise" for my husband and i. of course, we are very happy about it, but i would have liked to wait a little longer...that's just me, though.
a good friend of mine is 25 and she has a 6, 3 and 1 year old. when i found out she was younger than me with all those kids i was shocked!!
i couldn't even imagine being her!
but, she said that her life is so fulfilled by her kids that she wouldn't want it any other way. she is one of those women who feel completed by having a family and kids.
for me, there's so much that i want out of life that family and kids is a chunk of it, but not all.

so, i think it's all about the person, not the age.
my friend is a great mom! i hope to be too!

take care! and congrats on finding that special guy!

P.S. one bit of advice....give yourselves some time to enjoy each other before getting pregnant. marriage can be tough at first, even if you've been dating awhile. it adds a new dynamic to the situation. so, give yourselves some time to be just with each other.

Answer 2

I am 21 (about to be 22), a newlywed, financially stable, and my husband & I are ready to start a family. We really wanted to spend the first year of our marriage just being with each other and then start trying for a baby. BUT, we're ready at any time so we're not "trying" but not preventing it either!!
I truthfully don't think the age matters as much as what kind of situation you are in. I think that it also depends on what you and your future husband want. You both need to talk about it and make a decision together, because a baby could have an impact on your relationship. I've seen a friend go behind her husband's back and quit taking her birth control because SHE wanted a baby, when they weren't finacially stable enough. Of course the husband wouldn't trade the baby for the world but he wasn't ready at the time. And another older friend of mine that let her two children get in between her & her husband and eventually resulted in a divorce. So planning to have a baby can be a big decision. I'm sure you'll make the right decision and I hope everything works out for you. Don't worry about what other people think. As long as you & your husband are stable & happy that's ALL that matters.

Answer 3

18 or 19

Answer 4

well, I'm 20 and have 2 daughters. I had my oldest at 18 and my youngest at 19. I love my girls and dont regret them at all. But I still think that 18 is too young to have a baby. Neither of mine were planned, I was on birth control with both of them. I think it had something to do with their father and I being too fertile. We weren't financially ready at all but we're making it. I say that once you have a house (not an apartment), good vehicle, great insurance through a great paying job, and you have the emotional ability to deal with a child then you are ready. But like someone else said, I see people that wait to have kids and they're some of those people I give a quote to that goes "Stupid people shouldnt breed" My neighbor's daughter for example, lady was in her 40's had 5 kids, and those kids live with their grandmother who is in her 60s. And why does everyone think you have to be married to have children? I'm not married, but engaged and my fiance (children's father) and I are in no hurry to be married. We're happy how we are. A man and a woman could be married and fight all the time. That isnt good for a child. I think as long as you're in a COMMITTED relationship, things work out good.

Answer 5

if you've already graduated college and have started your career and have a good amount of money saved then your prolly ready if you think your adult enough to take care of a child. i am 20 and have a 7 month old...i only got a year of college in and right now i cant work bc there is no child care where i live and i have no friends or family here. i also have not had any kind of break from my baby since february when i visited my family last. which means ive been with him 24/7 since then....i would say 25 would be the age i would choose to have a baby...this way id be done with college...started a career and had some time to play. i miss going out...being couped up 24/7 can really get to you.

Answer 6

I think the social acceptance factor pertains mostly to the woman's circumstances. For example, if a woman is married at 19, graduated, is married and is financially stable, then it is more sociallly acceptable than a woman who is 26, living with her parents, doesn't work, has no schooling and no job and no steady boyfriend.

For me, I'm 23, happily married and we live comfortably and feel we're ready to start a family. My mom tells me to wait until I'm older, that I'm too young now, but my husband and I want to start a family when we're young. Also, I have a great job, but I want to have my children and stay home with them. I wouldn't want to leave work when I'm in a manager or exec position to do this (although I would if it worked out this way). I think its a personal choice that every married couple/woman has to make for herself.

There are less health risks to the mother and baby, when she has children under 35, you don't have to leave your career right in the height of it, and young mothers are (sometimes) more energetic.

So, I hope this helps, but in the long run, whatever works for you and your future husband is fine!

Answer 7

18

Answer 8

It's not about age, it's about maturity. My son was born when I was 20 and I'm pregnant again and I'm due a little more than 3 weeks before my 22nd birthday.
I'm married to the most amazing man. We are financially stable. My husband is in the Marines and I was in the Navy when our son was born but got out to stay at home with him. Yea, we can't buy whatever we want but we don't worry about bills and we're able to save a good bit. We own our own home. How many 21 year-olds can say that? We don't go out to clubs or bars. We love nothing more than staying at home and playing with our son. I don't believe many people are age are ready but there are some of us that are.

Answer 9

I agree thats its too young. I think being married at 22 is on the young side too. You actually will do alot of growing and changing mentally and emotionally in the next few years.

When I was 22, I was dating. I went out with friends, did some traveling and had fun. You wont have the freedom to do these things as easily once you have kids.

Answer 10

I don't think you're ever gong to please everyone. If you wait to long, people will jump on you for being too old to start a family, etc.
I think honestly, there are a lot of factors as far asbeing ready. One, statistics show you should be over 21 (male) and 19 (female) before settling down for marriage...and you need to be ready for kids after that because they change a marriage into a family and that can be tough. I say just do it in your own timing, ignore the doubting Thomases and seek out people who support you in those decisions.