I tried to hook up with my old boyfriend. I was actually his first girlfriend, years ago, and he said it took a long time to get over me. So now it's years later, and I make the move and he rejects me. But it was like, yes, no, yes, no and ended awkwardly in bed--and not in a fulfilling way. We have a lot in common and get along great, but he won't have sex with me and can't seem to say why. I don't think it's because of how I look. We've been emailing, but he never answers any questions seriously. Should I just let this go?
2006-06-16 02:23:33 · 17 answers · asked by i'mjustsayin' 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if the guy is not answering your questions, and keeps changing the subject when it comes up, then usually it means that he doesn't want to say the wrong thing and
A.) get himself into a relationship that he really did not want,
B.) Likes where you are now, and doesn't want to jeapordize it by turning it in a different direction,
C.) likes knowing that you are his fall back girl, you know the one who will be there if this other girl doesn't work out. (not saying he has another girl, but if one would come along, he wouldn't want to be tied down.)and,
D.) Goes along with C He doesn't want to get serious and be tied down when there may come along someone else he may be more interested in, and wouldn't want to hurt you , as his friend.
Personally, I'd leave things as they are, don't push him, but don't give up entirely either. Who knows it may work out in the end. If he loves you he'll let you know in his time, when he's ready. I know it's hard, waiting, but go out with other people, and keep it casual let him know your interested, but that your also open to new relationships. If you don't at least see other people your telling him that your basically his and he can play whatever game he wants, and it's going to tear your heart in peices. My daughter is going through this same thing, and I've basically told her the same thing, As a guy I played these games, and didn't see the other side of the story, as a father, I see the hurt and pain that girls feel, and I really hate the way I treated ALOT of my ex's. So I say DATE other guys send a message, you can have me, if you want me, BUT, I will not be your play thing, and I will move on. If he loves you, then he'll get the point, and make his move, if he's stringing you along, then he won't care what you do , and you don't need that anyway.
Hope this helps you in any way at least you have a view from a guys point of view this is how we are. Assholes. Sorry for that, NOW, but back then ... well you get the point. Anyway good luck and be safe.
2006-06-16 03:04:07 · answer #1 · answered by knightquest07041967 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Reignite old flame is always tricky and difficult, because both of you is carrying the past experiences when evaluating what the future will hold. It might be more difficult for him since he actually took the time and effort to get over you, which sets a emotional block in getting back with you.
A good relationship should always be build on concrete ground, like common interest, good personality and respect. It seems you guys have all of those in play here, it might be wise to start out slowly with just dating and get the feeling back instead of jumping in bed.
Intimate encounter in bed without a solid relationship can only hurt your cause, because it downplay your character and shows how desperate you are at getting back with him.
If your old boyfriend is having mix feeling about getting back with you, you shouldn't push the issue. Take it easy with him, go on a couple of dates and let the enjoyment of your company speak for yourself, if you guys are so wonderful together then it shouldn't take too long for him to take the next step.
2006-06-16 02:36:23 · answer #2 · answered by thsiung 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely, you should let him go. He is unwilling to revisit a relationship with you and is not expressing any interest. Date others and be well. Examine why you would like to rekindle with this particular guy. Perhaps you need to grieve the ending of the relationship and achieve closure, so that you are ready to love again.
2006-06-16 03:15:18 · answer #3 · answered by marsvenusgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He does not trust u for a serious relationship and he knows that same story may be repeated. Do u know it takes really long to get over from rejection or relationship? So he is avoid things.
2006-06-16 02:29:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's keeping you on a string. Maybe he's with someone else and doesn't want you to know until he's sure what he wants to do. Don't waste your time, there are plenty of great men out there - just stop looking and he'll show up.
2006-06-16 02:26:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's got a reason for not wanting to hook up, but doesn't want to hurt your feelings so he can't tell you. Let him go and move on.
2006-06-16 02:29:15 · answer #6 · answered by stacey797 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I would. He probably thinks it isn't worth going back to the past. Move on.....and stay friends.
2006-06-16 02:27:01 · answer #7 · answered by butterfliesRfree 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes we ask for advice when we know the answer but wish we didn't. you know you need to let it go and move on.
2006-06-16 02:28:10 · answer #8 · answered by rayhanna 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you bf's brother used to or nevertheless likes you and ur bf feels threaten through it so he dont choose yall speaking. yet your bf's brother is concered about yall courting as acquaintances. u could ask your bf why he doesnt choose yall speaking
2016-10-30 23:55:17 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should let it go ,he seems not interested but may he wanted to be sure of his feelings
2006-06-16 02:29:08 · answer #10 · answered by zenadonia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋