Would you believe your child over your spouse?

Question

Let's say your child can home and told you that your spouse touched them in a bad way or made your child touch your spouse

I will always believe my children over any man that is in my life. I asked the question because so many women chose their man over their child.

Answer 1

Unless my child had a huge history of lying and fantasy and unless he/she has had access to child pornography where they could get ideas about such interaction unless it was first hand, I would believe the child. You can sustain the damage that confronting your spouse on this matter will bring about if it is untrue. Your child's protection is your first priority and if the accusation is true then the child risks irreparable damage and will hate you too for not defending them. We're adults. We can handle emotional catasprophe. Our kids depend on us for their defense.

Answer 2

You had better examine that very carefully. Does you child usually lie about things? Is your spouse the father? Do you have a gut instinct that you are ignoring or covering up? How old is your child? When you ask the child questions be sure that they are not leading questions. You should probably assume that he/she is telling the truth and investigate and take action. Do NOT have the spouse present when you are asking your kid questions about the incident. Do not leave them alone together! My sister was molested by her step dad for years, she still has emotional wounds. This is serious! Be wise.

Answer 3

Definitely do not ignore the child's comment. Play dolls with the child and try to get a feel for what they believe happened. Let them do the talking. Don't put suggestions out there.

Make your judgement carefully. You know your child & you know your spouse. Does the child needy for attention? Is your spouse capable? You may not want to think so in either, but right now is not the time for wishful thinking.

If you feel in your gut that the child has not made up this story, run that sucker in the ground!

Get help for your child and yourself.

Answer 4

Child? It will always be you child....even when it's 60. How old a child are we talking about. If in the teens you better investigate. If 5 or 6 leave with the child and don't let him know where you are. There have been ongoing studies for over 30 years that prove that child molesters NEVER quit.

Answer 5

You believe the child. The only way I would not believe the child is if they are saying it to split your marriage up so it can just be you and them again. Also, if you don't do anything about it, and someone else calls the authorities, you are just as guilty as the spouse for allowing it to happen. You could also serve jail time. Keep this in mind.

Answer 6

I would definitely believe the child because that is too serious of an issue for a child to make up a story like that. I think you need to take him to a counselor and maybe he will open up more about it but if this is true about you or somebody you know get that man out of the house ASAP so he doesn't hurt the poor child anymore!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 7

You don't say how old your child is, but generally speaking this is not something a child makes up. I believe you absolutely need to err on the side of caution. If your kid is under 10 yrs old, get professional help. Little kids don't lie about this stuff. Bottom line, as God is my witness, I will protect and take my child's side against my husband any and every time. He can take care of himself. Your children depend on you. Don't let them down. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 8

I wouldn't believe or disbelieve my child, or engage in any dialogue tha could lead the child one way or another, I'd immediately contact a child psychologist who specializes in these things and make an emergency appointment for them to talk with my child about it. I've read that parents often totally affect how their children talk about these things by leading them one way or another, and many kids find it almost impossible to be open and honest with their parents because of how emotional their parents get. I would find someone qualified, and unbiased to get to the bottom of what my child was talking about.

Answer 9

Report the crazy nut house. He needs help and get help for your child aswell. This is a serious matter. Believe your child.
Then again sometimes kids make stuff up to see what it is like.
Take your child to see a counsellor and see if it is the truth

Answer 10

Depends on the child and on the spouse. If the child has some type of vendetta against your spouse or has a history of lying, then you should be leary (but not discount it entirely). A parent in this situation just has to base his/her decision on who to believe on the situation itself.