2006-06-15 17:03:12 · 13 answers · asked by tyky521 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Get reconciled with your husband and work out your differences. Kids need a strong healthy family, not a patched together "Yours Mine and Ours" type thing.
2006-06-16 07:43:59 · answer #1 · answered by irishharpist 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Divorce sucks for everyone. But your kid would probebly have the same behaviour problems even if you weren't getting a divorce. They'll seem magnified, though, because it will be an emotional time for everyone. While you should reassure the young'un that ma & pa still love him/her, the limits and expectations should be very clear. Keep stress as low as possible and try to nip this in the bud before jr heads off to school. School may help, actually, since other kids are going though the same thing too, but understand teachers won't hesitate to notify you if jr is acting out there! Single parenthood does not guarentee a problem child! Be firm, but kind, and try to provide some fun time without spoiling the kid, like walks, playdates, and parktrips. Quality time with the ex jr will need, too, and this could be the hardest on you. But it'll be worth it in the long run to encourage it.
2006-06-16 04:05:11 · answer #2 · answered by mithril 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I take it most of the attention has gone in the divorce,No problem.That happens,we tend to take negativity alot harder in our brain then we do positivity.Especially something that is as important in a divorce.The child sees and feels the annomosity happening in the household,for example..your child was probably being treated different before the divorce started right?..i expect you have some important issues going on in your life,try to keep the child seperate from your personal problems because your child is to young to understand anyways,so...spend some quality time with your child and try not to let him(her) see the annomosity in the parents or household,remember..they hurt to.
2006-06-16 00:12:38 · answer #3 · answered by runninrebel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Allot of children blame themselves. Be sure to reassure him /her that it is not their fault. Allot of times when there is a divorce the child gets less attention because there is only one of you now so they will miss behave for the reaction. It can be negative attention. So be sure to make a point to sit and talk with your 4yr old. Love him/her and enjoy all the time you have they grow up fast and you look back and wonder where all the time went. Keep a positive attitude you will do wonderful.
2006-06-16 00:48:07 · answer #4 · answered by cheetahchik 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
start paying attention to your childs needs right now! She needs to know by both parents that she is loved regardless of how life is going to be now. She is hurt and confused. Also if there is alot of bickering between you and your ex, then it needs to stop at least when the child is around (like within hearing distance) also, don't talk bad about your ex in front of your child, hearing bad stuff about someone she/he loves from someone he/she loves will only make these behavior problems worse.
2006-06-16 08:51:30 · answer #5 · answered by tricksy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously its effecting her/him. Talk to them about the divorce and ask how they feel about it. Just because they're only 4 doesn't mean they can't tell you how they feel. Once you get that information ask if thats why you've been a bit moody lately. Don't say you've been behaving bad don't be mean thats the last thing your child needs right now. They're going through the same difficult thing you are.
2006-06-16 00:09:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be wise to reflect how you are personally going through the divorce. Your emotions may have affected how you deal with your child and he/she is greatly affected.
Give him/her lots of love. How close was he/she to your husband? Understand the root cause of his behavior and it would be good to visit a child psychologist to get the best answer.
2006-06-16 00:33:39 · answer #7 · answered by Jivan S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relax and spend extra time with your 4 year old. Parents involved in a divorce usually get really caught up in their matters that they tend to forget "what matters".
2006-06-16 00:08:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, first I hope you are taking care of yourself during all this. It is a trying time.
As for your child - it will be tough but believe it or not - you will get through it. First make sure you give your kid the attention he/she needs. Let him/her know that it isn't his/her fault and that mommy and daddy still love her/him.
Don't think you have to do this alone. Look for help. Books, therapists, etc.
Good luck.
2006-06-16 00:15:12 · answer #9 · answered by Daniel P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make sure you dont speak badly about his/her dad, explain to the child he is still loved by the both of you, keep him busy do fun things he likes to do, dont let him hear any information about it, eg, talking to your friends, just explain to him that mum and dad need to be apart as you do not get along very well now, but a book would help, to get a professional outlook, good luck
2006-06-16 00:09:36 · answer #10 · answered by fireball71_33 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋