Guide to women....?

Question

Dangerous: What's for dinner?
Safe:Can I help you with dinner?
Safer:Where do you want to go for dinner?
Safest:Here, have some chocolate...

Dangerous:Are you wearing that?
Safe: Gee, you look good in brown..
Safer:WOW! Look at you!
Safest: Here, have some chocolate...

Dangerous:What are you so worked up about?
Safe: What did I do wrong?
Safer: Here's fifty dollars..
Safest: Here, have some more cocolate..

Dangerous: Should you be eating that?
Safe: you know there are alot of apples left..
Safer: would you like some wine with that?
Safest: Here, have some more chocolate...

Dangerous:Soooo...what did you do all day?
Safe: I hope you didn't overdo it today..
Safer: I've always loved you in that robe!!
Safest:....I bought you more chocolate...

You know what time of the month this is best for boys and if you don't.. mark your calendar...lol

I know a kiss is great...but don't ruin my fun...I like chocolate better!!!!

This max chick who is going around nuking everyone's fun....they are just jokes ok?

and max...since I have been married for five years...I know ****....chocolate is better...

Answer 1

LOL that was really funny lol!

Answer 2

And...............


Reasons why coffee is better than women

* You don't have to put cream in your coffee to make it taste good.

* Coffee doesn't complain when you put whipped cream in it.

* A cup of coffee looks good in the morning.

* You won't fall asleep after a cup of coffee.

* You can always warm coffee up.

* Coffee comes with endless refills.

* Coffee is cheaper.

* You won't get arrested for ordering coffee at 3 AM.

* Coffee never runs out.

* Coffee is out of your system by tomorrow morning.

* You can take black coffee home to meet your parents.

* You can make coffee as sweet as you want.

* You can smoke while drinking coffee.

* You can put out a cigarette in a cup of coffee.

* Coffee smells and tastes good.

* If your coffee pot leaks, you can use a regular paper towel.

* You can always get fresh coffee.

* You can turn the pot on, leave the room, and it'll be hot when you get back.

* They sell coffee at police stations.

* You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee.

* Coffee goes down easier.

* If you put chocolate in your coffee, it doesn't put on weight.

* No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee.

* A big cup or small cup? It doesn't matter.

* Your coffee doesn't talk to you.

* Coffee smells good in the morning.

* Coffee is good when it's cold too.

* Coffee stains are easier to remove.

* Coffee doesn't care when you dunk things in it.

* Coffee doesn't care what kind of mood you're in.

* Coffee doesn't shed.

* Coffee is ready in 15 minutes or less.

* You can't get a cup of coffee pregnant by putting cream in it.

* Coffee doesn't mind being ground.

* No matter how bad coffee is, you can always make it better.

* Coffee doesn't have a time of the month...it's good all the time.

* When coffee gets old, you can throw it away.

* When you have a coffee, you don't end up with a pube in the back of your throat.

* Coffee doesn't take up half your bed.

* Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3 AM and decide to have a cup.

* INSTANT COFFEE!

* You can have an intelligent conversation with coffee.

* It can take up to 2 weeks for coffee to grow mold.

* Your coffee won't be jealous of a larger cup.

Answer 3

My mom became no longer an particularly non violent guy or woman (and not a Christian), yet I did omit no longer having "suggestion" whilst my oldest became youthful. (My mom died all at as quickly as from a stroke 10 weeks after my oldest became born.) no longer having particularly some kinfolk help at the same time as i became a single determine became particularly complicated. I wasn't very on the element of any of my aunts and might have on no account imposed on them. My grandmothers had long surpassed directly to the great beyond. Now, in spite of the indisputable fact that, those some years later, I even have met up with my mom's youngest sister. She is a believer. no person else in my nuclear kinfolk is. We do each each now and then touch on kinfolk, yet greater often than not communicate approximately our faith, yet i do no longer circulate to her for preparation, according to se. we actually don't be attentive to a minimum of one yet another that properly. it is likewise awkward to talk to her approximately my upbringing, whilst you evaluate that outcomes her memories of her sister. i might particularly that she remembered her sister fondly then to attempt to safeguard her sister's (my mom's) habit in the direction of me. i'm particularly greater of a loner. I do have a pair of sturdy pals, maximum closer to my age, that I disclose to, or seek for suggestion from. I did be attentive to an older woman from my church years in the past that became in all likelihood the closest guy or woman to a non secular mentor that I had, yet she has on account that moved 2 hours away. in some circumstances, I nonetheless call her -- long distance now, of path. i'm no longer on the element of my companion's mom the two, so I not often touch her.

Answer 4

Oh, but you didn't mention other dangerous things like, WTF is wrong with you, whispering b*tch under your breath when she asks for something, you look bloated today, what's wrong? (best thing to say, damn, your boobs look great today), where have you been, your f*cking mother called today and..., well, there's so many. I liked your list, though my fiance loves small cakes, so that would be my safest bet. Thanks for the giggles.

Answer 5

you know chocolate doesn't always work a kiss that is well done might work as well

Answer 6

I liked that keep them coming

Answer 7

Cute!!

Answer 8

lol,
nice facts


--- LeeeN

Answer 9

yep

Answer 10

hahaha