I havent been in a serious relationship in over a year. I have been through alot as far as guys are concerned. Cheating, lying etc. So I guess I do have my guards up. When I meet a guy, I have lately been pulling away because I feel that all they are interested in is sex and not getting to know me. I have a low tolerance for bullshyt so I try to stop it before it gets started by not calling all the time. Also, I dont like when a guy calls me 24/7 or alot during the day. I am fine with not being around a guy alot too. I just find that lately I need my space. I kind of miss having a constant companion. How do I see past my previous experiences and open myself up topossibly meeting someone new. I have some serious issues with my body. I would be what a guy would call curvaceous or phat. but I hate when a guy comments on it. It almost makes me sick to my stomachbecause I think they just see me as a sex object. I know some women would take it as a compliment but it disgusts me. I need help!
2006-06-15 13:30:41 · 11 answers · asked by vivian M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Honey men are just out for one thing and nobody will ever change that..... You'll know when the right one comes along, he'll be there for you and only you. (At least that's the way it's suposed to be.) Until then, it's just a guessing game,... Weeding out the bad ones........And keep doing what your doing, they love a woman who plays hard to get....LOL
2006-06-15 13:39:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
your last statement is true....you do need help. i think you need to seek therapy, not because you are crazy but because you have had really bad luck with guys. a paid outside perspective would be helpful in your situation
you said:
"Also, I don't like when a guy calls me 24/7 or alot during the day. I am fine with not being around a guy a lot too. I just find that lately I need my space. I kind of miss having a constant companion."
did you know that these statements contradict each other? i miss my constant companion and i am thrilled when she calls anytime 24/7.
bottom line is you have issues you need to work out before you will have a healthy relationship of any kind even with the greatest guy.
2006-06-15 20:40:37 · answer #2 · answered by thom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, all women are insane. Some hide their insanity better that others, but at the end of the day they are all insane. So, yes, I say, you do need help. Try relaxing a little. You probably drive the men that are interested in you away with your insanity. Men only lie when you do not believe in what they say. Men cheat because of the way you make them feel like less of a man because you don't love them enough to trust. Women trade sex for affection and men trade affection for sex. So relax, and get a massage or something. Try heading to the gym and eating more salad.
2006-06-15 20:43:12 · answer #3 · answered by elvee13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree you need the space, a year is not that long, and besides you still get a man's attention, heaps of girls don't even get that. After being cheated on etc. You need time to figure what sort of qualities you want in a partner and stick to that, also work on the qualities that you want in a partner for yourself. You don't have to give them sex, you know sex is just about their gratification and you dont get to know them that well. A decent man will wait, be patient, have intgreity, be loyal and loving and kind. You are doing the right thing by not getting involved with guys who are just going to use you. Also you seem very switched on that I sence from you that you already know we have to be happy and a relationship cant make us happy, we need to be happy inside ourselves firist, which I sence from, you just seem to be frustrated with silly man giving you unwanted attention, which is a good reason to be frustrated. So take care hope your dream man comes along at the right time and right circumstances.
2006-06-15 20:39:33 · answer #4 · answered by angleface 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been there & I can honestly tell you when the "right" guy comes around you'll know it. All those feelings will go away. Don't feel like something is wrong with you, after dealing with bullshyt for so long its only natural to pull away before it gets to that point again. Don't worry everything will turn out right :)
2006-06-15 20:50:19 · answer #5 · answered by a_rose7073 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like u have been through alot and you need a guy to treat you well without wanting sex all the time.. Maybe it's where you are meeting them.. guys will always want sex but maybe you could find one that respects u enough not to push it on you all the time and to give you space.
2006-06-15 20:34:39 · answer #6 · answered by Lookinstr8over 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay first of all you do not need mental help! secondly you just need to figure out exactly what it is you are looking for in a guy. then you need to quit letting your self feel bad because you look phat! reevaluate how you feel about you because if you are feeling bad about you then others will too. then you need to step back and look at the way you handle men in general... what kind of signals are you sending out. what are you saying? wearing? are you telling him one thing just to please him but then doing another? you just need to take the time to figure out who you really are and what you want in your life. stop looking for a relationship and take care of you! when the Right guy comes along you will know it. start living your life for you! you do not need to please any one but you! after you get you fixed then you will be able to better choose the Right man for you.
2006-06-15 20:42:34 · answer #7 · answered by chrissweetbaby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one is going to be comfortable in a relationship with you unless you are first comfortable with yourself. You may need to take some time alone- you can handle it- and learn to love yourself before you expect someone else to.
2006-06-15 20:34:22 · answer #8 · answered by Tiffany 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont need to be in arelationship in order to be a whole person. take some time to get to know yourself, learn to love yourself as you are and you will be surprised at how attractive you will be
2006-06-15 20:34:52 · answer #9 · answered by Unknown Oscillator 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe hust stop thinking about this or your past...
If you try to start new, it may help
2006-06-15 20:34:21 · answer #10 · answered by Zem Axe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋