Do you feel that men today take more than they give?

Question

It seems like every man I meet (these are men in their 40's and 50's, not 20-somethings, wants to have fun without any committment. If a woman mentions marriage or committment she is considered moving too fast but it is perfectly acceptable for a man to expect sex within a few dates. I have learned from experience that having sex early in a relationship doesn't get you anywhere. I want to have a good sex life but demand a committment and marriage first. I have tried the other and it hasn't worked. Guys today want a woman to make a lot of money, have a lot of friends, and need her own space, etc. so they don't have to "take care" of her. They want the benefits of a husband without the responsibilities. I don't care if this is the modern age, I am a truly independent woman in the sense that I hold on to traditional values no matter what the modern career woman says. I find it difficult to not be able to ask a guy important questions cause I may seem to be moving too fast

Answer 1

Yes I do. I want a man who wants to commit to one woman and do his best to fulfill my wants and needs as I would his.Not a one way affair.

Answer 2

Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesh! Well, I don't know the details but I do think that yes, you are moving too fast. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be married, but if I were dating I would not bring up the topic of marriage for a year. How can you start discussing marriage and commitment with someone unless you have come to know him really well? And that takes a long time, months and months. You don't bring it up unless and until you feel really comfortable with the guy and you've had a lot of opportunity to see how you two mesh. Who wants to feel locked into a lifetime relationship with someone he barely knows? If I'm dating, even if I'm open to the commitment of marriage, I'm going to want to be liked for who I am, and to feel understood and accepted for who I am instead of just being judged as a potential husband and provider. I can't help feeling you are looking for a quick fix to your problems, and that's going to cause you a lot of trouble if you are.

Answer 3

well, seems like society has taken a turn for the worst and men are reacting with their own self defence mechanism against women that just go after money.

perhaps it is that most women who go for these men in their 40's and 50's are in their 30's or 40's and are so disillusioned about love from previous relationships that they don't look for it, they just look for someone with enough money to take care of them.

some of these women even bring along a kid or two or three which need support and raising and eventually a college education.

taking all this into account no matter how good the sex is its not worth it, so you wonder why men don't want to settle down in that age anymore.

men have been disillusioned just as women have, it just took men longer, and while women want to party and act stupid when they are young, men want to party and act stupid when they are older, whats the point of taking care of someone elses needs and problems, i figure you better have your own money to take care of your own needs cause i sure as hell don't want to clean up your mess

Answer 4

You really have to understand something first. Men want sex, great sex and then out of this world sex. Women, they want a man who can provide them with a life filled with romance and who can support them and the lifestyle they desire. Sex is not as important to a woman as it is to a man. Women will use sex as a tool to get the man they want. (Sorry for you men haters, but statistics show this to be true)

Now, you're talking about men in the 40's and 50's so I would guess that I could be correct in saying that you are somewhere in that age range. Men who have reached that age, have, hopefully become more mature, probably went through the marriage thing and are not in a huge rush to jump into marriage again, unless they really feel that it will work this time, and hopefully learned some lessons from the last one.

Having sex early on in a relationship didn't get you anywhere for other reasons. You can pretty much bet, that there were other reasons you didn't reach your goal of, in your case, marriage because there was something or some things he didn't like. Holding out on sex won't guarantee you anything except, that the guy will eventually leave you or will have sex with others while you're dating. I know this isn't what you want to hear, but this is how it is. Keep in mind that I speak in general, overall terms. There are exceptions to every rule, but generally, and more likely than not, this is how the love game goes.

You demand commitment and marriage first before being intimate with someone. That's fine, and I have no problem with those who believe in that. But keep in mind, you are not a virgin, because you have already stated that it didn't get you anywhere. So now any guy who might want to date you, will never be intimate with you before commitment and marriage. Sorry, but you are punishing a man for another mans faults and unless you're one of the extremely lucky few that finds a guy who is going to enter that kind of relationship you will find no man will continue to date you. Let me say this, what if you get married to someone and then find out that the two of you are not sexually compatible. Then what? Get a divorce? Live with it? Hmm. With what you're asking for, you would have a better chance at winning the lottery. I'd go out and start picking those numbers.

Guys want women with money, yes, of course, it makes sense doesn't it. Personally, I'm not going to date a woman who can't support herself. Knowing that a woman is not dependent on a mans bank account, takes a lot of pressure off of the guy. Its bad enough women expect men to pay for everything. I don't mind paying for dates, but if we feel a connection, I like it when a woman asks me out for a date and pays. It shows that she cares about me and isn't after my money. I will end a relationship if I feel she is using me because I've been through all that already. I don't need that kind of woman in my life and do not have a problem being single until I can find a woman who really knows how to treat a man, because with that, I naturally find myself wanting to do everything I can to make her happy.

Maybe you should try going out there and just having a good time without worrying about marriage before you feel you have found the right man to live the rest of your life with. Guys can feel that and it is such a turn off to know that a woman is thinking about marriage before they've even had a chance to really get to know each other, which takes time, just as falling in love does.

I do wish you all the happiness you desire in your life, but you may want to rethink your strategy on dating. Don't ruin your chances with someone who might bring a lot of love and happiness into your life because now you want to hold on to "traditional values" because you have a different outlook on men.

Answer 5

Please email me at [e-mail] i would really like to keep in touch with you through email.I am 24,well educated masters student doing phd doctrate.Yet our family friends(for decades)when he moved abroad for studies/work we started talking over phone/email after sometime realised we were in love.But it was same case with me when i mentioned marriage/commitment he is quiet now its been 3 months though he expects me back in his life,acts like im his,he loves me.I am to be his gf,to be his,his love,be there for him as friend and love but he wont take it till marriage/commitment.Not even that i have to search gfs for his friends,keep update on his family,seriously im giving so much then i actually get in return from him.So from past 3 months i am not calling or emailing him if he loves me can commit/marry me hell propose marriage/commit to me.

Answer 6

I think jimmyweda really hit the nail on the head.

Answer 7

yes every man want fun if u want than contact me i will fulfill all of ur desires

Answer 8

OF COURSE THATS HOW MEN GET THEIR NAMES (DOGS)NO WOMAN CAN UNDERSTAND THE WAY A MANS MIND WORKS