i was looking through her phone because i was about to buy the same razor V3c from the same carrier so i was checking out all the screens and i noticed the call... not sure what to think of it, but it's like this guy friend who i think likes her from work, but she is the one who called him. I dunno, I hate to be a jealous pain.. but it bugs me what do you think?
2006-06-15 10:16:56 · 34 answers · asked by stratocastinator 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yeah as far as me being distrustful, wow, that's a crazy assumption considering you don't know me. I am the most foolhardy boyfriend ever i never ever check up on her and i don't mind that either of us have friends of the oposite sex, seeing as i live at college in the doorms and spend tons of time with coed neighbors, but this one is a little different because people at her work gossip about this guy liking her and so forth. On top of that, the phone thing, i totally was checking out her phone, which is similar to mine which i recieved yesterday and by the way Verison V3c Razr rocks my face omfg love this thing. Back to the point, don't judge me when I am just trying to get a different perspective on a subject to avoid hurting my Girlfriend of 5 YEARS feelings if it is unnecesary.
2006-06-15 10:38:45 · update #1
Talk to her make sure you know the situation. Don't jump to conclusions, but at the same time women do the same things to guys as far as looking in your phone so, you're not wrong and trust your instics they are there for a reason. If she lies to you, don't scream, don't yell just walk away from the relationship. I'd treat her like a stranger I walked past on the street, with no familiarity, and be done with it. There had to be some other things that you've been noticing before now if she is cheating. That is the Ulitimate disrespect, and no one deserves it. I hate to accuse casue I don't know her but sounds like your trust in her is already damaged.
2006-06-15 10:25:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, worry. But (1) neither she nor I believes your story of "just lookin' at the Razr" and (2) your jealously and controlling nature have led you to have a less than healthy relationship with a person who confirms your suspicions of distrust.
Since you naturally distrust people, you choose an untrustworthy person so your worst fears can be confirmed and let you know your world that "people can't be trusted" is true. Because if you did find a woman that was trustworthy, your world would collapse. And she wouldn't want a suspicious person like you anyway.
**update: you know the answer to this one. You already had suspicions, but you were with her five years which is a long time. Maybe you need to take a breather from dating and get settled and confident in your own mind what you need and want, and then you will find a trustworthy woman and you will be a more trusting person as well because you will trust yourself.
2006-06-15 10:27:54 · answer #2 · answered by dr_dr_evil 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a little peculiar, but if it was only once, I wouldn't worry. If this happens on a regular basis, then confront her. Relationships (no matter how long) don't work if there isn't trust and communication. Maybe she is confiding in this friend, telling him how great you are. Maybe not. Stop playing the guessing game and ask her. If you trust her, then her answer should be enough.
Sidenote:
How does she feel about you looking at her phone log? Will she be able to trust you?
2006-06-15 13:43:51 · answer #3 · answered by lolly77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reading the previous response, most of them have been good sound advice.
I can only add these things. It wasn't an accident that you found that your GF called someone only an hour after she got home. You had to tabulate the mathematics of it all to discover that. Just browsing would not have readily revealed any of the math behind the inquiry. So... :) I would say you've already made up your mind on the issue.
A lesson: Open your hands and pretend I put a glob of jello in each one. Now squeeze one of them shut. What happens to the jello in the closed hand? What happens to the jello in the open hand?
Relationships are alot like that. The harder you squeeze them, the harder they are to hold on to.
2006-06-15 11:46:58 · answer #4 · answered by gejepsen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could always ask her if she shares her feelings about you with anyone & hopefully, she'll open up. Then see if she has been sharing that info with her guy friend. If she values the relationship she has with you enough, she won't mind sharing what goes on between her & her guy friend. Then, hopefully, the door will be opened & you can ask more questions & draw a better conclusion of what's going on. Don't let her even think you're making an accusation of hanky-panky about her & her friend... that would offend her if there's been none. If she doesn't open up & share with you, then she needs to realize that you're left to draw your own conclusions. We're human beings, prone to hope for the best & imagine the worst. We don't want to think badly of our partners, but sometimes we need their help so there won't be any negative thoughts in situations like that.
2006-06-15 10:45:02 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd be a little cautious. Straight forward ask. If she gives you a BS answer, or body language is different, or hesitates when asked. I don't like the sound of this, b/c I had a similar incident with a girl who around the same time, 1am text somebody and then had to "leave for work help". ugh, its a red flag in my opinion. good luck.
2006-06-15 10:24:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd be a little concerned. Not to try and feed your fears but when I used to do tell my ex that I was tired and going home, it almost always was a bad thing.
Explain to her how you came across the call ( so you don't look like a jealous freak ) and tell her that it bothers you. Don't ask her why she phoned. Leave that up to her to explain. Just be calm. For all we know it could be nothing.
2006-06-15 10:24:24 · answer #7 · answered by happy_fairy_gurl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no such thing as friends between the sexes maybe only in kindergarten. if i were i'd spy at her at work they say people cheat the most with people they work with. don't bother asking her 4 the truth. people who cheat never come clean. they are probably screwing on their luch break together going off 2 a remote place like the forest preserves having sex in his or her car. check it out cause u dont want to inherit an std from this guy, orsomething worse... you are worth it check it out!!!
2006-06-15 10:23:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be worried. Either she likes him, or she's upset with you and called someone to vent. Maybe she called the guy to get a guys perspective. Either way, doesn't look good for you. I have very close guy co-workers and I rarely call them, especially not at 1:30am. Good luck.
2006-06-15 10:21:17 · answer #9 · answered by babe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems fishy to me. I don't call any of my co-workers at 1:30am. I would be suspicous. Problem is, you can't call her on it because you shouldn't have been looking at her phone in the first place without her knowing. I would keep my eyes and ears open for suspicious behavior if I was you.
2006-06-15 10:21:09 · answer #10 · answered by Kitty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋