Should I email him and tell him how I feel regarding how he used me?

Question

My boyfreind just broke up with me yesterday. It was a long distance relationship I live in the USA and he lives in France. Basically, he told me he did not love me. But, he cared about me and wanted to be freinds. He did this all in an email. But, I did not respond and blocked him from ever emailing me again. I think I was used because when he came to visit me he would kiss me and hug me and want to ge itimate with me. Which I refused.
He also had a lot of freinds who were girls. He said they are just freinds because he gets along better with girls than guys. But, my instincts tell me he was cheating on me.
I feel like I was used. Also, I do not think I want to be friends with him. Should I think differently? Should I email him back and tell him how I feel or leave it alone and never correspond with him again?

Answer 1

Leave it alone and never talk to him again. Why waste anymore time on him than you already have? Move on, you can always do better. If you really need to vent, write an email, but don't send it. He will be so satisfied to know he broke someone's heart or actually affected them. He sounds like a real jerk who doesn't deserve to know. It would be better for him to wonder if it ever even bothered you or did you even care.

Answer 2

You don't want to be friends, and you don't seem to really care that he broke up with you. What you do seem to care about is that he got the last word. You are partly to blame for the breakup, and you probably know that. He may not have been entirely honest with you (perhaps not at all), but you rebuffed his advances. You rejected him, so it shouldn't come as a surprise that he dumped you. He can probably have a closer relationship with someone geographically closer to him. That doesn't seem to bother you.

In truth, you don't really feel used. Basically, you're ticked that he dumped you, and you, in a knee jerk reaction, blocked him and allowed him to have the last word. Writing him would only be a childish attempt to have the last word. Be the adult one here, and just move on.

Answer 3

I don't quite understand why you feel like you were used. He wanted to get intimate with you. You refused. Nothing much happened, and he went back home to France.

Your relationship didn't work out for both of you. He decided not to pursue you anymore. And he told you this in his e-mail, which was the right thing to do.

When guys break up their romantic relationship with a lady, they sometimes try to do it with as much gentleness as they can muster in order not to hurt the lady's feelings. And one common way a guy does this is to say to the lady that she is a good person to be friends with and there is nothing wrong with her, but he just doesn't have the romantic feelings for her anymore. And that part of his relationship with her he wants to end.

This is what the guy has done with you. And I think that his offer to continue being just friends with you is nothing more than his expression of politeness and respect for your feelings. He probably doesn't really expect you to continue being friends with him. And he would be surprised if you e-mail him back and make something out of his friendship offer.

Perhaps you really liked this guy and you didn't want to break up with him. And that may be where you misunderstanding is coming from.

Answer 4

Forget about him. Long distant relationships are rare to work out. Leave it alone. You shouldn't feel totally used right? You did not give him any of your goodies! If he wanted to be with you sexually and you turned him down then he will just get it from one of his "friends". Follow your gut on this. If you e-mail him back it better be to tell him off. I promise you that the only reason he wants to remain friends with you...it's 'cause he is still hoping to nail you just like he's doing to the others.

Answer 5

i personally would feel weird about being friends with him. because i am very emotional, i would put everything in an email and send it to him. (but you want to make sure the email is calm and respectable, or else you're going to get in more trouble) give him time to respond and see if he has at least a reasonable response. if not, block him and never talk to him again because you don't want to keep corresponding with someone if they are only going to upset you.

Answer 6

Its best just to let it be. If you send an e-mail he will know how much this has bothered you. Dont give him the satisfaction. Anyway, what is the point of being in a committed relationship with someone who lives in France ??

Answer 7

Nope if a gril did that to me i wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing it hurt. Never let people see or hear you sweating them. If I were you I'd treat him with no familiarity at all, Like a stranger that walks past you on the street that you don't care to meet. Be strong and walk away he didn't deserve you and if you email him you open youre self to possible further abuse or degradation. Fu** that, life is hard enough.

Answer 8

Long distance doesn't work. Eventually everyone gets lonely. Don't give him the satisfaction of a response. Just leave it alone and go out and do something fun with your family or friends.

Answer 9

The guy has done nothing wrong....did he sleep with you?Or he only kissed you...He told you from the beginning that he just wants to be friends with you..that he does not love you..he visited you...tried kissing and huggin you which you refused...apparently you are in love with him....why did you not tell him how you felt from the beginnning?I think there is nothing to talk about this issue....since he did not make love to you....

Answer 10

I think your first instinct is correct. Right now, you are not ready to be friends with this guy. Wether he cheated on your or not, you are not ready. Let him go and learn from this experience that long distance relationships don't work.