I mean, I like them and then I push them away by acting like I don't. I don't know why I do it. It's like the more I like them, the more I get scared around them and the more I don't wanna be around them because they make me feel scared and nervous. How can I overcome my habit of pushing guys away?
2006-06-15 00:57:56 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think it's your subconscience trying to keep you from getting hurt (again?) I do the same thing but I am well aware of it and actually bask in my misery when I get rid of some potential boyfriend. I personally will go out of my way to avoid a guy that I am attracted to or think I might like more than friends. I talk to plenty of cute guys and ones I can go out with but the guys that I actually click with, or see some potential in I avoid. Keep from getting hurt again. You'll probably come around when you are ready, until then just ride it out. You could try be a whore to overcome your inhibitions but aside from that I don't know what you could do to overcome this as I have never viewed it as a problem.
2006-06-15 01:07:04 · answer #1 · answered by Marlene 5 · 9⤊ 1⤋
When you find someone you really like who likes you back, start slow, as friends and explain to him/her that you have a tendency to build barriers and push people away; that it only means you're beginning to like him/her even more and are involuntarily trying to protect yourself from getting too close, which leaves you open to hurt, which you don't want.
Learn more about him so you two build a bond of trust. The more trust there is, the more ok you'll feel to let go of the armour. And don't be too hard on yourself. We're all this way or have been at some point.
2006-06-15 01:05:47 · answer #2 · answered by Agog 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Until you search and discover why you do this there is little hope of correcting it. If you are pushing them away because there is red flags going up then listen to those instincts and keep pushing those away. If it is fear for what ever reason then again search as to why you are afraid and then you can work on that fear. It kinda sounds like you fear relationships or these guys are challenging your safe zones which would cause you to become threatened. Search you heart and soul to find the answers out.
2006-06-15 01:05:55 · answer #3 · answered by Sunshine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
discover new pastimes and acquaintances. perhaps even as college starts you'd be extra balanced and reduce back on your previous self back rather of using the pretend act. i'm not positive of your age in spite of the undeniable fact that it form of feels you're youthful and each and every man or woman is going by a large number of emotional ameliorations even as nonetheless in adolescents and early 1920s. i'm sorry your associates are not as giving and thoughtful as you're, i comprehend what it truly is favor to provide and be thoughtful and in no way have it back. You musn't be bitter and keep giving...it truly is going to ultimately come decrease back to you. not positive what your pastimes are yet come across a set to affix with a similar that you'll come across new friendships. undergo in concepts, favourite is a clean day and some thing large may be merely around the nook for you! What suggestion may you supply to someone with a similar question? I commonly ask myself this even as confronted with an issue or perhaps if I dont like the answer...I many times discover it interior myself.
2016-11-14 19:34:37 · answer #4 · answered by durgin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think we all go threw that , even when we get older lol. just be yourself and try and relax. you must get so stresses out and shut the person out. is there any reson guys make you feel scared? have you got any male mates that you hang around with maybe you could get them to hang out with you while you are getting to know the new guy. good luck
2006-06-15 01:06:25 · answer #5 · answered by sooocool 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lack of confidence is what makes all this happen. The best solution for it is to take things casually and wait till things really go worse.
2006-06-15 01:06:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
be more confident of ureself...u're nervous coz u think tht they won't like you ...but what if they do?.....as far as you being scared there's nothing to be scared about and if u do it's probably coz u don't know where u're heading...so just be more sure of ureself and your feelings and if u ever wonder how a possible relation may turn out be...don't think over it....act on it
2006-06-15 01:28:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do the same thing..but it because deep down I feel that I will be rejected so I push people away before they reject me.
2006-06-15 01:00:16 · answer #8 · answered by Coodles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about it. Whatever your fantasies are, pursue that. REGARDLESS what they are, as long as your not hurting anyone. You may be surprised where they lead. Stop playing at what is acceptable to everyone else, to be accepted in society and in your current peer group. The problem is, your forcing yourself to be what you're not, to fit in.
2006-06-15 01:07:56 · answer #9 · answered by Love is the principle thing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem just don't worry about the out come and tomorrow just enjoy the present time. Relax have fun okay.
2006-06-15 01:02:30 · answer #10 · answered by askmeguru21 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋