alrite well my boyfriend has been really upset lately. he just found out that his grandmother has cancer and there isnt anything anyone can do about it. he is really close with his grandmother and he gets upset when he talks or thinks about the whole thing and i dont know what to say to him when hes upset. i have never really experienced any kind of death in the family before and i dont know how to react to something like that. i just hate seeing him upset and i feel like im not really helping at all because i never know what to say to him. please help me!!
2006-06-14 15:38:13 · 14 answers · asked by never_let_me_go_x22 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I went through this with my husband when we first started dating. You just have to really show him your there for him if he needs to talk or whatever. Make sure that you are this is a hard time for him. Try to cheer him up, but don't over do it or you may annoy him. Just be really supportive and tell him that you will be there if he needs you. He be upset for some time but time will heal and if you have been there through it all he will never foget this!
2006-06-14 15:45:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 2⤋
no one knows what to say when you know that someone is going to die. Just remind him to think of all the happy memories that he has had with her. I was very close to my grandmother when she died, and my mom told me not to come to the hospital to see her because she wasn't really with it. She had a massive heart attack and died. At the funeral visitation, i found out that my brother and his wife were up to see her and my grandmother told her that she led a good life, she's had two grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren and she couldn't have asked for more. But i never got to say good-bye to her. But i have the happy memories that i cherish and will always cherish. Try to get your boyfriend to talk about all the positive things and tell him to make her last days on earth as memorable as he can.
2006-06-14 15:56:05 · answer #2 · answered by devie46 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Suggest that you go see his Grandmother, this would help her alot and him the same. Be there for him. If he cries, let him, losing someone isn't some thing you can just get over. Encourage him to spend time with her while he still can so he can have closure when she passes on. Just be there to hold his hand through this, he'll never forget it. Best wishes.
2006-06-14 15:46:35 · answer #3 · answered by Emi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can give him is your warmth, caring and understanding and to be there for him when he needs someone to talk to!
He might not want to talk about it now and do not push that point, but at some time he will need to express his sadness, pain and inner feelings!
Tell him you are there for him and give him your time and a shoulder to cry on if he needs one!
A simple warm and loving hug is often the best medication you can get at times like this!
All the very best...
2006-06-14 15:47:29 · answer #4 · answered by tacrj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to say anything unless you are asked a direct question. Just being available for support is all that you can offer at this time. People have to work their way through difficult times such as failed relationships, sickness and death. Best wishes.
2006-06-14 15:44:57 · answer #5 · answered by gedanini3@yahoo.com 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's probably not looking for you to say anything at all. Sometimes it's best just to be a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen. Give him time to grieve... now and when the inevitable occurs. Good luck!
2006-06-14 15:44:05 · answer #6 · answered by cgspitfire 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lost my brother to cancer he was 48. I don't know what type she has but reading up on the type of cancer she has will help alot to understand whats happening to her. He is feeling helpless but tell him to read up about it. It helped me.
2006-06-14 16:06:33 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
then your bf is not matured enough. he must accept, death is a part of the life. life cycle it is..everyone will die, but time will tell the difference. tell him, he must accept it..if it is the time for his grandma to go, then it is. just let her go..it's inevitable..
then after we all died, he can meet her again in next life-only if you believed it
2006-06-14 15:45:27 · answer #8 · answered by James Bond 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be there for him and support him and he'll be fine. He might not tell you how much he truly appreciates it now, but he will in the long run. :)
2006-06-14 15:41:52 · answer #9 · answered by saxophist 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husbands grand-ma died and she was the one that he always ran too. let him greive for her and help him realize that she has given him guidance and help through all these years and that its okay to step back and appreciate that no matter what emotion it bring on.
2006-06-15 04:41:00 · answer #10 · answered by bearngunner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋