I don't want to have a big wedding, but I want the presents... lol...?

Question

Sad but a little true... lol.
I would like to elope to Vegas to be honest. So the question is... if I have a big reception at home, do I still get the presents?

I'm not really so shallow, just a bit poor...

LoL... everyone thinks I'm evil... if you only knew!
Anyway, I just want to know if presents are given at receptions when there's no wedding.
I don't want the judgement. You guys crack me up!

Answer 1

This is not uncommon. It has been my experience that couples who marry in Vegas, for budgetary reasons, and have a reception after the fact back home do receive gifts. I would hope your guests would understand that you couldn't have the big, traditional wedding because you didn't have the money for it.

Answer 2

Are you not having any bridal showers beforehand? If you nudge your friends a little (don't bang them over the head with this idea and become a bridezilla) then maybe they will throw you a shower or two and you can get presents that way.

I agree with the person who posted about not calling it a reception. You did not have a ceremony there, do not call it a reception. If you have a congratulatory party or something, a welcome back party even, then maybe people will bring something. But it is really up to your guests to bring things either way.

You could even have it at a park and do BBQ or something if you wanted, depends on the theme you go for. But no matter what situation you had, even if you had the wedding and reception in the same town or whatever, your guests will bring things if they want to or not.

Bridal showers make people feel like they are part of everything and you don't really dip any money in because it is thrown in your honor, you might want to go this route considering the financial situation you are painting. But it all depends on you and your hubby-to-be.

The more people you invite to your shin-dig whenever and however you want to do it, the more likely you are to receive presents but your guests will take cues off of each other so keep in contact with everyone throughout the whole process. I know someone who registered at 7 different places and it does seem, just a little, like she is asking for tons of stuff by doing that. We registered at 2 places and have gotten a good amount of stuff already and only gone through 1 shower, but we registered for stuff we really need. I think it's better to register for stuff you need and when people look at your registry they will say, "wow, I want to get them X,Y,Z thing because they really need it" like a good set of knives or plates and glasses but make it reasonable for them.

If you have a big party when you come back, you will have to spend some money, but if you have sponsors for that it will make it easier on everyone because the costs will be split.

Hope it all turns out well. I would be interesting in knowing how it all pans out.

Answer 3

If you want the gifts but not the big wedding than about a month before you get married send out invites to a reception make the food yourself,it can be finger foods like sandwiches and salads tea and coffee veggie plates and junkfood..sweets are easy to make and everyone brings a plate of something(along with a gift)..Make sure you put together an album of the wedding you had no matter where it is or when it takes place and leave it on the same table you want your guest book,so people can see what they weren't invited too..All this including the hall(if you want one) decorations(at any dollar store) and food should run you no more than 300.00 bucks..If your that poor suggest to family and friends that money would be a better gift,it will get around to everyone else(they always call one another to ask what they are getting you)
OR
You could have a bridal shower prior to getting married with the same effect as the top..Before or after either way you will still recieve gifts and people will get the feeling theya re apart of your wedding and really thats all they want--is to be apart of it..

Answer 4

Alot of people can't afford to host a big wedding. Elope to someplace exotic, or take a cruise and get married on the ship. Then when you get back, have a reception. You can wear a white evening gown to the party and have a good time. AND people will bring prezzies.

That being said, there are less expensive ways to have a big wedding. Choose a day of the week other than Saturday. How about a Thursday evening? Do something less traditional and more unusual. It will usually save your some money if you just get a little creative.

Answer 5

If you want a small wedding, have a samll wedding. You can have a big reception for the presents. The key is to invite a lot of people, that way you end up eating your wedding cake and having it too.

Answer 6

Totally understood. A friend of mine registered at Target and JC Penney's. She had a very small ceremony that was limited to family and had the reception at a local reception hall at the lake which is where they accepted gifts as well.
To rent it was like $500 and she got a bunch of us to get together and made decorations over a few weeks. It wasn't tacky. We were her friends and we wanted her to have a beautiful wedding.

Answer 7

If the guests would be invited to the reception only then it's up to them if they want to bring a present or not. Just don't expect a bunch of stuff. Just being truthful. Maybe your guests, espcially close family and friends who already know your financial situation will get you guys something good.

Answer 8

It's up to the guests at the reception if they choose to bring a gift. Most of the time, yes, they will, however, you should never have a reception expecting a gift - it is a celebration of marriage, not a birthday party.

Answer 9

unfortunately, the reason you receive gifts is because you host a wedding and invite the people nearest and dearest to you. if you're eloping then you don't get presents. if you elope, but then return home and have a big party to celebrate, then you should still receive gifts, but you have to spend some money on your guests. it's all give and take!

Answer 10

You should not use a wedding as an excuse to milk people for presents. What makes you deserving of this generosity?

Go ahead and elope and send people a bill for what you think you 'deserve' for getting married. At least you'd be honest about your greedy goals.