my daughter is 14 and she is out of control, you look at her wrong she gets mad,she swares and doesnt listen?

Answer 1

She can get mad and not listen all she wants as long as you are punishing her for her bad behavior. She will only get worse if you don't constantly force her to behave. Along with punishing her continue to take time to talk to her and explain to her why her behavior is wrong. It doesn't matter if you have to say the same thing a million times over to her, don't give up.

Answer 2

Your daughter sounds frustrated and feels most comfortable with letting you have it. Ever try to teach your kid something? It's like forget it! Then have some stranger try, and they're all ears. That's because they are not comfortable with a stranger to voice an objection.

If I were you this is what I would do.
1. Make sure you always assure her that you love her and she's a great kid!
2. Calmly, without raising your voice, or becoming upset, let her know that her behavior is unacceptable. You must be very specific. Don't let things like her rolling her eyes or mumbling slide. Pick up on it immediately and call her on it. Like what's with the face? This will reinforce that you are paying attention to her and that she is not so clever.
3. Take away privileges as a result of bad behavior, texting, IMing, computer, social time.
4. Try to be empathetic to her problems. Don't minimize them or try to invalidate them. The more she knows that you understand what she's facing, the more she will talk to you.
5. Be strong but not mean. Love, love, love. Hugs and kisses, lots of them. If you have to take away privileges, she may really push back on you to see if you’re bluffing, to measure your breaking point. Be prepared in advance to handle this. If she is determined to be a brat, then let her do it, but without any privileges. Close the kitchen, remove all of the previously mentioned past times, empty her room of everything, do not give her money for anything, limit her clothes to 2 outfits of your choosing, no social time, no TV, no phone calls, everything.

This might seem like you're making it worse. Making what worse? Peace in the home? There is none when you have a child calling the shots. So don't kid yourself.

You are teaching her how to handle a bratty kid, she may need this when she becomes a mother.

Answer 3

It's going to be very difficult to impose discipline on her at the age of 14 if you haven't been doing it all along. That said, it's time to let her know who's running the show. If she disobeys or curses you, take away her privileges - TV, computer, phone, having friends over, going out after school, video games, WHATEVER SHE ENJOYS!!! If you don't get control now, you might as well give up. This CHILD lives in your house. You provide her food, her clothes, a roof over her head, her schooling, EVERYTHING! I suggest you sit down with her and explain that, however things may have been in the past, that's all going to change. As long as she abides in your house, she will show you respect and follow your rules. If she feels she cannot do that, there is always juvenile detention, boot camp, or she can sue for emancipation if she thinks she can support herself. I have 2 children that I adore, but my job is not to be their friend, it is to be their mother. They are children and I am an adult, as faulted as I may be. I think you should ALWAYS love your children, no matter what, but that doesn't mean you have to accept any and all behavior from them. Be strong, even if it hurts. You (and they) will be glad you did. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 4

Take a deep breath... hold it... let it out... and do it again. And again. Wait. Be patient. This will pass. In part, she's probably looking to figure out where the boundaries are. Plus, she's a mass of raging hormones, which is no fun, as you may recall. Choose your battles wisely, and make it clear that respect has to be mutual, but above all be patient.

My stepdaughter HATED me--purely on principle (didn't want her dad to be with ANYONE)--for the first two years I was with her dad. Screaming fits, nasty letters, grabbing her dad's hair by the handful so she could yank the phone out of his hand and hang up if he was talking to me. I was miserable, panicky, thought it would never get better, but he said... wait it out, be patient, be consistent. She's the kid, you're the grownup. So act like one. She and I are now really close--she's an amazing young woman, and I'm so glad that I followed his advice. I think the worst part--for me anyway--is that it HURTS when someone yells or swears at you. It's hard to remember to be the grownup and respond in a healthy way rather than lashing back and escalating the war. And it takes time. But it's good... anyway, good luck. Keep breathing.

Answer 5

It's hard to realize this but i believe that sometimes the reason girls between the age 12-16 have such an attitude it because of *sigh* puberty, it's true. If it's not, have you asked her what's happened recently? What's going on with her life? Why is she acting like such a jerk? Be nice, don't smack her, that's not going to solve anything, talk to her, and try to be a understanding parent and ask her to stop.

Answer 6

Pleaseeeeeeee dont listen to dirty birdie. You should never beat your childre know matter what. Try havig a calm talk with her and ask her if there is anything bothering her. If she starts yellig ad swearing ask her to calm down and have a talk with her about life and treating people with respect.but its true... you should have taught her discipline when she was just a tiny little girl. But i dont know maybe you did. Just do your best and good luck.

Answer 7

the problem with your 14 year old daughter is because in school she gets stress allot, it may be because of some boy or just because she thinks is cool ,or even because of her friends .
but the most common problems with teenagers are because a certain guy doesn't look at her the way that she wants him to look at her she may get stress because the boy doesn't even look at her. the best way to solve this is that her mother become friends with her so she can be able to talk to your daughter.

Answer 8

Start taking away privilages 4m her. That worked 4 me. Maybe there is something else that she is trying 2 hide though that could be the couz of her being moody and disrespectful. Ask her.

Answer 9

everyone was a teenager at one time, but you need to really get control of her asap, because for the next several years it is only going to get worse
the good thing is that if you get control she will respect you more for it later

Answer 10

I'm sorry that you are having such a time with your child. Just keep repeating this mantra....the apple doesn't fall far from the tree....the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Ask yourself...do you swear?...do you listen?...are you being the role model she needs?