Almost 3 year old son fights when I we need to change a diper, what shall I do?

Question

Our son, Jason will be 3 in Aug. He fights us all the time when we need to change his diper. We are trying to potty train him, but all he does is sit there he doesn't pee or poop at all.
I am teaching him to sit first. And I don't belive in treats when it comes to training him. I didn't get treats when I got potty trained why should my kids get treats. Any ideas on what I should do!

Answer 1

The only right reason for beginning to potty train your child is that your little one has show an actual interest in using the potty. You will also find that when your child is ready, potty training will be much easier. If you have not seen a strong interest, then your attempts will be useless, and you may find yourself becoming frustrated and even angry that the potty training has not been successful. The key is to begin potty training when your child is ready, not when you are ready.

Before you can begin to potty train your child, you must first ask yourself whether your child shows signs of readiness. The top five signs of potty training readiness are:

1. Your child can stay dry for a several hours or even overnight.

2. Your child knows when he has wet or soiled his diaper, and knows what "pee", "poop", "potty", and similar words mean.

3. Your child shows independence by wanting to do things by himself.

4. Your child can pull his pants down and up.

5. Your child asks questions and/or shows in interest when others go "potty".

If your child has most, and hopefully all, of the above signs of readiness, you may be ready to begin potty training. Here is the method I recommend that parents follow:

Buy Cotton Training Pants
First of all, do not use disposable training pants (such as Huggies "Pull-Ups"). They are too much like a diaper and very absorbent, and tend to confuse many children. My recommendation is to use plain cotton training underpants. These training pants are similar to normal underwear, but they have a little extra padding in the crotch area. Usually you can find these in any store that sells children's clothing. I recommend that you buy approximately 9-12 pairs of the underpants. You should also purchase several pairs of "plastic/nylon pants", which will be worn over the cotton underpants.

The Big Day Is Here
Decide when you will begin to potty train your toddler. Make sure that when you do begin, that there is nothing traumatic going on in your child's life and that you can give your child and the potty training your full attention.

On the big day, tell your little one that he is going to start using the "big boy" or "big girl" underwear, or whatever term you like, and start having your child use them. I would recommend using the underpants with the plastic pants over them, but the choice is yours. The plastic pants will help to protect your child's clothing.

It is also important that when you do decide to begin potty training, that you are able to follow the steps in a consistent method. If you child attends preschool, make sure the caregivers understand the method of potty training you are following and require them to follow the same method. You should also make sure that you follow the method when you are away from home or when you have company.

Wetting & Soiling
Be aware that your child may wet the underpants and soil them. Very few children will be accident free in the early days of potty training. As a matter of fact, this may happen over and over again. Just remember to remain calm and patient.

When your little one tells you that he has wet his pants, take him into the bathroom and sit him on the toilet as you remove the wet underpants and clothing. At this point you may wish to explain to your little one that he needs to remember to go potty in the big toilet. Let him sit on the toilet so that he will get used to the feel of it. After you have removed the wet clothing, get the clean underpants and other clean clothing, if necessary. When you have the dry, clean clothing ready, help your little one clean his bottom. After this, you can put the clean underpants and clothing on.

Personal Hygiene
Another very important step is to make sure to have your child flush the toilet, even if they didn't "go" in it. After flushing, go together to your sink and wash your hands together. Again, the handwashing should be done even if your child didn't actually "go" in the toilet. With the toilet flushing and the handwashing, you are getting your child ready for the routine of what happens when you go potty.

These are the steps and you should repeat them over and over, in a consistent pattern, until your child is fully potty trained. If your child is terrified to be placed on the toilet, or if your child continues soiling the underpants for days, with no urination or bowel movements in the toilet, then your child is not ready for potty training at this time. Stop potty training for a while, and resume again when your child might be more ready.

I also want to remind you to enjoy this time. Yes, enjoy it! This is a very big milestone for your child and although it creates a lot of work for you, it will all be worth it.
http://www.rubyglen.com/articles/training.htm

Answer 2

I actually know this one from experience. Okay, are you ready? Are you sure? It'll work, I swear to you, if you do it right and don't mess up. It's pretty easy. Just read this blog a few times to get the idea firmly planted in your head, you cannot afford to mess this up. And can I just say, that just because you weren't raised with praise when you made a dookie or a wizzle for the first time doesn't mean that your child can't have a great first time experience. After all, your mom isn't trying to get your child to go potty, it's you, your enthusiasm that counts. And it will be rewarded with a successfull potty in the toilet. If you never learn a single thing about parenting, know this; that people AND animals are more likely to respond in a much more positive way if you praise them instead of raising your voice or hand. It's called Positive Reinforcement; and it works ltike a charm, you should maybe research the term on the internet and read up on it.

As you may know, there are many reasons why children have a hard time getting potty trained but an important one is that they are nurvous about this new adventure in life, its completely out of there normal everyday experience. It can be scary. Sometimes they just don't want to grow up, they want to always stay small, needy, or they're just plain as day, sizing you up trying to test all your buttons.

So, you have to make this a FUN, a FESTIVE, a HAPPY PARTY; or it won't work. And I do emphasize making it a blast. The best bathroom experience they'll have. Ready?

You first start out by getting some balloons, birthday whistles, the tea set or the GI Joes and dump trucks, gather up all of their favorite stuffed animals and dolls that you can find. Then, take everybody, including your spouces/partner, siblings into the bathroom and arrange everyone up around the toilet. Cause you're going to have a party WHEN s/he goes potty.
(Note: this is also a GREAT first impression on the younger siblings; they're not going to be able to wait to do it themselves).
Second, you get everybody out of the bathroom, no one is having a party until they do the deed. You give your child a cup out of the cupboard and give him/her WHAT EVER their little heart desires; whether it's juice, milk (chocolate or strawberry is fine), water, or soda, doesn't matter just keep giving it to them. Encourage them to drink; DO NOT NAG THEM THOUGH!

Go back to doing something else. You don't want to stand over them and make them nurvous now do you? You can't expect them to perform well under pressure. Take the focus off of potty time.

When they're done with the glass, CALMLY ask them if they need to use the bathroom, ONCE, NOT TWICE. Refill it if they say no and let em drink it. Keep offering them more and make sure they are drinking. Don't be too discouraged though if it doesn't happen in 5' 10, 20, 40, or a 140 minutes, give the bladder some time to tell the brain that it desperately needs to releave itself or there's going to be another mess.

GENTLY AND NICELY ask them ONCE every 15 min or so, if they need to use the restroom. Sooner or later they're going to say yes and when they do you can get as exited as you want. The more the better!

You don't ever want to say anything harsh, mean, snappy to them during this process. Remember, the human body can only take so much liquid so just be patient and wait for your child to tell you s/he has to go potty. And, more times than not, the first time will prove to be unsuccessfull, but worry not, IT WILL HAPPEN! And when it does, you want to show him/her that this an exciting moment, so you jump up and down, sing the potty in the toilet song, blow on your birthday wistles, sing for joy, wave your hands in the air and all of the childs helpers (toys/dolls) will be joining in on the fun as well.

Answer 3

If he is fighting it then it is time for the potty. his father needs to show him how to urinate and go to the bathroom with him and someone set on the toliet as he sits on his potty.

tell him he is a big boy now and that is what big boys do.

Assess your toddler's readiness for toilet training. Ask yourself these questions: Does your toddler follow simple instructions? Dislike having a soiled diaper? Know words for stool and urine? Sit for 5 minutes or more attending to a project? Understand the physical signals indicating the presence of urine or stool? Have dry periods for 2 hours or longer? Wake up dry from naps? These are all good indications that you can start introducing your toddler to the potty.

2. Buy a potty or toilet seat. Choose one that will suit the needs and preferences of both you and your toddler. Do you want one you can take with you anywhere? Do you want one that will rest safely on public toilets? Do you want one that makes music? Don't be surprised if your child doesn't agree with the one you think is right.

3. If you feel comfortable, have your child sit on his potty with clothes on while you, your spouse, or another person of the same sex as your child goes to the bathroom. Don't try to restrain your child or force him or her to sit down. If your toddler shows extreme fear or disdain for the potty, put it away and try again, or let your child explore the toilet seat independently.

4. Sit your child on the toilet seat without a diaper when he or she shows no signs of fear. Explain to your child what is supposed to happen on the potty. Don't be surprised if nothing happens for a long time. After two-plus years of passing urine and stool in a diaper, change will come slowly.

5. Create a toilet routine. Following a routine will set up your child for success. Place your toddler on the toilet at specific times of day - first thing in the morning, right before or after a nap, and right before bed.

6. Be patient. Some children become urine-trained before becoming stool-trained. Other children wet the bed up to age 7 or 8. All children develop and accept change differently.


Tips:
Reward your child for making it to the potty.

If your child has an accident on the floor or in training pants, use gentle, encouraging words. Let your child know that he or she is learning something new and that accidents are OK.

Read toilet-training books for kids together to show your toddler that other children learn this skill, too.

Answer 4

This may be hard for you but hold him responsible for the clean up. He can take off his diaper, wipe (take a bath before bed), put the soiled diaper in the trash, put on a new diaper. He is fighting you because he knows this is something you really want to happen and because it is something that only he can control. If you insist, he will resist. I don't believe in treats either. I can't believe so my parents do this!

Count the remained of his diapers with him. Say "After 10 more diapers you get to use the toilet." Get him some "big boy" underwear and put him into clothing he can easily take on and off BY HIMSELF. Put him into the underwear. Get him a step stool so he can get up onto the toilet (if he can't do so now). When you see him doing the "potty dance" say to him "It looks like you need to use the bathroom." Say nothing more than that. If he soils his clothing, hold him responsible for the cleanup. Say "It looks like you need to change." He can remove the soiled clothing, wash them, put them in the laundry, clean up any mess, and put on clean clothing. Try not to help him. It won't take long for him to learn it is much easier to use the bathroom. Good luck!

Answer 5

Have you tried pull-ups? That will give him a little control over the situation, but if he poops in them, you can tear them at the sides and change them like a diaper. Maybe make a chart and if he does something in the potty, he gets to put one or two stickers, depending on what he did, on the chart, and when he gets a certain number, he gets a prize, like a small toy.

Answer 6

The kid feels threatened when you change a diaper. This could happen because of ONE bad experience he had. We just don't know. The best thing to do is to distract him. Have someone else wave something colorful or elaborate over his head while you change it. Afterwards, give the baby a kiss and say "good boy" or something along the lines. Try to make Jason laugh while you change the diaper as well. He needs to feel more relaxed and needs to know that he can trust you.

Answer 7

I went throught the samething. hide the diapers. Tell him that you are out. Buy about 5 diffrent kinds on underwear with his favorite charecters on them then ask him what he wants to wear. Leave it at that. DO NOT PUSH THE POTTY THING. Everytime that he has an accident ask him if the feels yucky and ank him if it is smelly then without getting mad help him get changed. DO NOT GET MAD! It gives him control. Now that the weather as a whole is getting better it is a great lesson to learn outside!!!! Let him aim ar a tree.

Answer 8

i would recommend the diapers: Feel and Learns, and/or Pull-ups. Feel and Learns for when he does his duty, he'll get the feeling of his...stuff... and that might change his mind about diapers. Pull ups are easier for potty training. And if all else fails, take away the diapers and make him sit on the toilet (supervise him) untill he goes poop or pee or both.

Answer 9

Read him a book or a few books when he's sitting on the potty it will help him to relax. Once he does his first wee or poop you have to make a big deal out of it and tell him how clever he is and how proud you are, so that he will want to do it again!!

Answer 10

sorry but i'm afraid you'll have to be prepared for a mess. the best way for a kid to learn to use the potty is to hate being wet/dirty. the best way would be to let them wear underware (ummm you may need 100 pairs to get through two days...) and feel the wet and the dirty, dislike it and WANT to go on the potty. it's got to be their choice.
if he is not aware of his bodily functions you can help by pointing out, (e.g. in the bathtub) "hey look you're pee-ing... can we try that in the toilet?"
it takes lots of perseverance.
good luck!