I have been full time with my 2 1/2 year old son since he was born. I am considering going back to teaching (9 months, 8-3:30), but am so torn! We have no family near, so I am very concerned about daycare. I wouldn't even know how to start looking, and can't imaging leaving my son. But I know millions of families do it everyday, and it would be a great relief to us to have my salary and benefits again. Adding to this dilemma is that my husband and I would like to start trying for #2 soon. I'd love to hear from moms who went through similar situations - I'd like to know what you decided and how it turned out for you.
2006-06-14 09:25:24 · 13 answers · asked by bigskymom 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Ok I have two points of view here:
1. I was in this situations my daughter was 3 and my son was 10 months, I chose to go back to work. I work in the daycare field so I knew what to look for. The best way to get a good feel of the program is to make several visits. Don't just go once and make up your mind. Also, find out what time many of the kids are picked up and try to talk to parents. All daycares are governed by the Dept. Of Child Development. Do a search to get your state's and use it as an information tool. It will tell if they have violations and you can also tell if they have had any complaints against them.
2. Like I stated, I am in the childcare field, I work w/ school age children. Many children that haven't ever been away from mom, dad or other family member, they have a hard time adjusting to school. If he gets a chance to spend time w/ other people I just think that school wouldn't be as big of a shock
This is really just an age old question...Which mom is better the stay at home mom or the working mom?
2006-06-14 09:34:55 · answer #1 · answered by SouthernKNC 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I worked until my first daughter was born and then thought about working again but it didn't make a lot of sense for us:
My income wouldn't really add anything after paying for daycare, my working wardrobe, gas for commuting and the increased amount of eating out we'd do if I weren't home cooking meals.
Plus, I knew I'd want to stay home at least while nursing baby #2, if we ever had a second baby and I didn't want to stop nursing early just to go back to work. Besides, if we got used to two incomes then we'd have no choices if times got tough. By staying home, at least we'd always have the option of me working if it came to that.
Eventually, we decided that we wanted to homeschool which sealed my fate as an SAHM! Now I have six children, aged 11 down to 7 months and don't even want to go back to work. I get to teach every day and be with my kiddos, too. The way it worked out, my husband ended up switching careers (something we never could have foreseen when our first was a baby) and makes three times as much as he did then, so financially God provided for me to be where I wanted to all along!
2006-06-14 16:34:41 · answer #2 · answered by susie q 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My girlfriend went through the same thing with her twins. She is also a teacher and after a lot of hard consideration she decided to go back to work. However, she decided to teach special needs instead of 6th grade because she felt the at home work load (test prep, correcting papers, etc.) would be less. This did work out well for her.
I am also a full time working mother of 2. However, I am very lucky because I have my mom who watchs my kids. She also has done daycare from her home for 25 years. The best advise I can give you with finding daycare is to follow you gut and make an unanounced visit to give you piece of mind.
good luck.
Leslie
2006-06-14 16:34:20 · answer #3 · answered by luvmyjilljosh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Which do you really want, especially with the prospect of trying for #2?
This is never an easy decision. My choice was to first do medical transcription at home, which eventually led to running my home business in an entirely different field.
I don't blame moms for whichever choice they make. Staying at home is hard because of the financial stresses and the way some people view SAHMs as lazy. Work outside the home and the SAHMs say you aren't taking proper care of your child.
I truly believe that every parent is capable of making the best decision for their family. Not everyone will agree with you, no matter what you decide. So long as you provide a loving home for your children you are being a good parent.
2006-06-15 15:32:53 · answer #4 · answered by Home with the Kids 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With the things that are going on with children these days, if you were to place your child into daycare, wait until he can talk. God forbid, but just in case something does happen to your child, we need him to be able to tell you what happened or what is wrong with him. If you're planning to have baby #2 anytime soon, then I think you should wait before you go back to work. See if you can work from home or start your own biz and work from home. My mother was a stay at home mom and of her five children, only one strayed. My aunt worked. Of her four children, three strayed. I have a sister that worked during her children's toddle years, but she had family to help her. Now that they are a little older, she works during the time they are school, so she's home with them. Raising children in today's society needs all of the parental time and care that children can get.
2006-06-14 16:33:37 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is a very hard choice to make. On one hand your son will acctually benifit from being in childcare, he will be more ready for the challanges of school (making friends, sharing..ect) The benifits from your job are always a nice bonus.
I was home with my son till he was 3 and my daughter was 1, i returned to work was home by 3 pm. I gotta say it was a good choice for my family. I would do the same thing again if I was given the choice. Good luck.
2006-06-14 16:34:25 · answer #6 · answered by marhaschmidt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am not a mom but i think you are very brave. you should start your search immediately. all the while pep talking your son so that he can understand look for a daycare with bright colours on the walls. see if the other children have bright and shining eyes. pop in unannounced to see how the teachers deal with different situations. while you are at home try quarter day and gradually send your son half day and then full day. your son will love it. children adjust quickly. Good Luck
2006-06-14 17:00:09 · answer #7 · answered by mumtaz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can afford it money wise stay home-nothing can replace a mothers full time love and affection. You should really stay home especially if you are thinking about having another child. Why start working again, if you only have to turn around and quit when you have the second baby???
2006-06-14 16:31:42 · answer #8 · answered by SidTheKid 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are already talking about child # 2 soon, then there is your answer. There is no reason to start back for salary purposes when the second arrives it will be next to impossible to return to work and pay daycare and gas, ect.... Just have fun, raise your babies and the minute they hit kindergarten, take off to work!!!!!
2006-06-14 16:30:21 · answer #9 · answered by educated guess 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try asking other women (who work outside the home that you know) what they do with their kids and then interview the day care providers they give you information on. Choose the one you like the best, and don't rush into it...that person will be taking care of your baby!
Definitely go back to work if you feel like it!
2006-06-14 16:30:21 · answer #10 · answered by Brutally Honest 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋