another stupid question?

Question

~If it is zero degrees out today, and it's supposed to be twice as cold out tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
~ How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
~ If a woman w/multiple personalities threatens to kill herself, is it considered a hostage situation?
~If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
~Is there a Dr. Salt?
~What happens if you get scared half-to-death twice?
~Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
~

Answer 1

COWGIRL ASKS:

~If it is zero degrees out today, and it's supposed to be twice as cold out tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

AND THE SURVEY SAYS:

Brr, BRRRR!!

COWGIRL ASKS:~ How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?

FROM THE MINDS OF MILLIONS WE LEARN:

Silly! If you push harder it works. Ask anyone if they don't think it works better when you push harder.


COWGIRL ASKS:~ ~ If a woman w/multiple personalities threatens to kill herself, is it considered a hostage situation?

DR. FREUD'S FILES REVEAL:

No, it's a family problem and we should all be understanding, but for crying out loud don't ask her father to intervene. He's the one that caused it to begin with!


COWGIRL ASKS:~ ~If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

THE AD COUNCIL EXPLAINS:

If you don't get it, then ask Avis.

COWGIRL ASKS:~ ~Is there a Dr. Salt?

WE SEARCHED THE GRADUATION RECORDS AND:

Dr. Pepper make Salt sneeze so badly in grad school he gave up trying and became a Morton Missionary.

COWGIRL ASKS:~ ~What happens if you get scared half-to-death twice?

WRITERS FOR "FEAR FACTOR" TELL US:

Lots of really funny stuff - especially when the girls wet their pants at the worst possible moments, or the guys gag and barf on others. All these are kept with other "out-take" material on secret recordings in the headquarters of Blackmail, Inc.

COWGIRL ASKS:~ ~Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

PROF. DINGLEKLOPFER EXPLAINS:

Because Mommy taught us that way and that's good enough for everyone else. What's the matter with you? You think the keyboard letter series makes better sense? Just TRY singing "Q, W, E, R, T, Y-Y-Y-Y!" It doesn't scan, you silly nincompoop! You RUINED the song! We're going to tell your Mommy about you!

Answer 2

~ How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
The signal goes weaker with less power, by continuing to press the button use send more of the weak signal...eventually hitting your target.
~ If a woman w/multiple personalities threatens to kill herself, is it considered a hostage situation? Suicide....just ask a cop.
~If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? The 2 is the designation of the softness of the lead. #4 is very hard, andtherefore very light.
~Is there a Dr. Salt? yes. he lives in colorado.
~What happens if you get scared half-to-death twice?Then you are 1/4 alive. (half of a half is a quarter.
~Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?It is baesed upon an older song.
~

Answer 3

LOL,
1. -Zerodytwo
2. I don't I usually throw the remote across the room when the batteries give out
3. Yes
4.Because they're still working on the prototype #1 pencil
5. Yes, Dr Salt lives next door to me, and his first name is Azz, and he often verbally attacks me when I'm outside doing yard work.
6. No one has survived to tell about being half scared to death twice.
7. No it's because the Muppet's wanted it that way:)

Answer 4

Clone Problem

With the advances in cloning I presume humans shall be next.
This brings us to the BIG question.
If you push your naked clone off the top of a tall building, would it be?

A) Murder?

B) Suicide?

C) Merely making an obscene clone fall?

Answer 5

Like when Paddy broke his arm in two places. Peter asked him what he was going to do. 'I'll be fu*ked if I ever go back to them two places' answered Paddy.

Answer 6

first a negative (-) , plus the nuber of degree's of cold air

Answer 7

Why do you drive on the parkway, and park in the driveway?

Answer 8

none of the above

Answer 9

Why do moths sleep in the day when they are attracted to light??

Huh??? huh????