my boyfriend and i have been friends for 3 years. Sometime last year we became friends with benefits and it worked out fine. A month ago he says he wants more and so now we have a relatoinship which is wat i always wanted. But he still lives like hes single. He puts his friends and partying before me. Big events that come up i receive no invite. Yet he tells everyone we're dating and blah blah blah. Ive mentioned to him before that if he wnats to go back to the way things were i would be fine but he says no he wants to be with me. What do i have to do to make him more in this relationship?
2006-06-14 08:53:18 · 15 answers · asked by andrea lynn 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Put your needs before his. He has been doing this throughout your entire relationship---it's your turn now. Move on if you don't get what you want, you deserve the best.
2006-06-14 08:59:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Have you ever heard the saying "why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?"
He's getting *everything* he wants out of you and he doesn't have to commit, act responsibly, or make any sacrifices. Why should he do anything more? Based on what you say, it also sounds like you won't leave him anytime soon so he has no incentive to change.
#1 Stop depending on this guy for your happiness. You don't need anyone to make you happy. Decide to find happiness within yourself & your own life. Once you develop confidence and internal happiness, good men will be seeking you out.
#2 Work on self respect. Realise you deserve better. You don't have to settle for him. There are so many CARING men in the world, why waste your short life on this one?
#3 Friends with benefits never works. One person always somehow gets
more out of the arrangement. In the meantime two people who would never plan a life together are risking bringing a life into the world. Wouldn't it suck if you got pregnant?
Bottom line: kick this guy to the curb!
2006-06-14 16:07:19 · answer #2 · answered by Funchy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're both still young which is evident in your post. Also, keep this in mind, boys are looking for sex. That's just the reality of life. If you want to be in a serious relationship, wait until you are older, then look for a man who is ready to settle down. In the mean time, just enjoy life, go out and have fun. There is plenty of time to settle down. Always use protection, something the kids now days downplay and pay for later. Educate yourself for a better future.
2006-06-14 15:58:33 · answer #3 · answered by jimmyweda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him know that you are serious, and if he's not yall should just be friends without benefits. I really don't like friends with benefits, I think the person is useing each other for sex that what I think.
2006-06-14 15:58:52 · answer #4 · answered by angle2005star 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He definetely sounds like he doesn't really know what he wants. Tell him to make up his mind. He must really care about you though cause if he didn't he wouldn't say he wanted to be with you. Tell him how you feel. If he loves you he'll CHANGE. good luck, I really hope it works out for you.
2006-06-14 16:28:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
cuz some guys are so low that they need a gf to feel better but still want to be open and date other girls boys are dumb go single for a while
2006-06-14 15:56:33 · answer #6 · answered by cheeto 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can't go from being a piece of a** to girl friend
won't happen
he only told you that it a "relationship" so you wouldn't be with anyone else
but he is
move on or keep being a piece of a**
2006-06-14 15:58:16 · answer #7 · answered by swddrb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hate to say it but sometimes an altumatum...either be with me or don't!
Sometimes guys need that. He may walk, and you need to be prepared for that, but you can't let him treat you like that. Been there, it sucks!
2006-06-14 16:01:05 · answer #8 · answered by ♥ Sarah Bear ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm guessing that to him you're still a friend with benefits and only mentions you at his girlfriend as certain times and these certain times are probably beneficial to him, no doubt! no, dump him. leave him,
2006-06-14 15:56:12 · answer #9 · answered by tinerr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't treat the cow any better when it's giving out plenty of milk. When it stops giving milk, I treat it better. Understand?
2006-06-14 16:01:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋