My girlfriend of a year dumped me about a month ago. (We're both 21) She said she didn't know if she was in love enough and it wasn't getting better. I know she had been talkin to her friends because she was worried about regretting not being single down the road. She had been on vacation for a while so that gave her time to think and I feel like she downplayed what we had. We had an awesome relationship, I gave it everything I had and everyone thought we were the perfect couple. I feel like it was over b4 it began because I was her first... She tells me that if we are meant to be she will just realize it one day down the road (years even she says). Is that realistic? I feel like the love we had will just be forgotten and replaced. Has anyone had experiance from her perspective where they realized they made a mistake? She told me she doesnt expect me to wait which I'm not but I don't want her to be the one that got away because I can see myself with her in the long run...
2006-06-14 08:19:42 · 4 answers · asked by Matt J 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Most likely you are not the best possible match to her and other way around. You can see yourself with her in a long run but you are not 100% sure. Being so young you both failed to work on relationship by asking right questions. And sometimes the best is to separate before it is too late and you make more mistakes to regret later and make your life miserable art least for part of it. One thing I am sure- you know it when you meet your second half. Let the old relationship go, enjoy your favored activities and you will meet the right person; or you might miss somebody who is truly meant for you while chasing something what is not meant to happen anyway.
2006-06-14 08:39:33 · answer #1 · answered by mini golf blonde 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are now where I was at 23. The girl I thought was everything said the same to me but I persisted. We married and it lasted 37 years.
Now before you take and run with that please understand it was a mistake but only I didn't know it. She did not feel for me the way she should have but she gave in.
I found out years later that within the first 5 to 10 years she had 7 affairs. Very good at covering it up as I suspected nothing. Very little in my life was more painful even though it had been many years. I even had to see a counselor but did get through it. We stayed together until about 4 years ago.
She had another affair and that was that.
I had my share of blame but please trust me you do not want to go through this. If she has doubts now...it will only get worse.
When she tells you she doesn't expect you to wait....believe her.....move on.
Walk away now while you can find the perfect girl.
Check out this web site. If only I would have had this when I was 23.
2006-06-14 08:58:07 · answer #2 · answered by John B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can speak from a similar experience to what you are going through. my girlfriend did not dump me (because she said that she was not ready to dump me yet) but told me that she would not be ready to pursue any sort of relationship for "maybe 20-30 years" with me other than the occasional date. She also told me that if we were meant to be, that we would be down the road when she was ready, and equally said that she did not expect me to wait. These are the things that i did not want to hear, because i truly love her, and i was hurt and upset at these comments, among others. Our relationship, too, was fantastic, and i put in everything i have to keep us strong. One day, in the not too distant past, she told me that she realized just how valuable our relationship really was, and that she wanted to make me happy, and let me make her happy. She wants to be with me much sooner now (as soon as we both finish college), and she is putting in exactly what i have been putting in. Basically, for her, it did just click that i was her one true love. For me, i knew it in my heart from the very beginning. I could see that there was something very special about her, and once we began our relationship, i knew that we had something special and unique; something that i never want to lose. Basically, for both me and her, you realize your love and when you are with your true love because it is a feeling deep down that you can not quite explain. You can just feel that it is right. The only advice that anyone can give you in this situation is to follow your heart. That is all that matters. Do what is for your own, and for her own, greater good.
2006-06-14 08:35:40 · answer #3 · answered by pilotmanitalia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I'm sorry this happened to you, but I had a very similar experience a long time ago, I'm not that young you could say and I was in your ex-g/f situation I just relaized that he was not the one for me, but he was the one to lose my virginity with. Basically it was a win-win situation for me and a win-lose for him. Please take your time and begin searching for that one again. Only time will tell, but I don't think you'll will ever had what you once had and you are to sweet of a guy to be alone. You are now single and should be ready for mingling again!
2006-06-14 08:25:31 · answer #4 · answered by lasugarfree 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋