My bf and I have been together for almost 4 years. Throughout our whole relationship I have taken care of him in every way but he doesn't seem to appreciate anything I've done for him. We know each other so well but sometimes when he tells me he loves me it just feels like his hearts really not in it anymore. Anything and everything is more important to him than making our relationship better. He still holds me tight at night and our feet always meet at the end of the bed every night, I just feel like maybe he isn't attracted to me anymore. We have sex about 4 times a week but he never makes me feel good about myself. Does he really love me or just staying with me because it is convienant? He never leaves me or treats me like he is cheating, he just isn't always emotionally supportive. I really do love him and want to make this relationship work. Is my relationship over inside or is he just the type of guy who doesn't really know how to show his love? Keep in mind he is 19 and I am 22.
2006-06-14 08:15:34 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you already kmnow the answer- just walk away and find a mature man.
2006-06-14 08:18:02 · answer #1 · answered by grisgris100 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok first of all he is Younger than you, and therefore more immature. Guys are slower in maturing.I have been married for 4.5 years now, and I have the same issues that you are experiencing. Although I must admit I have asked advice for same reasons. If you want to be appreciated, please let him know what it is that you would like him to do for you. If you love him and he loves you, you guys should be able to talk. If you think he is staying with you because of convenience, then maybe you should ask him to leave? Or like I said, talk to him about your concerns, and go from there. I find that writting down what I feel and what I think I feel, sometimes helps me to understand better what I want. Sometimes I write 9 page letters and realize at the end that I don't feel that way anymore. Hang in there and try to not make things so easy for him. Spending money sometimes helps me feel better, but it's just a cover up.
2006-06-14 15:24:47 · answer #2 · answered by spawanee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like it is your first serious relationship. Being in love means that special feeling you both have. When you hear his voice does your heart skip a beat. Do you find yourself watching him sleep? My boyfriend will just stroke my head while I fall asleep. I feel safe with him. He is very mature and would never hold back on his feelings. You are young and should experience more life before you "settle" for someone who does not treat you like a goddess. Have fun and live your life. If he is the one, you will find each other again. We did and are getting married next year. Best wishes. Feel free to email if you need to talk more. Good Luck.
2006-06-14 15:23:22 · answer #3 · answered by lovesaragon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you have the nagging feeling in your brain, it is usually right. Convenience is definitely a reason people stay in relationships. Unless there is some factor you are not revealing, I would get out of the relationship. I almost made a similar mistake with a convenience realationship, but thank God my ex ended it. I am so much happier, and have met someone who is perfect for me. You are definitely young enough to find someone else.
2006-06-14 15:20:55 · answer #4 · answered by danno73 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The age thing could be a factor. He is a young male that probably isn't ready to commit. He is cheating or has cheated. Now you just have to prepare yourself for the inevidable. My buddy has a drop dead gorgeous wife. Personal trainer, not an inch of fat, takes care of him. But you know what, he cheats all the time. His response is that if he wanted some to thake care of him he would've stayed living with his mom.
2006-06-14 15:22:57 · answer #5 · answered by Alex S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is just a guy that does not know how to show his love, most guys are like that ... but what do you mean by taking care of him? Financially? If so, you need to get rid of that 4 year butt-munch. But if you mean emotional ...all that jazz - guys are just stupid like that. If he holds you everynight and you have sex, chances are good he loves you with his heart. Stop being so paranoid, he really does love you. Keep in mind though, that he is 22. Guys become strange and confused at that age ...Believe Me! Don't worry, like I said, if you don't mean that you have taken care of him financially, all is well. But if so ...
2006-06-14 15:22:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I work with a comedian and author who I think can help. Any interest in appearing on TV? He often addresses this very issue. Have you read "he's just not that into you" or "It's Called A Breakup Because It's Broken"? Could be helpful. Let me know what you think.
2006-06-14 15:20:08 · answer #7 · answered by chictvproducer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is just in a rutt. You guys need to get out and do new things together to spice things up alittle. Him being 19, if he didnt love you he would have found someone else by now.
2006-06-14 15:31:53 · answer #8 · answered by bigdog_0032 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He takes you for granted, talk to him about your feeling. Get counseling if you have to, try some new things out, do some role playing.
But why when you were 18 were you having sex with a 15 year old?
2006-06-14 15:21:38 · answer #9 · answered by anvilsandinkstudios 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uhh yeah hes 19 and its sounds like he has gotten bored with you and wants something different. mix things up in the bed room. play some sex games or get a sexy little outfit and strip for him. i hope this will help.
2006-06-14 15:19:14 · answer #10 · answered by jmon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is young he may not know what he wants i was that way when i was 19 but all you can do is let things go its way PS he is young think about this sorry if i can't be more help to you and good luck
2006-06-14 15:30:50 · answer #11 · answered by daretostaire 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋