Why does my 3 1/2 year old son behave perfectly for his dad but throws fits and doesnt' want to listen to me?

Question

But he seems to "like" me better because he always wants to sit in my lap, or have me give him a bath or read to him and not his dad. i don't get it. Any ideas??

Answer 1

Are you being consistent with him? Are you setting limits and following through every time? Does "No" mean "No" the first time you say it or are you offering him chances? Often times, fathers are more consistent, set limits and follow through, and mean "no" when they say it. Your child could be aware of this and so he does not test his dad. Some parents want their child to "like" them and give in a lot (get them the newest toy or cartoon). Does this sound like you? You want your child to respect you. Children need limits for them to respect you. Try to start being more consistent with him (set limits, follow through, not offer chances...) and see if this helps.

If you want him to have his father read to him and give baths, it is okay for you to tell him that "Mommy can't read (give a bath) to you now but you can ask daddy to." Explain that his father would love to do so. It will take some time for him to get used to the idea. Good luck!

Answer 2

My son is 2 1/2 and is really pretty good relatively speaking but children boys or girls are mostly if not always going to mind the male figure in the house its just the authority that they respect but you should not tolerate your child to throw fits. You may even have his dad talk to him about it and let him know its not accepted for a boy to talk to/act like that his mother. The adults need to be on one accord that will help as well. Good luck

Answer 3

We have a similiar situation in our house with our 5 year old and 23 month old. I am very consistent with discipline. If I tell them I am going to send them to their room or take away books at bedtime for continuing bad behavior, I follow through with it. My wife doesn't. If you say you are going to do something, follow through. They're smart, they pick up quick. My wife gets stressed out dealing with them and they test her all the time, but she, I think at times, is afraid to be "mean" to them. I tell her all the time, we're not here to be their friends, we're their parents.

Set limits and follow through. Don't be afraid to discipline. And I don't think it's a gender issue. My mother and father raised us the same way and we didn't give either a whole lot of problems.

Answer 4

I have the same problem with my 4 year old son. And I know exactly why. I let him get away with more stuff. Im trying to be tougher though. Dad doesnt let him get away with anything. I think its normal.

Answer 5

I think that almost all mom will be having the same problem as you are, I know I am. I think that dads disaplin children more and moms kinda pick up the peices. Maybe you can be stern buy than make sure he knows you still love him.

Answer 6

I am having the same problem with my son who just turned 4. I think he knows he can't get by with pitching fits with his dad because he is bigger and he knows I don't spank as hard and I tend to let things slid when my husband doesn't budge.

Answer 7

He could be afraid of his dad, and not you. You are the "nice" parent. Are you letting him get away with stuff? Ask your husband how he disciplines your kid. Start getting stricter with your child.

My nieces do the same thing. They are a totally different bunch when their Dad is around. Freaky.

Answer 8

I use to do that when I was little I liked my mom better. But you could kind of trick buy him toys candy etc.

Answer 9

I think it has to do with their tone of voice, I have the same problem with my son and he isn't even two yet!

Answer 10

Because he knows daddy means business and he doesn't take you seriously probably because you hug and kiss him so much, that you're not seen as a threat. lol