My boyfriend and I are having some issues because he feels that because of my two kids whom i had with somebody else (two years ago before him)...he feels that he can't make love with me eventhough it was everyday because the thought of somebody else doing that to me and me mistakinly by accident having two kids is just too much for him to handle....he says that he wont leave me and that he is here to stay but he doesnt know if he can do that again....although i went to the OBGYN on monday to see about birth control, the shot, when i told him that i might not be going because i didnt seem the point...he said well if you plan for this to get back to the way it is supposed to be why not get it...does this mean that he and i will be normal again soon.....????...is it normal fo rhim to feel this way and for me to feel soo icky and discusted with myself because of how he feels?
2006-06-14 01:47:51 · 11 answers · asked by I Know I Know 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My boyfriend and I are having some issues because he feels that because of my two kids whom i had with somebody else (two years ago before him)...he feels that he can't make love with me eventhough my bf and i made love everyday. he says the thought of somebody else getting me pregnant by accident is just too much for him to handle....he says that he wont leave me and that he is here to stay but he doesnt know if he can do that again....although i went to the OBGYN on monday to see about birth control, the shot, when i told him that i might not be getting the shot after all because i didnt seem the point...he said well if you plan for this to get back to the way it is supposed to be why not get it...does this mean that he and i will be normal again soon.....????...is it normal for him to feel this way and for me to feel soo icky and discusted with myself because of how he feels?
2006-06-14 02:27:17 · update #1
the problem isn't with you. it's with him. why should you feel shameful for having your children? if he doesn't want to have sex with you because you had children before him (even though he has had sex with you before) then there is something else going on. you should look into what he is doing when he isn't with you.
and while you are at it, find a better man. one who will love your kids. not make you feel ashamed of having them.
2006-06-14 01:56:24 · answer #1 · answered by Knocked Up 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First there are no children born by accident. Second, he is acting childish and that means that you will probably be dumped at the first signs of trouble or when you need him most. You should move on now. Finally, you will not listen to this advice because in your mind it is not what you want to hear and you have made up your mind and you are just looking for some support. If you have not made up your mind then think about your future with this guy. Will there be new drama every time you discuss your past? You should never feel guilty about your past. You lived it, learned from it now do something about your future.
2006-06-14 08:55:49 · answer #2 · answered by David007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you saying you went to the OBGYN for a birth control shot & then decided not to get the shot? And you don't see the point of getting the shot - because your boyfriend won't have sex with you & he doesn't want more kids with you ? Your question is very hard to read. I think you are saying you want him to have sex with you with no birth control & he won't. It sounds like he is smarter than you & he should get out of the relationship unless you smarten up.
2006-06-14 09:02:59 · answer #3 · answered by justplaying 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he has issues, and the problem is that he not a man, if he was
then there would not be a issue. he knew about the children
before you got together,now it a problem. the question is why
are you putting up with hm. he has the problem not you,and if
really love you then he would accept the situation, because
it not going any where, and he cant handle it, then may be he
should not be there. but he need counseling. it not going to get
any better until you both talk to someone about what really going
on.
2006-06-25 01:43:33 · answer #4 · answered by jazzsinger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're boyfriend sounds messed up and you should probably leave him. He knew you had the kids - so now he is making excuses for not making love to you? He is a moron. This guy certainly does not sound like he deserves you. I have read your other questions in regards to him - and my best advice is just move along with a guy who will not play mind games with you. My husband took on me and my 2 boys and he considers us all blessings!
2006-06-15 10:05:57 · answer #5 · answered by bluskygreengrass 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he has no right to make you feel this way. everyone has a past. if he loves you he should accept that and love you as you are. something is wrong with him, that he feels he can't touch you because you had sex with someone else. what's he gonna do? date only virgins? good luck with that. i think you should try to find someone else. you need a man that will be there for you and be there for your kids. he has too many issues. you don't need another child to put up with.
2006-06-14 08:52:27 · answer #6 · answered by sarah 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow I'm sorry but I dont understand your question at all! What??? Your boyfriend wont have sex with you?? OK find another man! If its because you have kids, he's got some problems!!! WOW
2006-06-14 08:54:02 · answer #7 · answered by face9202004 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that if he is going to treat you like that am basically say that you are "used" goods he is not the right man for you. he may love you and your kids but is not in love with you. and if you chose to stay with him you will be settling and may miss the man that is the right one for you
2006-06-14 08:55:28 · answer #8 · answered by ariel_db 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is either inexperienced or he's messing with your mind.
who ever heard of a guy refusing to do sex because you had two kids already?
2006-06-14 08:50:41 · answer #9 · answered by leadbelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me get this straight. he slept with u cuz he cudnt think of you in an other sexual relationship b4 him?! Is he worth your time?
2006-06-14 09:07:37 · answer #10 · answered by Phoenix21 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋