how can i make him more willing to make love to me without being pushy??

Question

My boyfriend and I are in a mess right now...and we are currently not making love because he feels that he can't do that because i have two children with somebody else...he says that eventhough we used to everyday that right now he just cant and he doesnt know if he ever will...i told him that when he was ready to just tell me or have me have his hand on the places he wants me to touch....how can i make him more willing to make love to me without being pushy...

Answer 1

he's moved past the lust/infatuation phase of the relationship and is now thinking of your relationship in terms of more than sex. Now that the relationship is moving on into more commitment and intimacy, he is dealing within himself to work with his own emotions. Men are notoriously bad at recognizing, let alone working with their own emotions.

Regardless of what he is doing, do what you need to do for your own good. If it means seducing him, great. If it means sitting down and talking with him in a no pressure way about how it is bothering you, then do that. Just make sure to let him know what you need to do and that it is for your good - not as a reaction to his actions.

Answer 2

Now did you have these kids while you were together? If so shame on you. Most men are territorial and the idea of another man on his woman does not sit well. Now if these kids were before him and the sex between you 2 was everyday and then stopped, I am pretty sure that the excusse of the kids is a cover for something else.

Answer 3

Sounds like he has the problem.....I am married to someone that has two children by someone else. I really don't see how that is a problem, unless he can't handle the ex. It's called a 'Red Herring'. Sounds to me like you need to move on....

If you did not want to make love to him, is there any way he could make you more willing? Not likely. He has to be willing on his on. Let him work out his issues, but it shouldn't take forever...

Answer 4

I dont know the whole story, it sounds like a sorry excuse for someone who doesnt want to have sex with you anymore. If he did it before everyday then hes lying. Maybe hes just using you? I dont know if he lives with you ? uses your car? for money? Think about it do you have stuff that he doesnt have, is he freeloading? Or maybe he could be seeing someone else.

Answer 5

well, if he can't 'make love' to you because you your children, then he can't really love you in any aspect. are you sure that he isn't cheating on you? i'm not coming up with any reason why this didn't bother him before. tell him that he can either love you in all aspects for who you are and what you have, or let you find someone who will.

Answer 6

if he is sayin he wont touch you because you have kids by another man after yall have already done it then its plan n simple sweety he is getting it some place else sad but true. and if not then he is gay. ya could always try just pulling it out and goin to town.

Answer 7

He's saying that he can't have sex with you because you have children? Tell him to go fly a kite... that if he loved you he would love you no matter what... and he probably already knew you had children before he decided taht he "can't" do it... what a LOSER!

Answer 8

My you are a controlling person! Listen to what he is saying girl. He don't want to! How dare you want to trick him into it. How about concentrating on those two kids and leave him alone.

Answer 9

My advice is to be so sexy he cant refuse, we're guys we can only hold out so long. N if the sex is great he cant say no

Answer 10

be more flirtatious, make him see the beauty in you. U know wear sexy clothes, things that will turn him on!Then he will have no doubts about you and making love.