I just became more than friends with a friend and i found out she has some psychological issues, i noticed cuts on her arms and i finally found out that she gets stressed out and cuts herself which is a huge shock to me. She is on medication but it doesn't always work and she literally digs into her arms with a knife. I am the only other person that knows about this than her sister. Why would she trust me this much to tell me something so personal? we have only known eachother for about 6 months. Now i am afraid not to call her everyday and i never don't answer her calls because i don't want her to do anything crazy. This is like a huge burden on me, i mean i like her a lot but i am walking on egg shells here because i don't know what to tell her or why she told me about this. what should i do? and why did she tell me(a relatively new person in her life) about something so personal?
2006-06-13 15:47:24 · 3 answers · asked by Dund pund se 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First - she trusts you. She shared something that is painful and private for her. You must be someone who won't ridicule or abandon her - for her to share that kind of thing with you.
Cutting is so similar to gambling or alcoholism - it is an addiction to escape her own inner pain. She cuts to have pain on the outside, instead of hearing the demons of pain in her head.
Finally, you are not responsible for anything she does. Stop walking on eggshells. Be a friend. Act as you would normally. She is responsible for her own actions, even if they are compulsive and harmful to herself. Call only as much as you would normally. Don't treat her any differently than any other friend. Be aware that she has a problem and that she has shown you a trust to let you into that world. If she 'does something crazy' - it is not your fault, regardless of what you do or don't do.
It is actually becoming more and more common that young women are doing this kind of action to themselves. It happens across all types of people, from the poorest to the Princeton 4.0 students.
2006-06-13 16:10:48 · answer #1 · answered by DW 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
She trusts you with the secret and I know it can be a huge burden. Tell her how you feel and that you can't relax in the relationship because you are worried so much about what she's doing. Tell her that you will always be there for her if she needs to talk or destress in some manner other than cutting but if she continues to cut, you may feel like you can't carry that burden.
2006-06-13 15:55:27 · answer #2 · answered by Cheryl K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably told you as a cry for help. Cutting herself is a visible sign of the emotional agony she is suffering. She needs to see a therapist regularly until she stops cutting.
BTW, it is a very common disorder among young women. Much more common than people know.
2006-06-13 15:53:53 · answer #3 · answered by soccerfamilys 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋