Anyone out there?

Question

Recently, i walked in on my brother wearing my cheerleading outfit... i tried speaking with him and asking him why he was doing this, and he said it mqakes him feel better about himself... I am not against cross-dressing, or gay/lesbian... but what do i do... this is very expensive, and i dont want him to feel ashamed of this...

Answer 1

I think you handled it very well - not everyone is so well informed about cross dressing and transvestitism.

I would suggest you offer to take your brother shopping - you can go to a second hand store like Value VIllage, and pretend you're shopping for you if it makes him more comfortable. That way he won't borrow your things. (If he still lives at home with you and your parents, offer to store his new clothes in your room as he is probably not ready to tell mom & dad about his tastes.) Think of it this way - if he was your sister and was wearing your clothes, you'd be a bit ticked off - especially if you weren't asked first. It's a matter of respect for personal property.

You may also want to talk to PFLAG - Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays - and so may he. While crossdressing is not the same as homosexuality, it is still a little out of the ordinary and he probably is dying to talk to someone else who shares his liking for female clothes.

You sound like a great sister.

Answer 2

Maybe you have conflicting thoughts about this; you might have to really evaluate how you feel about this. On one hand you say "I don't want him to feel ashamed about this..." but on the other hand you sau "this is very expensive ..." A little conflicting feelings. Perhaps resentful because he tried on your cheerleading outfit and might damage it in some way. While at the same time feeling sorry for him.

Don't know if you can have it both ways. Perhaps you should consult someone outside the family to discuss this with?

Answer 3

Just talk to your brother about things you don't understand, there's really nothing you can do, he is what he is and the best thing to do is be supportive of the people in your family. Everybody works differently, think how it makes you feel when you get dressed up to go out and it gives you self confidence, that might be what your bro. is looking for. Who knows why girls clothes do that for him and it probably doesn't matter, but in the long run knowing that he has a sister who cares about his well-being will make whatever he is going through easier.

Answer 4

Whats very expensive? Your cheerleading uniform? lol
Tell him that you except who he is and the fact that he feels he needs this to feel comfortable with himself. Encourage him to find a group with people he can relate to (you could show your support by helping him find these groups).
Also, you should make a bro/sis night out of it and watch "Glen or Glenda"- trust me he'll love it ;)

Answer 5

generally women's clothing are a better quality and have a better hand (feel). Take him to a store that caters to people of color and get him some dress pants and silk shirts, they still like to dress better than most white people for formal times.

Answer 6

Looks like your up the creek w/o a paddle.

Answer 7

Buy him his own girl-type clothes. Or tell him to get a job and buy his own.

Answer 8

maybe go clothes shopping with him and second hand cloths store so he can buy whatever he wants but it will look like you are buying it...

Answer 9

if your clothes fit him , it might be a way to a larger wardrobe selection......

Answer 10

just tell him