My sister keeps comparing our babies and situations!! It's sickening! What should I do about this?

Question

I have a 6 month old girl and my sister has a 2 month old girl. This is her first child, this is my second. Every time I turn around, she's calling me to ask what my daughter was doing at 1-2 months old. I can barely remember some minute details she inquires about (for example: when did she bear weight when help upright), so I just give her a roundabout answer. She feels her baby is "advanced" and so forth, and tells me her child is "already standing up" at 2 months", as if to brag. LOL! OK, I'm like, good for you hun. It's so trivial to me. She accuses me of overfeeding my daughter, because she's 6 months and weighs 21.5 lbs. She tells me I gave birth to a baby "whale" and I need to put her on skim milk (WTF?). All jokingly, but so smug at the same time, so it eats at me after a while. I didn't diet when I was pregnant like she did, so I had an 8.8 oz.child, instead of one barely 7 lbs.,and still having trouble gaining substantial weight. I'm tired of her mocking my baby. What to do?

Answer 1

Don't worry..I've been in the same boat we have close friends that they have two girls born within months of our two sons. I kept asking what they were doing and for some weird reason I felt I had to hold up to a standard. But now they are 2 and 4 I've realized and "made it okay", that my boys are who they are and will learn at whatever rate. I think maybe your sis is in the "my wonder baby," stage. It is hard but just think about how much easier this is because you just had baby #2 and your more relaxed and your listening to your mommy senses...like your babies eating habits, etc. It is all trivial...not sure what to do with these parents but just pray that baby #2 is not too far and she'll wake up and realize that just being a mom is hard enough and why put the stress out there of comparing all the time...thats what makes us all so special I guess. Not sure if I helped..but tried..PS. loved the WTF.... have said that quite often myself...

Answer 2

Girl tell your sister to get a life and take care of her baby and stop comparing the kids. So what you had a 8.8 oz child. My baby boy was 8.7 oz and 7.6 oz and I fed my kids and they were a little chubby but you baby will slim down as she grows. Don't listen to anyone telling you your overfeeding your baby, if you don't feel as though you are who is she to tell you that you are. Maybe she's jealous that your baby is healthier than hers. After having two kids which are ages 13 and 15 I was a size 12-14, which now after all the exercising I'm a size 8. Get the Ballys ball and some weights to lift and the weights that go around your ankles and wrist do some sit-ups, push-ups and jog in place you'll do fine

Answer 3

Whoa, time to sit sis down and tell her to back off, are you guys close enough that you can have a heart to heart?

Maybe all joke aside, you can just tell her, listen I know you are all excited about your baby, and it's hard for me because I've already walked this walk and talked this talk. We all worry about babys developement, but when you have two children to care for, the novelty of ones growth kind of flies out the window.

If you're not up for a heart to heart, those smug comments can be knocked down pretty quick with some factual comments ie. ...the doctors not worried about her weight so neither am I, or ....yeah, okay, I'm going to put the baby on skim milk, right, what are you thinking sis, you know that is not good for the baby? If it really comes down to the bottom line, you are going to have to tell her, hey, if you want to mock someone, mock me not my baby, I wouldn't do it to you so please treat me with the same respect.

Ohhh, I would be sooooo mad. I can't believe you have kept your cool this long. Good luck, and keep that baby of yours healthy, she deserves your complete attention, don't let your sister draw it away on useless needless stupid stuff.

Answer 4

tell her congrats on having a healthy baby and that even though your child weighs more than she thinks she should shes no doctor and she needs to only open her mouth if she knows what shes talking about----which she evidently doesnt if shes asking you all these questions.....

I had a light baby she had feeding problems when seh was young and now has even more issues she went from average wt to the 5th percentile for 1 yr olds and shes alittle above average in her ht---- babys need to be chubby to allow for the growth they must do----

her child might stand up but thats no sign of advanced infants- my neighbor had one who could stand up at 4 months but then didnt walk or crawl till almost 15 months he rolled and then stood---

i wish my daughter was a baby whale at 1 my daughter only wieghs 17 lbs 2 oz when she needs to weigh at least 20 preferably 23 a almost 6 lb differnce.. just wait till she goes in to the drs and either her daughter is considered average by the drs and she trys arguing with them.....or when they tell her that her child needs to gain wieght and will not eat but they want a 1 lb gain in a month in a child who doesnt eat well


if it really bugs you just tell her whenever she calls and starts talking about her child that you have to go she'll either get the point or not get it and ask why your avoiding her and you can tell her that the comparing has to stop as the dr thinks your child is doing just fine


best of luck

Answer 5

your not overfeeding your child. My baby is 16mts and weighs 28 lbs. At 6 mts he was 23lbs and almost 31 inches tall. And for your sister, ignore her... its very trivial if it keeps bothering you to the point you cant take it no more tell her how you feel but in a nice way.

Answer 6

Tell her how you feel, otherwise this will just get worse and start to fester with you, and that will just put a strain on your relationship. Just be honest with her and hopefully she will stop. I wish you luck
p.s. a 2 month old should not standing up yet, not good for the legs

Answer 7

if i were you i would just tell her to lay off and just give it a rest. Tell her how you feel about the situation. Sometimes when family gets like this you have to be straight forward and to the point with them. She may be mad for a little bit but she will eventually get over it. You shouldnt take that from your family or anyone else.

Answer 8

well first off bigger baby's are better!! ( mine was 9.6) second she is a proud new mom and that's great BUT it isn't okay for her to put down your child, tell her that her baby is to skinny and you think it looks funny and maybe when she hears you doing it back to her she'll get the point. if not try just ignoring her or making sure you like Fib about the age your child did something so she'll shut up!!!!! good luck!!!

Answer 9

Ignore her, she is a new mother and doesn't know what you expect. Maybe you could buy her a book with all the details. She is obviously jealous of your knowledge/family. She would not need to resort to making insensitive comments if she were confident of her own skills. Enjoy your family and kids, they won't stay small long.

Answer 10

Tell her to mind her own baby! Every baby is different in their own unique ways! Your sister is immature. If she keeps on asking you baby questions and then mocks you, you punch her face. lol