I'm 17 & live with my dad & 2 younger siblings. My dad works 2 jobs & is stressed out most of the time & he always takes it out on me...I mean, nothing I do is right for him...I get straight A's in school, I work, I do volunteer work, I never go anywhere (except to school & work), I do my house chores, I was accepted to my first choice college (& I got a great financial aid package & lots of scholarships) etc. but he's still not happy & picks on everything I do...It never really bothered me before, but it's starting to now. Sometimes he makes me feel like my efforts are totally worthless. It's really frustrating when he comes home and complains about the stuff I didn't do, instead of being happy with what I did...
Sometimes I don't even feel like coming home from school or work because I already know that I'm going to be criticized for God knows what...
Can you please tell me how to "make him stop"???? :(
2006-06-13 04:56:23 · 11 answers · asked by ♥WestlifeForLife♥ 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
He's a single parent, & wut agravates me the most is that he's nice to everyone & has a good sense of humor...
& No, he's not abusive...he's far from that...
2006-06-13 05:06:47 · update #1
Congratulations on your wonderful achievements!!! We need more sistas like you. Keep doing what you are doing. Eventually, you will be at college missing your Dad. Maybe he's going thru the fact that his "baby girl" is leaving him. He was a human before he became a father. I don't know your father, but maybe if you sit down and talk to him about how you feel he may modify his actions/comments. Let him read your question and answers. He maybe just overwhelmed with the whole parenting thing. He's gonna miss the shyt outta you when you're gone. Make the best of things now. You'll be home for Thanksgiving and he will more than make up for his shortcomings---because he will realize the contributions you made to the household are GONE for good. I hope things work out for you and your family. Good luck in college!!!
2006-06-13 05:08:43 · answer #1 · answered by gzmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, he may never stop. Keep your eye on the brass ring (college). You will be out of the house soon and will not have to deal with his daily rants any longer. Once you are gone he may realise what he has been doing. A lot of times parents are overly critical because they want to make their children strong and prepared for the real world. It just sounds like he takes it to the extreme.
2006-06-13 12:01:48 · answer #2 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i guess you are in a single parent home. If I were you is to make some time to talk your dad. He is too stressed as you say from work. It is unconsciously that he has to vent somehow. If your mom or his other half is no thtere, you as kids will suffer especially the other one.
I would take some time and talk to you Dad when he is good mood and talk to him every day. Play some game with him, make him relax. Make him as your friend. It is hard to do I know,
2006-06-13 12:03:34 · answer #3 · answered by YourDreamDoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He cannot make you feel anything. You are choosing to feel like nothing you do is good enough. That comes from you basing your self worth on what others think of you. One of the big stepping stones for children is separating from parents and becoming their own person. You will probably never be able to change the way he reacts to you so being able to accept that will be your first step. Changing the way you react to his negativity will be your next step. You don't need to prove yourself to him so learn to laugh at his reaction because you know you are doing great.
2006-06-13 12:46:51 · answer #4 · answered by Rambokitty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him what you just told a ton of complete strangers. Stress that you'll be leaving home soon and you want it to be a great place that you're excited to come back and visit on holidays, rather than somewhere you'd avoid. Communicating how you feel is important.
2006-06-13 12:01:12 · answer #5 · answered by joejoethefunky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't let the fact that you dad is "stressed" be an excuse. you should tell him how you feel, because i have gone through the same thing with my dad and it works. if he ever does get abusive, you should report him to the police, but first just try talking to him and see what his problem is
2006-06-13 12:02:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you have a father who loves you to death and wants to see you succeed and not suffer having to work two low paying jobs. he only wants whats best for you, try to help out, or have your siblings help out and make the house comfortable for him when he gets there. maybe prepare dinner, have the house cleaned, then he may stop bitching at you. doesnt he have a woman? maybe that is his problem?
2006-06-13 12:02:16 · answer #7 · answered by Norma S. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest a councilor find a time when ur both not working or too busy & get some expert help
2006-06-13 12:39:08 · answer #8 · answered by sexmaster AJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably can't make him stop if he is the kind of person that is just never happy. You can't control his behavior only your reaction to it. It's hard when your Dad is a difficult person but you love him anyway. Do what makes you happiest and stop trying to please him.
2006-06-13 12:03:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him how you feel! and remember,you are going away soon,and then your life will be yours to run.I do not understand parents like this! when will we learn that telling a child they are no good only gives them no reason to be good! You are a good kid,keep knowing that!
2006-06-13 12:04:18 · answer #10 · answered by Maw 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋