but daycare coast too much, 4 kids, 2yr,6yr,7yr,10yr. my man makes alot of money, it would take me 6hours of work to make what he dose in an hour. but I miss work retail, I love taking care of the house and the kids, but I want to work two days a week in retail. Not for the money just something for me, is that wrong for me to want, my man is about to work two jobs and then I will be with the children all day long and have no chance for a part time job. He keeps saying I need hobbies and start writting my book my dream job, but with so much time on my hands when the kids are at school or other places I can't think about me. to busy with what's for dinner and what needs done. What to do? I have not been able to sit down and writte or do much of what I like to do.
2006-06-13 04:00:56 · 12 answers · asked by hawkjuly 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
3 of the children our his from his last marriage and the 6yr old is my child, we are planning to get married next year, all the kids call me mom bacause they live with us. I love spending time with them but I need some time to my self. Like time for a bath and relax not just right before bed. I feel like a single Mother when he works all day now he start he's owne bussiness in lawn care and spent a lot of money on the mowers and tools and has to work long hours to pay for all that stuff.
2006-06-13 04:10:22 · update #1
he can't have kids, he got fixed at the hospital with me their the hole time last x-mas and I am not able to have any more kids. His ex-wife and I talk all the time about when she can vist her kids and she has came over with her bf while my man is working. My man has taking me with him every were he gose even to work at times. Yes he is controlling because he's worried I might chet on him, but in his lasted marriage to the kids mother walked in to the house a found his wife with his best friend then he went to strip clubs after work and found a gf, he comes stright home from work and kiss me and spends time with me before he takes off to work on his bussiness lawn care of hand man work or fixes cars in the barn, I like when he's home working on cars then I see him and know were he is.
2006-06-13 05:07:14 · update #2
It's important to have some time to pursue your hobby or just to have some time alone. Since your kids are young that might only be an hour a day for now. Perhaps you could get up b4 them in the am and have some quiet time to think and do some writing. In a few years all kids will be in school and you will be able to dedicate a few hours to yourself more easily. You need some "me" time. It's not selfish and you & your family will be better for it since you will be happier and more fulfilled. Kids are great but don't lose yourself in in the process of raising them.
2006-06-13 04:15:27 · answer #1 · answered by sunnyca 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me see if I got this straight. You met this man who has a two year old kid, a seven year old kid and a ten year old kid. You yourself have only given birth to one child-who is six and therefore school age. But you are tied down at home with HIS two year old and you want to get a job but he would rather get a second job and leave you tied down even more? I think you need adult contact and adult stimulation. It seems to me that he is controlling and doesn't want you to have a life. This must either be a new relationship as he has a two year old with ANOTHER woman or he cheated on you. What about the relationship with the other woman? Are you sure he is really going to get ANOTHER job? That sounds fishy to me. It takes many hours of hard work to get a new business up and running and even when it's up and running it takes a lot of time-I have never heard of a human being in this entire world who could have a fully functional new business and still have time to get an outside job as well. What utter bs. My mind tells me this dude is cheating on you and needs to keep you busy. I am going to predict his next move for you. Are you ready? Here it is-I would bet my life he is trying to get you pregnant right now or he is going to propose it soon. Good luck with that. I think you should take your one child and get out of there and find another relationship or be on your own. You have bitten off way too much than you can chew and you are being treated unfairly. Either you take my advice or watch your life slip down the drain and look forward to a life of sadness and depression. btw you are already a single mother-in case you haven't realized. You yourself have pointed out he is never around. You are just his babysitter!! Wake up and smell the coffee. Surely you can support yourself and your ONE kid!!! Move on and spare yourself the heartache.
2006-06-13 04:45:30 · answer #2 · answered by MAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, it's called "life" for a mother with 4 kids. If you want some self-fulfilment, by all means do something good for yourself because when you take care of your own needs, you will bring a happy mom/wife home to the family. Don't wait until the kids are grown, like so many of us do. Just go for it!!! Don't feel guilty. God Bless.
2006-06-13 04:07:49 · answer #3 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i understand what u feel. i have only two girls and they keep me busy all day. my husband travel a lot . i used to feel like a single mom. i had my own dreams when i was at university. i thought i will be a manager somewhere or i will write a book about philosophy( in french ) or... but i never imagine myself working at home from six in the morning till ten in the evening. i lost my selfesteem. i was nobody. however, this year my husband decided to have his own business, and i am working with him. yes i am a manager now. he trust in me even that we fight a lot . he is a little bossy. i am doing well. he finally gave me my chance to be someone. all my life changed. i am tired i am not lyingh to u, but i respect the person who i become. i take my girls to a club after school. i keep an eye to all they do. they are happier. but i am warning u: u will suffer because u will have two roles to do but for sure u will be a winner.
2006-06-13 04:27:08 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you should of thought about this situation before having 4 kids. I would think you could hire a babysitter. Relatives also come in handy in these situations.
2006-06-13 04:06:27 · answer #5 · answered by mcfly878 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Work at a daycare and take ur kids for free or reduced cost.
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2006-06-18 01:41:36 · answer #7 · answered by YAHOOSHIT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just have to wait and take care of the kids. you made the decision to have kids so now you gotta do whats right.
2006-06-13 04:02:42 · answer #8 · answered by rogdogg187 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not launch an internet business?You can work from home and still handle the babies :)
2006-06-13 04:03:00 · answer #9 · answered by Kitty? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stay with the kids thats a big job right there
2006-06-13 04:20:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋