We were 13 years apart in age, he was older. I had some friends over one night and he dropped his pants and was showing his package to all of them.I always told him that I will do the same to him as he does to me and i meant that. well I flashed my breasts one night and he come up behind me and choked me through me on the couch and started yelling at me. There was more to the scuffle and I tried to fight back. He gave me 7 good bruses on my arms neck and leg. I know I shouldnt have been flashing my breasts! One of my questions is to the men :How should he have reacted? My other question involves his house plants..lol he wants them back.... Should I not stoop to his level and just give them back. But that means seeing him again! I also owe him some money, not a lot. He did live with me for 2 months and I paid the rent and the electric...ect.. How much is that worth?
2006-06-13 03:11:50 · 19 answers · asked by stupiddrunk 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First of all HEEEELL NAW dont talk to him ever again, even if you stripped down buck naked that dosent give him reason to put his hands on you. THERE IS NO REASON FOR A MAN OR ANYONE FOR THAT MATTER TO PUT THEIR HANDS ON YOU!!! Remember that! dont pay him back his money he lived with you so your even, forget him!! I dont mean to be intrusive but you should try thearapy and talk to someone because ur young and you might start a vicous cycle that will reall fu*! you up later in life with men.
Good luck & take care
2006-06-13 03:19:55 · answer #1 · answered by summer_dante 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like you need to have your head examine.
Your first mistake was letting a man lay up on you while you pay all the bills, and while he does whatever he wants, to include flashing your friends, and put his hands on you.
This says a lot about him and a lot about you for flashing your breast around, and accepting this type of treatment from a guy. Where is your self respect? Don't you think you deserve better?
As for as his plants...give him his plants and pay him whatever money you owe him. If you know someone that you can drop the plants house over to. Then do it. By doing this, he'll have no reason to contact you. As long as he know that you have something that belongs to him, and owe him money...He will forever bother you. Is it really worth it, and why would you want to keep something that belong to him anyway?
It's too late to calculate any rent now! You should have never allowed him to stay with you in the first place, and especially for free. I'm sure there probably wasn't any agreement. I surely hope you have learned your lesson.
It isn't worth it! Move on..Once you have gave everything back. Don't contact him. Change your number and do what you can to stay away from him. He's dangerous.
2006-06-13 10:18:44 · answer #2 · answered by WhatEVER27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not see why any man would like his partner showing other people her breasts, but for some reason there are some men that find that a "turn-on". It seems to me if they had any respect for their mate, they would want that to be something private between themselves.
But you acknowledged that you did think it was wrong that you did so, which seems to imply that you were doing something you were not comfortable with, so why did you do it? To test him? You should not want to against what you believe in for anyone or any reason. Not that I approve but I do see your point. If he is able to expose himself, then you should be able to, too. Double standards are SO wrong.
The main question: Why would you even want to see someone that expose himself in public? I hope you make a better choices in the future!
Have someone else return the plants to him if he must have them back. Since he lived with you & you contributed to the bill paying I do not think that you owe him any money, but when it was given was it given as a loan or as a gift?
Most likely, even if you paid him back he would continue to act petty. The less to do with him the better!
2006-06-13 10:30:33 · answer #3 · answered by Selkie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were not married then do not worry about the plants, money , Etc, There is nothing he can do legally except take you to court and try to sue you for the money. As for him beating you...I dont think he had a right to do that under any circumstance. I personally believe the only reason a man should hit a woman if if she hits him like a man, then she deserves to be hit like a man....Otherwise...no man should hit a woman.Period........Remember this though....If you have the balls to hit like a man, then you better be prepared to GET HIT like a man.....Anyway...I think the female breast is a wonderful thing...you did nothing wrong...but on the other hand..if he was showing everyone his little peter, then he is just a pervert and you dont need him anyway.....!!!!
2006-06-13 10:19:27 · answer #4 · answered by 100% Chance of Pain 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
darlin, why didn't you leave him when he was showing off his package? You need to give him his plants, then calculate the difference between the rent you paid and what you owe him. If he owes you, let it go. If you owe him, pay him when you give the plants back. Then look for a better guy! We are out there.
2006-06-13 10:19:02 · answer #5 · answered by Clarke D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hire someone to kick him in his a.ss!! H.ell I'll volunteer!!
Sounds as if he's a huge a.sshole!
How should he have reacted? If he's showing his wiener to your friends then he's f'ucked up and should accept your response of flashing your tit.ties. If he can't deal then you should toss him aside and move on. As far as his house plants...give them back, drop them(literally) on his door step when he isn't home. Tell him the money you owe him is paid in full for the beating you received at his hands.
Good luck!
2006-06-13 11:14:41 · answer #6 · answered by Redeft 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN!! Get away from this guy! Give him his house plants back, pay him what you owe him, and forget he ever existed. So you made the mistake of letting him in your house for 2 months and paying everything, but that's a small price to pay compared to a lifetime of abuse.
2006-06-13 10:16:48 · answer #7 · answered by trueblond195 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this man is very conditonal controling isolating it's ok for him to flash himself in front of your guests but you can't do the same payback in return without getting beat up. hence forth he is abusive you did the right thing defending yourself placeing myself in your shoes i would have tried to physically defend myself you did right if he wants his house plants back as he says he does here is what you do so he don't hurt you again have someone there with you lets say a male friend brother anyone you trust the reason why i suggest this is he maybe using give me back my plants to try to take another cut at you or you could go to your local police department exsplaine your situation to them and state you want to give his stuff back and are willing to but you don't feel safe doing such one on one and why as he brusied you before believe they will be more than happy to help
2006-06-13 10:29:06 · answer #8 · answered by precious52801 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He acted inapproriately both times (showing off to your friends, attacking you).
If he wants his plants back, leave them all outside and tell him that he can pick them up, but cannot come inside or talk to you. Tell him that if he tries to, you'll call the police.
He lived with you for two months, thereby owing you money; and you owe him a little cash, right? Call it even and be done with him.
2006-06-13 10:17:25 · answer #9 · answered by cervantes3773 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, get a restraining order. It sounds like there were witnesses to the abuse, so this should not be difficult. Avoid contact with this man as much as you can. Physically abusive men are not likely to stop abusing spontaneously, and chances are the situation will only get worse if you let it.
2006-06-13 10:17:57 · answer #10 · answered by wis 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋