I was engaged to this guy, that I thought was wonderful but then after moving, with my two kids, two hours away from home and renting my house out, to be married, I found out that he had several other girlfriends. I guess I was either the stupid one or the favorite because I was the only one with a ring. Anyway, I am finding it very hard to date. I can't open up with anyone and I am totally afraid of being hurt like that again. It has been a year. Why can't I move past this? and How do I move past it?
2006-06-12 20:25:15 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
By realizing that the new person is NOT the old one.
You cannot hold the entire male population accountable for the pain that one caused
2006-06-12 20:28:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take it day by day and learn how to trust again..i think it is more difficult for you cause you have to protect yourself and your kids against getting hurt. Let go of the hurt that pig caused you..you are more than he is. Find someone who will appreciate and adore you. There are still good guys out there, give them a chance to show their colors by trusting while keeping your heart at a save distance but not hidden away. Good luck and have fun on all those dates
2006-06-13 03:49:18 · answer #2 · answered by #3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Force yourself. Stop dwelling on the past. Not all men cheat. I was in the same situation you were in, It took a while for me to get past it & move on. Once I did I found a wonderful man & we have been together for 3 years. Now you know what signs to look for & what ever you do..... do not base new relationships on what that man did or they will never work. good luck
2006-06-13 03:37:16 · answer #3 · answered by desiwes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, to really get to know someone, you have to REALLY get to know someone... And you didn't love the cheating...
I'm guessing you didn't love him after all...
I think there's only one way to date someone... Carefully.
If I'm not in their closest confidence by sometime between the 1st and 11th, 12th, 13th, dates... (it goes on... depends on the person) then I'm not the one for her.
I gotten cheated on also. Not like you did, that guy will never be true to anyone. It's part of him now. There's a certain excitement to cheating, and you can get hooked on it. He obviously has.
I guess I'm to assume you've never cheated on anyone. Ever. Neither have I. Because my dating motto has always been: Once a cheater, always a cheater. It's not true, of course, but it's true enough for me to weed out all the bad ones, and only get rid of a few of the good ones. They've tried to rub my nose in their marriages (the good ones I've missed) but I don't really care. Who am I to reward a cheater?
If you figure out how to get past it, let me know. I feel I'm ready to move on to settling down and actually finding a loving relationship, but every time I think I can... I'm not in love. And I CAN'T get together with someone who deserves love and doesn't have it from me.
2006-06-13 05:12:08 · answer #4 · answered by 42ITUS™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That thing, that ring is a magic thing it binds you to your word.
But what about him he's got no ring, I think he's just a Nerd.
You showed him trust, you gave him love and now look what he's done.
He's made you sad, he's bought you down, he's left you feeling numb.
Now, you might think that it's not fair you don't know what to do.
You cry " It hurts, I'm scared, alone, afraid to start anew."
Come on Gal! breath in deep tell yourself the whats true.
Your good, your great, your number one, you are the real True Blue.
2006-06-13 03:57:01 · answer #5 · answered by jewel_o_th_night 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well that is a hard one for you but they why i see it when you go in to a realionship be excepted to get hurt then if you dont well it that much better but if you are interested in a guy in the future what i would do before you get in volve with him find out who his friend are and ask them question like do you know if that guy is married then they well tell you no he has a girl friend or they mite tell you no he just getting out of a realionship but after you ask about this person it going to get to him so be careful the kind of question you ask people that he know.
2006-06-13 03:37:30 · answer #6 · answered by little ace 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Such close relationships are also many a times Accidental relationships.One has to grow every second to know oneself and to put in words his or her own-self.After God,we all are in search of that person who can reciprocate our love.
2006-06-13 03:42:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
These are just signs that you're not ready to start dating seriously yet. Nobody, especially here, can answer your question--you'll just know when it's time to start seeing someone new.
2006-06-13 03:31:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
loves hard and once u give ur heart to tha special sum1 and u trust them and give them ur all and they throw it back in ur face like they dont care its hard and its 1 of those things thats gonna take a long time to cope wit...just try goin on dates and take it 1 step at a time...dont let ur future be lead by ur past
2006-06-13 03:30:30 · answer #9 · answered by Aubrey S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just move on to the future and firget the past
2006-06-13 03:30:23 · answer #10 · answered by rubzebred 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋