i am 15 and my mom left me when i was a baby and i don't know my dad should i go looking for my dad and mom?

Answer 1

I agree with those who say get into the life you have now. Feel better and more secure in who you are. God loves you. It's hard to go forward sometimes without looking back, and really that isn't what you should do either. You can appreciate the life you have. You are gifted. The fact that your parents don't know what a wonderful gift you are IS sad and you must deal with that grief. It's good to allow yourself all the feelings, but also don't get stuck in them. Let go of those negative feelings so you can move on.

Life moves in the forward direction. Ask God to be your Father and Mother. He can counsel you better. See Psalms 27-- it says "when your mother and father forsake you, I will take you."

Hold onto that. It's wonderful to be WANTED and LOVED. God does want and love you. There's a beautiful song I've heard my teen girls listen to. . . this is God speaking-- "Just to be with you, I would do anything. . ." I don't know the rest of the words exactly, but I know that they are saying that God loves you and me so much that he would not spare anything in order to be with us always.

Do you know a beautiful song? I hope so. Hold it close to your heart so it may help build you from within.

Love songs can, too. I remember an older song Ray Charles sang and I enjoy still--
"You are so beautiful to me, You ARE so beautiful to me,
Can't you see? You're everything I hoped for. You're everything I need. You are so beautiful to me!"

Just close your eyes and picture God saying that just for you! It's true. God bless you and give you direction in your search for your roots, i.e., your folks. It still may be important for you.

Answer 2

15 years old is such an ever-changing age. Emotions abound and rebound, and bounce around with new release of "sexual" hormones, growth hormones that can make you feel like you might be better off somewhere else than were you are? These new changes can elate you one minute, and bring you totally down with the next minute. Not having a Natural Mom or Dad to raise you can bring some of these nightmarish feelings to the forefront. You don't say if you are adopted, or raised by an aunt, or what your living situaltion is. I'm am hoping that you are living in a loving adoptive home, or with a grandmother, or an aunt who truly loves you. With growing up, and all these changes, you're in a hurry to "find yourself" It's just feels more urgent to you, at this stage of your life. It's part of your breaking away and finding yourself in a grown up world, and being part of that world, is knowing who you are, which has a lot to do with your parents. My strong advice, to bring this to a close, is to say "no" to trying to find your parents, at least not while you're in High School. Right now, you need to concentrate on your studies, staying calm and focused on you. There's is plenty of time when you're a few years older, to search for missing relative. Be mindful though, don't look with high hopes. If it happens, and it's better than you thought, Hurray!!! But, if not, be forgiving, and know they probably gave you up because they had no other course. In a strong sense, this is a good thing, because we always read sad news cases of abandoned children in awful places. So, at some certain level, your mother and father did care about you.

Answer 3

Do the people you live with now know anything about your folks? They could perhaps give you some advice or tell you a bit about your family to help you make a more informed decision. Remeber that when/if you do go looking for your folks they may not be what you hoped they would be. Most adoption places will tell you if your parents left a note in the file saying that they would like to meet you. Some parents say "lease let them find me if the want to" others may have asked not to be found. I hope that whatever you choose, you are happy.

Answer 4

sorry to hear about your mom leaving you.

You dont know what you parents are like and if they would hurt you and you may not be strong enough to deal with emotionaly. If you have foster parents now and they are good to you and you have a chance of going to college and leading a good life. Wait for all of that and pick age maybe 22 or 25 and search them. Atleast you will be muture and have better understanding to there reasons. Also since you are 15 they may not give you truthful respons. but at 22 or 25 they will talk to you like an adult and you would be able to see through there bs if any

I know its easy to say these things as it is not happening to me, the truth is i dont know what i would do in your situtation. Whatever you decide i wish you the best of luck!

Answer 5

I'm adopted too, but my parents were so loving and supportive, I never felt the need to search for my biological parents. However, my cousin was not adopted into such a loving, supportive and stable household. He successfully located his biological mother and has apparently developed a wonderful relationship with her.

I think it just depends on what you feel is right for you. You now have to look at who *did* raise you and how they might feel (hurt, betrayed, understanding ...) if you search for your biological parents. I know my mom always got a little freaky whenever I talked about finding my biological family - not because I wanted to find them, but I'd comment how people always ask 'have you ever met your real parents?' Yes, I have. They raised me. However, I have not met my 'biological' parents.

All I can suggest is to wait until you're at least 18. Think about it long and hard, because, regardless of the outcome - good or bad - it will flip your life upside down.

Follow your heart. You'll know when it's time to search, if that time ever comes.

Answer 6

No. You're too angry, and that means this is the wrong time to confront them with your questions.

Stay in school. get a college degree. THEN ask yourself if you want to go looking for them.

They were desperate, they made wrong decisions, then they tried to get by on their own. That has made your life hard. Your tough and inquisitive mind will gain you several trustworthy friends. That's something worth building, ah, well, FIRST, before you slog through the swamp of the mistakes your mom and dad made 15 or 16 years ago.

Answer 7

they should be looking for you. i think you already know the answer to your own question. you just want to set aside some curiosities and find closure. being abandon at all makes a person feel unworthy. but you are a worthy person hun. and you don't need ANY one to validate you. go in search of yourself. and FIND YOUR inner strength. that's what you're gonna need when you grow up. not those two.

Answer 8

Honey if you are in good care and safe I would maybe wait until you were 18. I think you would have a better understanding and perspective and you'd be more equipt to deal with these traumatic events.

Answer 9

It seems that you have questions about them....so some day, yes. But wait until you are an adult. If you go looking for them now, they are going to feel like you are pressuring them to be parents to you....if you wait until you are an adult, that pressure won't be there and you might be able to get the answers you truly need....wish you luck...

Answer 10

You mean you not staying with one of your parents?That's horrible.But do you know how your mother look like?Wow this problem is like on of the cartoon movie called "Anastasia". If you want to look for them,go ahead,but don't lose your way if you do so.