Boyfriend considering joining the Air Force! Questions, questions, questions!?

Question

How long will he be gone for basic training? Will I be able to spend time with him after that, or will he go straight into the service? I always hear about significant others spending an awful lot of time apart, but how long would that be exactly? Or just an approximation, based on personal knowledge, if you can help.

Would it make things easier to be together if we were married beforehand?

Would he have to live on base for the 4 (?) years he would be required to serve? If yes, would I be able to live with him as his girlfriend, or would we have to be married? What about benefits? Would I get any as his wife?

I just want him to serve and be happy and enjoy himself, as it's always been a dream of his, but I figure I might as well get as much information as possible. Any help is greatly appreciated!

Thank you all so much for your comments so far, and thank you in advance for all others!

As far as the marriage bit is concerned, we're essentially engaged. He already proposed to me, though we're not announcing it as official because he wants to be able to afford a nice ring for me (though I am just as happy without one!). We're just trying to decided when and how at the moment, as we're in no rush to be married, having already made the commitment to each other in our hearts and minds- the legal bit isn't as important to us. But if it'd help us financially (and emotionally, possibly being able to be with him more often!), than we decided that we'd rather go ahead with the plans, no matter the cost. Problem is, he wants a BIG wedding. Hence the reason we haven't yet gone through with it yet. ;)

Answer 1

Hi there, as a former AF type of 8 years I think I can answer this pretty easily. We'll take the questions in order.

Basic training length? With travelling, waiting for the class to arrive or the like, you can expect the time of going to the MEPS station and completing AF Basic to be approximately 2 months long.

Will you be able to spend time with him after that? That all depends on you, him, and the training school he gets arranged to go to after Basic. You can go and see him graduate from Basic, and spend the day with him, but that would be about it for being in Texas. Typically, to assure a smooth transition, new airmen get travel orders directly from Basic to their tech school. This tech school can be another 2 months long if it's small, or as long as mine, of a year and change for cryptolinguist studies. You can figure on an average of 3-6 months for tech school though.

Spending time apart? It happens. I was in the military for 8 years, and of that I spent about 3 and a half years of that overseas. Typically, unless you're deployed to a war zone like the Middle East is right now, an overseas deployment is no more than 1 year long in duration. Either way, the biggest thing that both you and he need to realize here is this... once he signs on the dotted line his life is leased out to Unka Sam.. he goes where they say, when they say it, and for how long they want him to be there. Maybe half that time it will be for stuff that you're not allowed to go, or that if you chose to go the finances for it would be strictly on the two of you. Speaking as someone that faced that, trust me, unless one of you has some excessive funds stored up already, trailing after him is a very tiring and expensive endeavor. I'm not saying it can't be done, it's just difficult for young people to accomplish according to the AF's rules.

Would it be easier to be married before-hand? Yes and no. You would have legal right to be with him in locations that allow family members to be with their spouse. However as an E1-E2 airman, he would be at the bottom of the list for getting on-base housing. You can get a housing allowance to live off base, but depending on what state you're in, it rarely will cover what you need. When I lived off base in California I had to come up with about 55% of my housing costs out of my own pocket, which hurt the finances, a lot. So, if you truly wanted to be there with him and have legal right to get covered in the housing clause and such, getting married before-hand can allow for such. However...I don't know any personal background here.. but time has proven in the past that giving time for him to accustom himself to AF life first is best if you want him to get all that he can out of the career choice. You can't be with him during Basic. You can't be with him during tech school. Usually leave is granted after the tech school and he reports to his first duty station, and if the hunger and desire to be wed is even stronger then than it is now... that has been the best time for friends I have known to actually get married. So many that did the deed before they went into Basic came out from the schools... different... and so much time apart.. it was awkward.. and ended badly. Like I said though. I don't know your circumstances... but if it was me.. I'd wait.. it's the smarter route to go in today's tumultous times.

Would he have to live on base? As a young airman? yes. He could only live off-base with special permission, or if there was NO available dorms on the base that he'll be stationed at. As a single airman, it takes 2+ years before you have enough time to get the permission. As a married couple you are placed on a shorter list if no on-base housing is available.. but still... it takes time. My friend in NJ had his wife living 35 minutes away in a crummy apartment for nearly 3 years before they could get the permission for him to be allowed to live off base and with her. It was very rough for them.

For the live with as girfriend/have to be married questions? To be on the shorter list for on-base/off-base housing.. he would have to be married. You would not be allowed to live with him in the dorms, and technically, he would not be allowed to live with you off-base if he has on-base accomodations.

Benefits? Yes, you would get dependent benefits as a spouse. Medical coverage, dental, base shopping priviledges, life insurance, the standard package.

And to conclude... you're a smart woman to get as much information as you can before anything is done on his behalf. I know that I didn't paint the prettiest picture about being a military spouse... but... sometimes it's not a pretty life. If he's in a mission critical career field, he could be deployed for years at a time with only the smallest of breaks in between to come home and spend a week or three with you. It can suck. Finances are tight, and there are a lot of growing pains that are stressed from all angles put upon both of you. You don't enter the role of being a military spouse lightly... it's as much about determination and sacrifice for you as this choice of his will be for him. You must be sure... he must be sure... and you BOTH must be extra-specially sure before you decide to add being wedded into this mix.

Like I said, I didn't paint the prettiest picture, but, as a little bit of encouragement on his choice let me just state some of my own AF history. In my eight years, with careful planning and some extreme luck, I was able to enjoy seeing 54 coutries in all, and every continent but Antartica (and I was about 125 miles out on a re-supply plane heading there, but we got called back for bad weather). I was injured, I was in love, and I gained and lost and gained even more back again from the experiences that I accrued in the military. It's the toughest job that he'll ever love... if he goes into this with the right attitude and armed with the knowledge before-hand of what he wants to try and get out of this career path. If this is truly what he wants... then I congratulate him on his choice. If what you want is to be with him during this more than anything.. then congrats to you as well. Defer to his thoughts on the future... both of you sit down and hash out a game-plan... and see what makes both of you feel the best. If you do this honestly.. and keep doing it after every mile-stone in his career (Basic, tech school, first duty station, etc)... then you'll have an excellent chance to make the most out of the adventure of being in the United States Air Force.

I hope that this can help, and if not.... feel free to email me on anything about anything and I'll try and help out with whatever it is that you have questions on. :) email addy is kinroller@yahoo

Wishing you the best in your decisions.. :)

Jeff

Answer 2

The Air Force is a great way of life.

Basic is 6 or 8 weeks, I forget. Basic is a mental strain and not too physical if he is in good shape. Running, push ups, sit ups, that's about it.

Emotionally they can be VERY tough. They will try to see if he cracks under pressure and if he does, he's gone immediately. Rather have it there than while he is bringing a plane in for a landing.

He should definitely get a guaranteed job before he goes in. That will make the difference between if he loves it or if he hates it. If he is stuck guarding a gate somewhere, that will suck.

From basic he will go to school. That can be anywhere from 6 weeks to 3 years depending on the job. You can visit/live with him there. It is very much like college especially for the longer schools. I went to school 6 hrs a day M-F, for 105 weeks, and that was it. No other duties at all.

Housing is in the barracks. 2 men to a room. If you are not married and choose to live together off base, it's on you.

If you get married he will be paid a housing and food allowance. By now it's probably 700-800 a month - ask the recruiter.

ABOVE ALL, MAKE SURE HE GETS A GUARANTEED JOB IN WRITING!!!!

Good luck

GO AIR FORCE!!!

Answer 3

The basic training will be 11 to 13 weeks. After that there is usually a little time off, a week or two. Then he will get advanced training in the USA and/or an assignment ANYWHERE, where you may or may not accompany him as a spouse (but not as a girlfriend living on base with him!)

It would be easier for YOU to be married beforehand if you don't have your own job and career on your own to start with, yes. You are likely to be able to live on base with him (NOT DURING BASIC!) and get benefits, including health and dental, if you get married.

Whether he would HAVE to live on base depends on his job, the base and what he's doing.

The airforce itself has information on family benefits, by the way, such as

http://www.airforce.com/careers/enlisted/benefits.php

Answer 4

Your boyfriend will go to boot camp for at least 8 weeks and then to a school if choose to. If you were married to him you will get benefits as his spouse. As a girlfriend you will not be allowed to live with him unless he lived out in town on his own. As a married couple you will get some more living allowance to live off of and perhaps even housing on base somewhere. You do get a chance to spend time together and only spend time away from each other when ever he goes out on a deployment or whatever the Air force does.

Answer 5

This is what happened to me when I joined the Navy way back when: I was at basic for 2 months, I waqs shipped directly to my next school without leave and I was sent to where the Navy needed me.
He will probably be stationed somewhere else and not able to live off base until he advances in rank. I would not recommend getting married if you weren't going to before hand. Visit each other and keep your relationship, by all means, but don't accelerate it because he is joining.

Good luck.

Answer 6

WE are in a war that quoting Dick Cheney himself that "will not end in our lifetimes." Although the pay is reasonable and the jobs are cool, I wouldn't suggest anyone to join a force that is waging an illegal war with many wars to come.

Answer 7

well these thing are hard to tell you he should be gone for 6 weeks basis training on the other stuff .yeah if you guys are thinking on getting hook up go a head and do so more money and benefits for you both.

Answer 8

The AirForce is a great way to go. This branch of the service is Very family friendly! He will enjoy it.

Answer 9

i dont know any of the time of how long it takes but you should be able to call him, it wont seem long, trust me.:) it'll be aight