I've been with my bf for 3 yrs. In those 2 years, I was in love with him and I was really sure that he would be the one I marry one day. But we talked about us and some answers that he gave me made me sad (i asked him if he would risk his life for me and he had a long pause and said maybe). He said that some things that I say scare him (i.e. i can't be w/o u ). We've been through some rough times but I love him through and through. But..sometimes...I wonder if it's worth it if we fight so much. That's right, we are also very different. So...lately, I've been really tired of his crap. But I also love him. I don't know what to do. I don't want to break up bcuz I am still in love with him. But sometimes, I don't think he loves me as much. I also love to hang with his friends. And I also love his family. I don't know what to do...
2006-06-12 14:45:39 · 14 answers · asked by mekkimaru 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, it doesnt sound like you have fallen out of love with him, you are just unhappy with the way things currently are.
I hate to sound all "Dr. Phil" but is counseling an option?
Whatever you decide, you need to tell him exactly what you told us, "I wonder if it's worth it if we fight so much. That's right, we are also very different. So...lately, I've been really tired of his crap. But I also love him. I don't know what to do. I don't want to break up bcuz I am still in love with him. But sometimes, I don't think he loves me as much. " Tell him that and give him a chance to respond. Maybe if you guys talk about it you will work things out. It sounds like you both have issues you need to work on and work through.
I definitely dont think that his friends or family should be a reason for you to stay. That's not fair to either of you.
2006-06-12 14:53:56 · answer #1 · answered by jenniferaboston 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No matter how much we love someone it's never guaranteed to last, some people fall in and out of love so much that their not even sure what love is anymore.
Sometimes we have to walk away from the people we love the most especially if there is a lot of doubt involved, if you are not sure about your relationship and if he's the one then you need to take a break and do some soul searching and find out if he's really the one you want to grow old with, and vice versa.
Because if you have to wonder if all the fighting is worth it then something is wrong and needs to be addressed.
2006-06-12 21:58:59 · answer #2 · answered by browneyes517@verizon.net 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was with someone for six years and I fell out of love with him after four. After you find out he doesn't feel the same way you do, you're devastated. If you have been through so much and he really loves you, he should be able to put his life on the line without hesitation. Maybe he's just scared to be without you because he's so used to it. Eventually you will get over him and ask yourself why you spent so long together. Honey, if the bad outweighs the good, it's not worth. It's a decision you have to make. When you love someone, it's very hard. Follow your heart. If your heart tells you that you are tired and don't want to be unhappy anymore, move on. There are lots of other fish in the sea to treat you like you deserve and put in the relationship as much as you do. Good Luck!
2006-06-12 21:53:39 · answer #3 · answered by spoiled_042003 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but never mind this question. Your other questions are, " my stylist cut my hair too short" and ''how can I put on weight (or something like that)''?
Petite Asian chicks are hot, with short or long hair. You women are what epitomize feminity! If this guy that you "love" is being a jerk, let him go if you're a good person and things will work out great for you.
All in all, if you will just respect and trust yourself at least 51% to your liking him 49%, I think you'll find that you know yourself and what you need very well. I wish you much happiness in your life, just learn to be your own best friend first. If I were alot yonger, I'd ask for your number myself, but alas, this is not the case. Best of luck to you. Can you fall out of love after three years? Sure, but it's only because you get to know the person and what they are all about better.
2006-06-15 01:16:09 · answer #4 · answered by JB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are for sure too young to think about marriage -- what an absolutely stupid question to ask a guy..." if he would risk his life"... for you......with something that inane, I'd dump you so fast your head would swim. Love is nothing about risking one's life, it is about giving another one's thoughts, one's time, and sharing joy. And why are you fighting???? Children fight, adults discuss without accusing. They share their needs, and ask how they can help, or what are they doing wrong. Geeee, honey, you are a child in the head, but maybe not in the body --- get some help in relationships -- you will never be a good wife, and you will fail miserably as a parent.
2006-06-12 21:53:43 · answer #5 · answered by ladyren 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been dating my bf for 4 years now and at times I think is this all worth it, there are so many other men out there. What works the best for me is if I spend a few days away from him. in those days you will realize whether or not it was meant to be. If he really loves you will be able to tell also you yourself will know in your heart if he is worth fighting for in this relationship.
2006-06-12 21:55:31 · answer #6 · answered by Ashlee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you can..I think you can fall out of love after any amount of time. People change and sometimes they are not the person you fell in love with. It is not necessarily a bad thing. I think you need to look for someone who gives you what you need and if your needs change than maybe who that person is for you changes.
2006-06-12 21:49:20 · answer #7 · answered by SunnySmile83 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off I think that you need to look at your relationship. It sounds like you truely love him. But I think that it would scare me too if my boyfriend told me he could not be without me.... In a healthy relationship you have to be able to give as much as you take. (both of you) I don't think that there is anything wrong but you should definatly be able to take care of yourself if you ever loose him. Maybe when you asked him about the "risk" you caught him off guard I do not think that he does not love you. Give him a chance and give yourself a chance as well.
2006-06-12 21:52:43 · answer #8 · answered by Pinky27 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a lot easier to fall out of love than stay in love and struggle. But some people are worth the struggle. Is he worth it?
2006-06-12 21:52:10 · answer #9 · answered by doc_is 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wasn't true love if you can fall out of love in 3 years. I believe that you were in love. But true love lasts a lifetime+
I hope that you can find that someday.
2006-06-12 21:49:41 · answer #10 · answered by jenepher402 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋