i encourage him always by telling he is beautiful.
i get many teachers and strangers commenting about how cute he is, but he is always hearing how fat and unhealthy he is.
people constantly saying he needs to be on a diet. he doesn't sit around all day and eat junk food. he has days when he doesn't feel like going outside. mostly, those are the days when other kids are teasing him.
i make him laugh and take his mind off all the negativity on tv and from some of the other kids.
i remember one time he got into a fight and the child's father said i should keep my fat son away from his son. even though this kid had been teasing my son. me and this kids father almost got into it. since i'm 6'3 250, it wouldn't have been fair game. he said some rude comments about him being a whale or blubber boy, that's when i got mad.
now the kid and some of his friends pick on him everyday.
they cornered him afterschool one day and pulled his pants down in front of some girl and made fun
2006-06-12 10:49:49 · 13 answers · asked by niss9 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
not to offend anyone, but when i mentioned i was 6'3 and 250, some of you thought i was a lady. how did anyone miss that one?
anyway, my son hears/sees all the negative talk mainly in commercials or cartoons he watches. so turning off the tv will not help. i cannot control the commercials about dieting and if you lose weight you will look perfect, like the perfect model or have abs of steel.
i know it's nice to lose weight when it's necessary but to lose it to impress someone is not teaching young kids the right message.
he does ride his bike and we do things together.
i will take some of your ideas and thanks for the loving comments.
2006-06-12 12:42:01 · update #1
What's the question? stop feeding him so much.
2006-06-12 10:53:10 · answer #1 · answered by Federico 4 · 5⤊ 3⤋
OK, there is no excuse for the behavior of these others and I'll just bet he is as cute, adorable and precious as you say he is. But part of being a good Mom is being a responsible Mom. You need to get him more active. You also need to get him onto a healthy, balanced diet. Since you say he isn't on the TV and he doesn't eat a lot of junk food I'm guessing that what he needs is
1. More activity
2. Strict Portion control (Absolutely no snacking)
And remember, alot of the juices and sports beverages that kids love so much are full of sugar, sodium and other stuff that isn't good for them.
You sound like a concerned and loving parent. God Bless You, Good Luck and Best Wishes to both of you!
2006-06-12 10:56:30 · answer #2 · answered by Dhara 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well, My advice would be to start at home. You have to educate your children about nutrition and exercise, but not only that, you have to explain to them that not everyone knows how to use their manners and best judgement when it comes to ignorant people, as for the children who tease him, they learn that stuff from family members, you cant control what they do. Even if you go to the principal, if they want to pick on him they will...there will be no one there at every moment while he's at school. Going to the principal may even make it worse for your son. If those kids get in trouble for picking on him, guess who they will be looking for after school?? Someone mentioned martial arts, very good excersize not to mention self defence so he will have those skills when he needs them. You should get him involved in something he feels good about to help him build up his self-esteem. Also, take him to see a counselor to talk things throu, if he's already telling you he thinks theres a problem with his weight then there may already be some damage done and he needs to work through that now so he doesnt carry that with him into adulthood. Changing schools wont help him much either, only teach him to run from his problems rather than face them. I wish you both the best of luck. Growing up is hard, he just has to hang in there. He will look back someday and be so thankful he had a parent like you to care for him. (and if he follows in your footsteps, I dont think he'll have many ppl picking on him when he grows into himself!!)
2006-06-12 11:06:53 · answer #3 · answered by Mia 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
My almost 9 year old is chubby too and we are in the middle of a LOAD of tests to figure out why. She doesn't drink sodas (maybe once a week or two weeks). We don't eat junk food a lot. She drinks water almost exclusively. Everyone else in the family is super-skinny and I know it bothers her that she doesn't look like us. There was a boy who called her fat at school and he was severely disciplined. But he said that he was allowed to call his step-mom fat and ugly. They called and Dad and guess what? He's allowed to call his Step-Mom and others fat and ugly.
Lovely parenting there, eh?
Talk with the principal. Take your complaint in and have then SIGN OFF on it so they know you mean business. They can't just say "We never discussed this".
Put your son in another school if possible. Because there is just too much trauma at this one. Tell him to say "I can lose weight but you can't lose your ugly or stupid". Equip him with the right tools to lose weight...either a good exercise routine or a food deal.
Good luck with everything. I'm so sorry. I was called "Bones" in school and made fun of every day. Even out of high school, I covered my body up with sweatshirts and jeans. And I live in Texas and would do that in SUMMERS. It took years...until I was 25....for me to wear shorts and short-sleeved shirts.
2006-06-12 12:00:00 · answer #4 · answered by iam1funnychick 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
you need to get your son out from under the TV and out in the neighborhood to shoot hoops, ride his bike, or do some kind of sport.
Seek out your physician for medical advice. See a nutritionist to establish your son on a well balanced eating program to loose weight.
Help your son. If you don't the trama will be with him for life as the FAT kid.
2006-06-12 10:53:54 · answer #5 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
put his tail on a diet get hisw but up and doin stuff then them brats will shut up lady if they make fun of him like that he aint chubby hes downright FAT and thats really not healthy and no effence but ur not setting a good example to be 6`3 and 250 lbs so u can both go out and play together and cut down on the fat a sweets and stuff
2006-06-12 12:02:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
I was a fat kid, and went through the same thing. Kids can be nasty little trolls. You should tell the principal what's going on, and get them disciplined. This could lead to some self-esteem issues and trauma later in life. It's important that both you and him nip this in the bud immediately. Good luck.
2006-06-12 10:53:53 · answer #7 · answered by Psychology 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
that's terrible! poor boy, children never deserve that, and kids do such crazy things when they're young (the bullies/classmates). parents obviously can be just as bad.
as for eating, eating junkfood doesn't necessarily add on weight, either. if you are
-eating healthy omega oils or cooking with natural coconut oil (not hydrogenated-your body doesn't know what to do with them) and
-avoiding white processed flour (it is soo bad for your gut) and
-avoiding refined sugars (they are actually so processed that they lose their nutritional value anyway-use maple syrup/stevia/honey/cane juice) and
-eating tons of greens ....
it will be much easier to stay on the leaner side. for kids who have a bit of extra weight, it's sometimes impossible for them to eat like a 'regular kid' and not hold onto some more pounds... so if it's that important you may have to change something in your family's eating habits.
as for exercise, some kids just don't feel like going outside...that's fine. but make sure he's getting active or his body will put him into a rut.. you know.. how like us adults do (i know how it feels like). if he likes swimming, hockey, lacross, soccer, football, whatever - get him in there! i'm sure there are bigger built boys in football and hockey that have quite an advantage and maybe your son would love it!
as for the teasing, i think you are doing the best you can do to protect your son's heart from being tormented. it's important he knows his worth- help him in taking care of himself and holding himself with confidence with how he does in school, his friendships, and taking care of his body. people can be so careless with comments and they can cut soo deep- and there is no way you can keep him away from the general vicious public. you can avoid watching the tv shows that are damaging (especially at a young age) and keep him surrounded by a supportive network of people who love him for who he is (family, family friends, teammates, etc) and school won't be near as detrimental. he is the way God made him- who knows, he might be a football player. he'd probably make a damn good one.
2006-06-12 11:06:19 · answer #8 · answered by carlaerickson 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Go to the school and talk to the principle. Have the principle contact the parent and kid and confront them. I'm sure after this they wouldn't tease him again. Kids could be so mean, but it's sad to hear an adult say the things you mentioned. I hope this helps.
2006-06-12 11:03:06 · answer #9 · answered by chocolatelover21 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
i can't believe these so-called adults would act like that. well you are doing by right by encouraging him but you mentioned he is getting these ideas about how he SHOULD look from TV and he's feeling bad about that. Well then, how about NO TV ? ?!?!?
Instead how about taking him to a martial arts class where he can get some exercise and learn some self defense and pick up that self esteem ?!?
2006-06-12 10:54:08 · answer #10 · answered by bbq 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Yikes. Get him out of that school. Or at least, go have a very serious meeting with the principal. But, I would definitely transfer him to another school where you feel like there are more decent people.
2006-06-12 10:53:38 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋