Am I being stereotyped because of my looks? Just a question on first impressions?

Question

When ever my friend and I go out we get hit on and treated completely differently by guys.
She's a teacher, has brown hair, brown eyes and is thin. Guys always take her seriously & want to date her.
I am a fashion designer with blone hair, green eyes & am more of a thin athletic build with a bigger chest. Within 3 minutes guys are trying to sleep with me and talking about the way I look.
I used to take this as a compliment but now I would like to make a different first impression. Short of dyeing my hair brown any suggestions on how to be taken more seriously? Am i right in thinking im being judged by my "look"?

I do dress a little more revealing then her but it's just part of who i am being a fashion designer and all. Compared to some girls out there I'm conservative.

naturally dark blond

Answer 1

Take the compliments in stride. How you dress is an extension of your personality, so I wouldn't dress any other way. You wouldn't be as comfortable. Sometimes a good way to figure out social questions like this is to put yourself in the other person's shoes. Guys have nothing to go on but looks, initally at least. If you are very attractive, this is good and bad because your attractive to everybody. This is good because you have a number of options, but bad because you have too many bad options. You can't do much to attract a different type of guy without a drastic change. To be taken more seriously, mention that you have to wake up early the next day for work, or talk about other responsibilities. If the guy is really interested he'll stick around, if he realizes his initial attack for tonight isn't going to work, he'll back off. Don't be boring, but don't be afraid to be serious. Finally, look him in the eyes is he comfortable with you or trying to impress you? You're a responsible young lady, prove it, drink water.

Answer 2

You sure are, unfortunately. And whats worse, the answer to your question is not nearly as simple as changing your hair color or wardrobe. You seem to be talking about a situation where you meet men spontaneously like a club or bar. First off, these types of places aren't the kind where you're going to find men who are looking to find someone to take seriously in the first place, and even if they did, they have only but a few hours at the most to do so amongst alot of noise and distraction. You should find different ways to meet men. Co-ed sports clubs, college student or professional clubs - any type of social network where a guy can actually have the TIME to get to know you beyond your looks is, in my opinion, your best bet.

Answer 3

That's what's happening. What are you wearing when you are going out? I'm not saying that you have to dress like a nun, but I have come to find that I get hit on by better guys when I look nice, rather that HOT. I'm not your typical hottie, (I don't think I'm hot, but I have heard it more times that I can count) But ever since I started dressing nicer and everything, I hear the words beautiful and gorgeous rather than hot. So try wearing something different. And your hair.. is it bleach blonde? Or natural. Usually guys associate bleach blonde with easy. No offense. And as much as people hate to admit it, First impressions ARE EVERYTHING. :) Good luck!! I hope I helped!

Answer 4

Stereotyped? I don't think so. Desired? Yes. I think it has more to do with your behavior. You say when you and your friend go out. Singles clubs? Well, Do you expect to find a quality, sincere, lifetime lover in the bar? The fact that you are in the bar and dressed in a beautiful quality manner will attract guys who want to know how willing you are, if you get my drift. You said you used to find there attempts complimentary but now you want to make a different impression? On the same players? or on a better suited court? It sounds to me like your focus should be on who you want to make the impression on as well as what impression you would like to make. You aren't being judged, you are being "hit on". Probably because you are hanging around in a place where alot of "hitting on" is acceptable. It sounds like most men think you are very attractive, so , what men do you want to attract? That is the question I think. If you simply want to avoid being approached for casual relations then don't hang out where people hang out for that very reason. You don't need a fashion makeover. It sounds like you need a places you go, things you do, people you see make over.

Answer 5

Men are attracted to big breasts. I still think you should take it as a compliment that you have guys pawing over you. You should find a REAL man. A man who doesn't want you for a one-night-stand. Someone who will listen to you and maybe just wanna cuddle? Then ask him. Or a really good guy-friend. I, personally, wouldn't judge you by your looks. I would only think of how good or bad you look. But isn't this human? Perhaps men just find you a bit more attractive than your friend?

Answer 6

Yes you're wright. No doubt about that, but the same thing goes for your friend. Next time try not to mention you're a fashion designer. It's just that people tend to find this very eccentric and think that eccentric people are easier to get into bed...
Personally, I'd never try to get somebody into bed on a first "date". Just say you're a business-lady ( it's not so far from the truth, you know )

Hope you're not to offended by the fashion-designer-analysis...

Answer 7

Dress like ur teacher friend. Wear blouses or shirts which don't show off ur chest(I'm not saying make it look like u don't have one), just make ur uppers less visible. All u can really do is change ur clothes, and maybe ur make-up, if that makes a difference. If u don't want to dye ur hair, or get a tan, this is all I can think of. also, change the places u guys hang out, and change the stuff u do(no bars, coffeeshops, maybe.), these are just ideas. good luck.

Answer 8

I'm sorry, but I'm finding that some of these responses are ridiculous. In my honest opinion, keep your hair the way you want to, wear what you want to wear, and just be yourself. You can't help the fact that guys are controlled by a certain organ. Just because they think that they can get you into bed doesn't mean that your looks alone brought them over to you. I think if you exude confidence and power, you can set them straight. You always have to power to say yes or no.....good luck!

Answer 9

Sadly guys do judge us by our look but I don't think that you need to change anything on the outside. Instead you should just handle yourself with respect at all times when around guys and never give in to their sexual advances. This will show guys that their first impression of you is wrong.

Answer 10

i would say yes but also the whole package .. blondes have a stereotype and big boobs( are they real) , than for some stupid reason the line of work as fashion puts a little of the same association put with the blonde big boob image. how do you dress compared to friends ? you are being judged and yes unfairly probably by women too... but dont change who you are if your happy and comfortable with you .